Visions of Love
by jennrich2830
Summary: A version of the love story of Alice and Jasper and how they came to the Cullens.
1. Waiting

I just love the character of Alice and have always wanted to know every little detail about her love story with Jasper and how she came to the Cullens. So I've been inspired by others on this site to tell my own version of their story. I hope you enjoy and would love to hear feedback from you! Also I want to encourage you to check out Sarahkw's story There I'll Be. Along with the Twilight novels, her story was my inspiration to write my own. Thanks Sarahkw!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 1: Waiting

**Alice's POV**

He was coming. Of that I was certain. What would happen once he got here…well, that wasn't so clear at the moment. I took a pretend sip of the now stone-cold hot tea that sat in front of me and used the moment to allow my eyes to scan the dingy, half-empty diner. Perhaps I'd been wrong about the date. I felt the slight pucker between my brows as I frowned at this thought.

If my heart had still been beating, I would've felt a flutter as an image flitted across my mind like a movie. I could see the tall blonde man opening the peeling dark green door and stepping into the very diner where I was currently perched on a counter stool with cracked red leather seats, anxiously awaiting his arrival. I could see his curly blonde hair, damp and even curlier due to the steady rain falling onto the Philadelphia streets. He would brush it back out of his flat black eyes with a strong, steady hand attached to his muscular frame. His pale skin gleaming slightly with the dampness. He'd look like a movie star to the humans in the diner. Of course, I would be able to see the thousands of crescent-shaped scars marring every inch of his pale, marble-hard skin.

I outwardly sighed, setting my ceramic white mug down on the pale green formica counter. I could see the misery emanating from his flat black eyes with just the slightest tinge of ruby around the edges (not enough for the humans to notice but I knew what to look for of course). _Oh, please, Jasper, hurry!_ I silently willed him to find his way to me as I turned my stool to face the door. I didn't think I could take another minute of waiting. I'd been waiting far too long as it was. It was time for the next chapter.

"Need anything else, hon?" I swiveled my stool back around to face the weary looking waitress in her polyester sky blue uniform. She had one of those lacy doilies pinned above her left breast with a badge that clearly told me her name was "Rose". As my gaze fell on the name, I felt the head rush of an oncoming vision. "No thanks, I'm good." I heard the tinkle of the bell as someone opened the diner door. I was better than good.

My undead heart leapt out of my chest as I swiveled back around to face my destiny.


	2. Philadelphia

So I probably should have called chapter 1 a prologue since it was really short but hopefully this is a little longer. Chapter 2 is all about Jasper, ladies!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 2: Philadelphia

**Jasper's POV**

At least it was raining. I stepped out from under the red tattered awning of my home for the past few weeks, St. Joseph's Hotel for Men. It was a great place to stay if you didn't want questions asked. Or if you didn't have a lot of money. I flicked the collar of my beige trench coat up around my neck, giving the pretense of protecting myself from the light rain that had just begun falling on Philadelphia. Of course I really didn't need any protection, but the human scurrying along the sidewalk didn't need to know that.

I was hungry. I had been denying myself from feeding since my arrival in the City of Brotherly Love. I felt my lips twist halfway between a grimace and a smile at the thought of brotherly love. The closest I had come to brotherly love in the past century had been my former comrade-in-arms, Peter. Peter and his mate Charlotte had worried about me striking out on my own but I had assured them as long as I stayed north, I would be all right. They didn't put up much of an argument and that had been a relief. To be honest, it was a little awkward being the fifth wheel.

Before Peter, in my human life, I had three older brothers. The memories had faded but I still remembered that it was my desire to be just like them that had led me to lie about my age and enlist in the Confederate Army all those decades ago. I quickly dismissed the memory since it inevitably provoked the thought of my maker, Maria. And I _definitely_ did not want to think about anything remotely vampiric at the moment.

I felt the burning sensation in my throat as the rain-soaked wind carried scent after scent of what I was desperately desiring for my next meal. And the poor fragile humans had no idea how close they were coming to meeting death as I pounded my way down the sidewalk. I had no idea where I was headed. I was still trying to become comfortable being outside during the day. I'd figured the rain clouds would be a perfect opportunity to test myself, walking around the city during the day, enduring the alluring scent of humans pulsing with their lifeblood.

Although it was torture, it was nothing compared to the burden of the guilt of killing innocent humans. You see it was more than just extinguishing a person's life. It sounds harsh, but that I could deal with. It's just a fact of what I am. But it was dealing with the emotions: the fear, the abject terror, sometimes even the glimmer of hope of escape from their fate. I felt it all. I couldn't explain it but somehow I could feel emotions. A mood ring times a million, you could say. I was then able to influence those emotions which could come in handy when secrecy was a must. And feeding definitely made secrecy a must.

The thing was, after feeling all of these intense emotions for nearly a century, I just couldn't take it anymore. Despite never having the need to sleep, I was weary. Lately, I'd even been thinking of going back to Maria and just letting her newborns end it all for me. With that depressing thought, I realized that the rain had stopped. As I glanced up at the sky, it seemed as if the clouds would part at any moment. I suddenly felt a slight panic at the thought of the sun breaking through, exposing my true nature to the humans going about their business.

I quickly scanned the street. Two buildings ahead, I noticed a dull silver diner with a dark green door. The painted letters on the window declared it to be "O'Connell's Diner" and "Open 24 Hours". Perfect! I'd just step in and make sure the sun would stay hidden before making my way back to my hotel. With an effort, I kept my stride at a human pace and approached the diner that looked as if its best days were 30 years behind it. _Even better_, I thought. It would be dark inside and hopefully mostly empty.

As I pushed the door open, I noticed several things at once. I heard the tinkling bell announcing my arrival. The diner was nearly empty, but a few humans were scattered around, my mouth immediately filling with venom as I breathed in their scent in an enclosed space. Then my body tensed, I felt a growl growing in my chest. Instinctively, my hand went up to push the damp hair out of my eyes and I quickly scanned the dark diner. I was not alone. Yes, there were humans. But there was a scent distinctly non-human. Another vamp. And then she was in front of me. She was tiny. She could be easily dispatched. Or detached as the case may be. Her short dark hair framed her face in spiky tufts. She looked a little like that actress, the one who was always eating breakfast at Tiffany's. (I'd been spending a lot of time in movie theaters. I liked the dark anonymity.) And she was smiling.

I was hit with the strongest wave of happiness…and something else. Something I couldn't define. Something I'd never felt before. Then in the sweetest sing-song voice I'd ever heard, the sweet pixie said, "You've kept me waiting a long time."


	3. Hope

A HUGE shout-out to those who have added me to their favorites/alerts. It's a great motivator! Also, thanks to those who have left reviews. Your feedback and suggestions mean a lot. A special thanks to my very own "Alice"! Back to Alice's POV in this one. I just love her!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 3: Hope

**Alice's POV**

Wow, if I was human, my knees probably would have given out as an overwhelming sense of relief flooded through me that my Jasper had finally arrived! It took everything in me to restrain myself from jumping into his arms. Of course that would have been bad since the diner patrons, as few as they were, would surely have noticed the sound of two boulders colliding in the middle of O'Connell's. More importantly though, I held myself back knowing how very skittish Jasper was feeling. Best to take things slow, even though it went against everything in my nature.

I stopped right in front of the tall blonde vampire in a rumpled beige trench coat. He was absolutely stunning. Even his scars were gorgeous, forming the most intricate patterns all over his strong angular face. With his scars and in his trench coat, he looked like one of those 1930's movie gangsters. You know, the ones that were always saying inane things like, "You'll never take me alive, copper!" He was even yummier than in my vision, despite the deep purple bruises under his flat, black eyes. Yep, he definitely hadn't fed in a while. He must be in true agony.

A genuine smile spread wide across my face as I suddenly realized that our lives were about to change forever. "You've kept me waiting a long time." Jeez, was scolding him like a bad schoolboy the best way to start? I wish I didn't just blurt out the first thing that popped into my head. It was a really annoying habit for someone who has visions of the future. I felt even guiltier when he ducked his head and then drawled in his deep baritone, "I'm sorry ma'am."

He looked so contrite and was so very, oh, how to say it, so gentlemanly that a light laugh bubbled out of my throat, and I couldn't resist holding out my hand to him. For a split second, I was unsure, thinking that contact might be moving too fast for him. But that quickly faded as he engulfed my tiny hand in his large one with no hesitation. And what was that? He even gave it a careful squeeze.

My confidence returned as a vision played across my mind. Oh yes, he would not be hesitant to make contact. I felt my undead heart soar as my mind told it of the love to come. Jasper Whitlock was mine and I was his. Forever. End of story. Okay, well, not end of story. But if I had breath, it would have stopped, when I looked up into his strong face and for the first time, I saw a slight upturn of his lips. Why, Jasper Whitlock was grinning! And, there was something else...yes, there was still some pain there in his eyes but there was also a glimmer of hope. Hope was good. It wasn't going to be easy, but we could work with hope.

I gave a slight tug on his hand, leading him to an empty booth at the back of the restaurant. I stopped at the counter, grabbing my "prop" mug of hot tea. Rose the waitress perked up at the sight of Jasper, no longer looking quite as weary as she had only minutes earlier. "What can I get for you, young man?" her hand nervously patting her bleached blonde beehive. Jasper rumbled, "Coffee, black." A slight hesitation, a lop-sided smile and then, "Please." Ever the southern gentleman. A surge of electricity tingled through our joined fingers and up my arm.

Rose handed him his identical white ceramic mug. I watched as his free hand reached out careful not to brush hers as he grasped it. "Thank you ma'am." Rose's mouth was slightly agape. She blushed and then snapped her jaw shut, stammering, "D-don't m-m-mention it. I'll check on you kids a little later." I noticed the change in pressure as Jasper squeezed my hand a little tighter, his gaze on the flush of blood beneath Rose's cheeks. I quickly tugged his arm, getting his attention. I saw the flash of guilt in his eyes. As we moved to the booth, I murmured to him so low and rapidly, only a vampire could hear. "Don't worry Jasper, you're not going to hurt her. Or anyone else in here for that matter." I saw the confusion in his eyes as he slid into the booth. I quickly slid in across from him, keeping hold of his hand.

It had been, well, since never, that I'd had this kind of connection. And I wasn't quite ready to give it up yet. "My name is Alice. Like I said, I've been waiting for you for the longest time." The confusion in his eyes deepened, and they frantically searched mine, looking for answers. Sheesh, I wasn't usually so cryptic. I paused, seeming to take a deep breath, but really using that moment to search my own immediate future. Yep, it was safe to tell him about me, my visions, what I knew about him. Nope, best not to jump into the whole deep abiding love forever thing yet. Soon though. It was okay to tell a little about the Cullens. But not everything yet. My visions could be a little overwhelming for me, much less for this battle-weary, hungry vampire who'd never even dreamed about a life as um—unique—as the Cullens led.

All in good time. After all, this was just the first day of our forever. And then, I felt the hope rise up inside me, and I couldn't stop myself from smiling at my warrior vampire. And amazingly, he smiled back.


	4. Reassurance

Bear with me in this chapter. I know it is a lot of build-up but I am hoping it will pay off in the next chapter.

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 4: Reassurance

**Jasper's POV**

As I slid into the booth, I kept her tiny hand in mine. She was strong. Thank goodness. I was clutching her hand like it was a life preserver. And I guess in a way it was. What was it she'd said? "You won't hurt her." How could she know that? Hadn't she felt my muscles tense, ready to spring on the unsuspecting Rose? I wasn't quite ready to let go of her hand, break that connection. It was as if that was what holding me back from turning the diner patrons into my next meal.

As I searched her buttery golden eyes (Golden!?), I just knew that I didn't want to disappoint her. Ever. She was smiling reassuringly, her heart-shaped face beaming. She was slightly bouncing in her seat as if all the energy within her was just busting at the seams to get out. I'd always been more of the strong, silent type, but I could tell she had to have been biting her tongue with her razor sharp teeth to keep from flooding me with questions. "My name is Alice. Like I said, I've been waiting for you for a long time." She hesitated, clearly waiting for me to speak. It would only be right to put her out of her misery.

I might not have been showing it (too practiced at being calm), but I was fairly bursting with questions myself. For instance, where did this beautiful creature come from? How had she found me? What could a hideous monster like me offer her? Uh, maybe I should just start with my name. "I'm Jasper." She gave me a knowing smile. My voice faltered a bit. God, she was gorgeous when she smiled. If my heart still worked it would've skipped a beat. She was simply angelic. She exuded all that was goodness and light. I hadn't felt these kinds of emotions from a vampire before. Death and destruction, now those were emotions I could deal with. It left me feeling a little confused and more than a little scared that once she learned what a monster I really was, she wouldn't be able to get out of here fast enough. And as far away from me as possible. I felt a little bereft at the thought. But for some strange reason, I couldn't stop myself from smiling back.

"Yes," she said. "You're Jasper Whitlock." Now I was starting to feel a little freaked out. "You said you were waiting for me. How do you know who I am? How did you know I would be here? I didn't even know I was coming here." My voice sounded strained, guttural to my own ears. It'd been a while since I'd had a conversation more than two words long. She must think I'm a total moron! "I saw you coming. This sounds crazy I know. Believe me, I thought I _was_ crazy for a long time." A hint of sadness touched her beautiful topaz eyes. I felt a desire to protect her, to take away that sadness, to never let her feel pain again. It took everything in me not to reach across the table and pull her into my arms. What was going on? I'd never felt this way before. Not even for my maker, Maria. Sure I'd protected her but only out of some misplaced sense of duty. This had nothing to do with duty. This had everything to do with this woman touching places inside that I thought had died when my heart stopped beating nearly a hundred years ago.

Instead, I settled for what I hoped was a reassuring squeeze of her delicate, yet deceptively strong hand. I was ready for her to talk now. I was afraid if I kept talking she would realize what a huge mistake she was making sitting with me in this dark diner, wanting to hold my hand, smiling at me as if I was the dearest creature in the world. Hell, the _only_ creature in the world. She was staring down at our entwined fingers, her brow slightly puckered as if she was working out some problem in her head. I felt an overwhelming urge to reach out with my free hand and smooth her wrinkled brow. So overwhelming in fact, that I felt my arm raise up involuntarily. At the last moment, I let my hand drop and grip the mug sitting in front of me.

She looked up and her pink lips parted, then closed, then parted again as if she was uncertain what to say. I was fascinated by the movement and couldn't keep my mind from imagining capturing those lips with my own, no words necessary. I gave a small shake of my head and forced my gaze back up to hers. She was looking straight at me and for a moment, I would swear that there was a glimpse of desire in her eyes as well. Then with a lop-sided grin she said, "Well, I guess I should start at the beginning. You see, I'm just not quite sure where that is. I'm much more comfortable with where things end. See, I have sort of this unique, um, power?" Her lilting voice went up a bit at the end like she was questioning rather than just telling me. It was so cute. I couldn't help but lean forward a bit on my elbows, drawn to her uncertainty, wanting to reassure her. She'd seemed so sure of herself from the moment I walked in. Maybe she and I had more in common than I had originally thought.

I stroked my thumb reassuringly across the back of her hand. An almost unconscious movement. "It's okay, Alice. Just say it. I get the feeling there's a lot that's unique about you. I promise, you won't scare me off." Her smile grew and her face lit up. "Okay, but remember, you asked for it. Oh, and remember, you aren't alone anymore." And for some strange reason, a sense of relief rushed through me at the thought. I wasn't alone anymore. But neither was she.

**Alice's POV**

I could see the relief in his eyes. Any hesitation I'd been feeling left me. Now I couldn't wait to take away some of the misery my poor Jasper had been going through, oh, for at least 50 years, and probably longer than that. As I stared into his angular face, my fingers itched to trace the intricate scar patterns along his jaw line. Then they wouldn't mind taking a field trip across his full bottom lip. It shouldn't fit his face but for some reason, it did. Perfectly. I somehow managed to tear my eyes away. I noticed that he was leaning towards me, his elbows resting on the table. It looked like he had a similar fascination with my lips.

I felt his thumb slowly stroking the back of my hand. Although I would be cold to a human's touch, that small motion was rapidly spreading warmth throughout my entire body. A smile broke out across my face as I focused on that reassuring motion. _He_ was reassuring _me_! That was what I was supposed to be doing for him! I then realized he was saying something. "…there's a lot that's unique about you. I promise, you won't scare me off."

And then I knew he was ready. It was time for answers. Oh, and to assure him that I was _not_ a crazy person, er, vampire. I took a deep breath, not because I physically needed it, but I was mentally preparing for the next phase of our conversation. A quick search of his eyes forced me to give a small reassuring smile. And then I gave myself over to the visions.


	5. Choices

Big ups to all of those who have read/reviewed and added me to your alerts. I can't tell you what it means to me! If you like the story or even if you don't, I'd love to read your reviews and hear your thoughts/suggestions. I don't know why but I really love this chapter, I guess I'm just a sucker for romance!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 5: Choices

**Alice's POV**

"I have no human memories. I've searched my mind over and over but my first memory is one of waking up in such confusion and pain. And I was utterly alone. It didn't take long though before I realized I had this amazing gift. You see, Jasper, I have visions of the future. I can't explain it. But it was so scary when I first awoke. I can't tell you who made me like this. I've never met them. For the first few years, I survived on instinct and also with the help of my visions." I paused. Good thing he was a vampire. I was speaking so fast, a human would have never understood.

His gaze never left my face. God only knows what he must be thinking. Probably that I was a freak. Which I am. I had to resist the urge to get up and run out of the diner. Luckily, I knew where I saw our story going. That knowledge gave me the strength to keep going. "For nearly 30 years, I was miserable. Surviving on human blood, taking lives, it's so against everything in my nature. The one thing that kept me going was my search for another way to survive. About a year ago, I had a vision that would change everything I thought about my existence." This was it. The moment of truth. It was time for me to let Jasper know what the future had in store for us. I hoped he'd listen. I hoped he'd believe. In me. In the vision. In Carlisle Cullen. Most of all in himself. I felt myself grip his hand harder. As if I could somehow anchor him to me.

"I saw a vampire. He was so unlike any vampire I've ever encountered. So different from me. His name is Carlisle Cullen. He has a family. Jasper, it's a vampire family." I saw the disbelief flash in his eyes. I felt my words come out in a rush as if the faster I said them, the more likely he'd be to believe them. "It's not his biological family but they're his family all the same. I suppose many of our kind would call them a coven. But Jazz, they're more than that. They have bonds that our kind don't normally have. I think it has to do with the way they survive. And of course, I think most of it has to do with Carlisle himself. He's good, Jazz. Better than even most humans." I could still see the skepticism in his eyes but I could also see curiosity there. Okay, that was good. It meant he was listening. My vision of our future was growing stronger, solidifying. Careful now. I didn't want to overwhelm him with too much all at once.

I took a deep breath. Oh well, in for a penny, in for a pound. "They survive not on human blood but the blood of animals. It works for them. I'm sure you've noticed my eyes. That's what happens when you feed on animals. I adopted their lifestyle once I had my visions of them. Thus, my eye color changed to this golden brown color." I gestured to my eyes. "It's beautiful," he whispered, almost reverently. My heart soared. He believed me! Oh, and it was nice to have a compliment. Sure, he didn't say, "You're beautiful," but hey, I would take it. No man had ever complimented me before. I could get used to it.

I leaned toward him, drawn to him unconsciously. My voice was barely above a whisper, "Jasper. I saw you. I saw _us_. Together. In a vision about six months ago. I know you have to be thinking I'm crazy. That this is crazy." A self-conscious chuckle escaped my lips. I shook my head chagrined at what he must be thinking. I couldn't meet his gaze, my eyes focused on the pale column of his throat. "Alice, I don't think you're crazy." He reached out, his finger resting under my chin. He lifted my head to meet his eyes. "I think you're lovely, and you have lovely ideas. I'm not a man of words. I'm more comfortable with actions." He leaned closer, closing the gap between us. And then I felt his lips brush softly against mine. All too quickly, he pulled back. A small sigh escaped my lips.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I don't know what came over me." The intensity in his eyes made my breath catch. "No, it was…it was incredible." Sheesh, I sounded like an idiot schoolgirl with an idiot schoolgirl crush. He cleared his throat and a low chuckle rumbled from his chest. "It was, wasn't it?"

"Jazz?" "Hmmm?" His gaze was on my lips again. "Um, I know this doesn't seem like the right time but we need to go. We've got to find the Cullens." His surprised gaze snapped back up to mine. "What?" Oh boy, I was making a real mess of these visions. Sometimes I forget that others don't know what I know. "I mean, that's what I saw. In my vision. You and I would meet here and then we would go to the Cullens. We need to talk to Carlisle, find out about his lifestyle. It won't be easy, but Jazz, this is how we're supposed to live, to survive. It's what's going to save you Jazz." My eyes pleaded with his.

His eyes searched my face. I could tell he was taking it all in. Trying to absorb all that I had revealed. I held my breath hoping the vision hadn't been too much.

**Jasper's POV**

I was trying to piece together all that Alice had just revealed to me. But honestly, it was hard to concentrate with the taste of her still on my lips. I really just wanted to lean in and kiss her silly. But as she looked at me expectantly, anxiously, I knew that wouldn't be wise. I was pretty sure that once I started, I would not be able to stop and that was a shock I wasn't prepared to give the humans scattered around O'Connell's. Besides, I knew her expectant look was not because she was expecting me to kiss her again. It had to do with this vampire. What had she said his name was? Charlie? No, Carlisle. Carlisle Cullen and his crazy vampire coven.

She'd called them a family but that concept was so completely outside of the realm of anything I had known about vampires living together. And surviving on animals? I trusted Alice. I didn't know why, but I did. But she had to be confused. Surely her visions weren't right 100 percent of the time. The one thing I did know was that at least part of her vision was right. I would go with her. Anywhere. To the ends of the earth. If for no other reason than to protect my little pixie from this crazy, animal blood-eating coven. Headed by a vampire better than humans. Right.

Slowly I raised our entwined hands (neither of us had been able to let go since occupying our booth), and turning her wrist, I placed a lingering kiss in her palm. Never breaking my gaze from hers, I grinned. "What are we waiting for?" Her high wattage smile was all the confirmation I needed. Yep, I definitely made the right choice. For perhaps the first time in nearly a century.


	6. Hunting

Okay, so I like to drag things out, build up suspense, yada yada. I know a lot of you thought this chapter would introduce the Cullens, but not so fast! Ultimately, I am just really fascinated by the idea of how this relationship developed into something that could endure eternity. Yes, yes, love at first sight and all that but trust has to be built so that's kind of my thinking with where this story is going. (In case you care to know, lol.) So a big shout out to Ilithiya for all of your cheerleading, you rock!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 6: Hunting

**Jasper's POV**

She was going to die. And there was nothing I could do to stop it. She was much faster than I was. I mean, of course we were both fast but our non-stop running over the past two days had made it apparent that running was just one more thing that she was better at than me. Sure, physically I was stronger and it was obvious I was older than her in vamp years at least. I think she might have been a year or two older than me had we still been human. Not that it would have mattered. I had a feeling that no matter what life I had met Alice in, I wouldn't be able to stand her not being in my sight. That's what was making this so damn hard.

I sighed as I came to a stop and cocked my head toward the trail she'd disappeared down, listening for her. I inhaled deeply and followed her scent, moving deeper into the Alaskan rainforest we'd arrived at only moments before. We were hunting. I think Alice was trying to make me feed at least once a day although nutrition wise, it really wasn't necessary. I felt like I was swimming in animal blood. I wasn't satisfied though. I doubted I ever would be as long as my diet consisted of the non-human variety. She assured me I would enjoy this more than our previous hunting exploits since there were carnivorous predators in the Tongass National Forest: black and brown bears, an occasional Kodiak, then the smaller lynxes, foxes and wolves. My nose wrinkled at the thought of feeding from dogs. I'd do it but I didn't have to like it. I'd come to realize that my vampire's sense of smell did not appreciate the bouquet of a wolf's scent. I wasn't sure why.

She had caught the scent of a brown bear and in a fraction of a second, I'd lost her. I'd been a little distracted by my thoughts, wondering if I'd really be able to do this. Even for her. I wanted to. God, did I want to. I wanted to be good enough for her, to deserve her. But the closer we had gotten to Alaska, the more I'd felt some of the doubts creeping back in. At that moment, the most terrifying feral scream came rushing at me from the trees. She was in trouble. As I burst through two moss-covered trees, I was certain I would find her in peril, perhaps dying. I laughed in relief at the sight in front of me. I should never have doubted the abilities of my ferocious pixie.

She was perched on the back of the bear, almost as if riding it but instead feeding from it's gargantuan neck. She looked up at my arrival and gave me the sweetest smile showing all of her razor-sharp teeth with only the slightest trickle of blood at the corner of her bow-shaped lips. "Hey Jazz, what took you so long? You're missing out on all the fun!" I couldn't help but join in her tinkling laugh with my own deep rumble. In an instant, I was at her side. And then we were sharing a meal and I couldn't help but compare it to our first hunting expedition. Why had I ever worried? Because our first feeding in the Appalachians had been on a herd of deer. Ugh. And I had worried after that. For a lot of reasons.

Venison is what we called it in Texas. I'd grown up on it as a rancher's son. I had even hunted it as a boy. Yeah, as a vampire it was a completely different story. I'd nearly gagged on the first one but had to keep going because I had been so hungry by the time we'd found a place to safely feed. Alice had finished after two, and when I'd looked up, my stomach sloshing with the thick, gamey-tasting deer blood, I was surrounded by the carnage of five or six deer. She'd been looking at me anxiously, as well she should have. I wanted to let loose with one of my loudest and scariest rebel yells that used to make Yankees quake in their boots, if only to have some kind of release of the frustration that had built up inside of me.

She looked me in the eye and I couldn't tear my gaze away. In a confident voice, she said, "Jazz, you're okay. You're going to be able to do this." With a little smile, she gave a shrug of one of her dainty shoulders. "You get used to it. And trust me, it's a lot—okay—a little easier when you realize that some innocent humans are still walking around thanks to all of the Bambis here." In one way, I knew she was right. I was pretty relieved not to have had to deal with the emotions that rolled off in waves from a human victim. I couldn't help but flash a quick, tight smile back at her.

I couldn't fathom why she had so much faith in me. I know it was because she trusted in her visions but I just couldn't quite believe in them as confidently as she did. Yet. My stomach gave a lurch, and I wasn't sure if it was due to all the blood I'd drank or the fact that she'd seemed to dance across the field and had slipped her arm through mine, gripping it tightly. She looked up at me and her eyes twinkled, even in the darkness. They were like liquid gold, even richer than before thanks to her meal. It was weird but when she was near me, touching me, I felt strong. Like I could live up to her belief in me. Yeah, I could do this.

"Shall we?" she lilted. "I think we can make it to Alaska by tomorrow night." I raised an eyebrow as I looked down at her. "Alaska?" Her lips were tinged red and I longed to taste them. But I hadn't completely forgotten the manners my mama had raised me with. It wouldn't be right, even if I did feel like I'd known her for an eternity rather than a mere twenty-four hours. I'd slipped up in the diner and the memory of that all too brief but tantalizing kiss was as tempting as a room full of humans.

She looked beautiful in the moonlight, her pale skin gleaming. I'd noticed how well-dressed she was. How could I not, with her form-fitting jeans, high black leather boots and some kind of lacy blouse with flowing sleeves that emphasized her, uh, torso. It could've been old-fashioned but it wasn't. The style fit who she was perfectly. And not a wrinkle or spot of blood to be seen. She moved like a dancer, as if her feet were never quite touching the ground. My very own pixie put here to vex and delight me.

We'd been strolling along and had come to a bubbling creek. I didn't feel as put together as Alice looked. In a flash, I produced a linen handkerchief, wetting it in the cold water. I covered my face and rubbed. I needed to re-focus, concentrate on what she was telling me about our destination. A good soldier always studies and prepares for his enemies. And despite Alice's certainty about this Cullen "family". I still wanted to be as prepared as possible to protect her in any way necessary. Of course, if I was honest with myself, there was a part of me that hoped she _was_ right. _If_ the Cullens were what she thought they were, maybe I could have a life with her. Maybe even be part of a family again.

She had turned and was heading back to the trees. I reached out and touched her shoulder. She stopped but didn't turn to face me. I thought about how powerful she'd looked when subduing the deer and how small she looked now. Her head was bent slightly forward exposing the back of her neck. I was torn between wanting to plant a kiss there on her nape and wishing she'd turn around and grace me with one of her dazzling smiles. So I compromised, bringing my right arm loosely around her neck and lowering my face close to her ear. She leaned slightly back resting against my chest. Damn, that felt so right.

"Okay, so tell me all about these Cullens in Alaska," I breathed into her ear, trying to sound nonchalant. She turned her head slightly towards mine, brought her arm up and grasped onto my arm resting across her chest. It would be so easy, just the slightest tilt and her lips would be mine. "What do you want to know?" She sounded slightly out of breath. "Everything. Tell me everything." I breathed. "Okay, but first, I think…" And then her lips closed over mine and she staked her claim on the rest of my existence.

**Alice's POV**

Oh my goodness, I was a hussy! But wow, if this is what it felt like to be a hussy, then that's what I'd be for the rest of my days. I'd known why Jasper had asked me about the Cullens. He was preparing for battle. And he _so_ didn't need to do that. I had to find a way to break through his protectiveness. I knew it wasn't only me he wanted to protect. He was also trying to protect himself. I reminded myself of his desolate existence up to this point. To trust in his previous life with Maria would have meant death. I had to get him to Carlisle as soon as I could. That was going to be the turning point. I just knew it. But I wanted to enjoy this moment a _little_ longer. Gustavus, Alaska could wait five more minutes couldn't it? As he turned me around in his arms and deepened our kiss, all rational thought left me. Oh, what's an hour or two in the big scheme of things? I searched my immediate future and a smug smile came to my lips. Nope, not a problem at all.


	7. Distractions

Okay, I just have to preface this by letting you know faithful readers, that I am no longer writing this story. No, I'm not stopping but Alice and Jasper are in complete control of where this is going so please bear with me. The Cullens don't quite make the scene yet, but I have a feeling they will be showing up VERY soon! As always, if you like this story or even if you don't let me know by reviewing, PLEASE! I love hearing your feedback. Also, please feel free to recommend to any friends if you think they'd like it. This edition the shout-out goes to Sydney, thanks for your support!

Visions of Love

Chapter 7: Distractions

**Alice's POV**

It should have been cold sitting on top of a glacier looking out over the sparkling sea at night as thousands of stars shone down, winking at us in the Alaskan night. Of course we didn't feel the cold like humans did. If I had been human, I don't think I would have noticed. Jasper had tucked me into his side as we'd sat down. That would cause any girl's blood to boil. And I was no exception. Or in my case, he caused the venom to boil.

I laid my head on his solid chest and let my hand rest casually across his hard stomach with my other arm wrapped around his narrow waist. He rested his cheek against the top of my head and every so often I could feel his lips whisper softly against my hair. Somehow I managed to avoid this conversation since West Virginia. I'd tried to keep him busy hunting. I think he had caught on to my subterfuge but being the patient gentleman he was, he hadn't pushed me on it.

I gave a soft imperceptible sight. I wasn't afraid that he would run off once I began to tell him about the Cullens. Exactly. I mean I was 98% sure he'd stay. My bigger concern was what his reaction would be once we met them face-to-face. If he could shut down the warrior within so that they wouldn't feel threatened, I thought it would end up pretty okay. It'd probably be best if we would show up when a few of them would be gone hunting. Then maybe Jasper would feel less in danger. And no one would wind up hurt.

Mostly I was afraid for Jasper. If his self-control slipped, I knew that would be more damaging to him than anything the Cullens could do to him physically. For such a perfect physical specimen, mentally he was quite fragile. I think that's what made me feel connected to him more than anything else. Sure, he was easy on the eyes. But we were vampires for goodness sake! I'd never met an ugly vampire. Yet. But I understood that fragility. It was a bond I knew we had in common.

I also understood that he was stronger than he gave himself credit for. To have lived as long as he had dealing with all of the emotions he encountered, he had no idea that a lesser man would have broken long ago. That was okay though because I believed in him enough for the both of us and I was determined to use my visions to make sure that he learned to believe in himself too. Even if it meant a little white lie now and then. After all, the visions could be tweaked based on what someone decided to do. And if I was able to spare him even some of his anguish a slip-up would bring him, then…

I didn't want to move because it was so delicious being in his arms but I needed to look in his eyes when I told him about our new family. I pushed myself up using his solid-as-a-statue frame. He tightened his grip for a moment as if he wouldn't let me go and I heard a small grunt of disapproval. But I pushed a little harder and twisted in his arms.

"Jazz, we need to talk." Immediately, he dropped his hands as if scalded, his spine straightening as decades of being a soldier emerged in his body language. I pursed my lips, strangely disappointed. Now I was cold. Sheesh, vampires didn't get cold but I shivered all the same.

I shifted to my knees facing him while he continued facing outward, staring unseeingly at the sea. It took several months for the ruby red eyes of the vampire to change to the warm golden tone of those of us on the animal diet but I thought his eyes already looked paler as they glittered in the moonlight. He really was spectacular, his interlocking crescent shaped scars matching the pattern of the glacier snow we sat on.

I took one of his large hands in both of mine and began lightly tracing patterns along his palm, up his long tapered fingers and back down again. My nerves were getting the better of me. I looked up and now he was looking down at me, his gaze intense as if he was steeling himself for what I had to say. I tried to give what I thought was an impish grin and in a _really_ bad accent said, "Vould you like for me to read your palm, kind sir?" I waggled my eyebrows suggestively. His bark of laughter startled us both as it echoed around the Alaskan glacier. He jus t shook his head at me in one of those what-am-I-going-to-do-with-you kind of ways. If I still had a pulse, it would have quickened.

He entwined his fingers with mine and raised our interlocked hands, brushing the back of my hand, feather-light against his lips. Then he raised our hands to his cheek, letting go and cupping my palm against it. I let my fingertips trace along the scars there. Abruptly, he let go and turned to stare back at the sea, his face set in stone, implacable, the set of his jaw tight, his mouth in a grimace. I rested my hand on his forearm. It was a band of steel, tight with the tension running through his rigid body. The trench coat had been lost somewhere in a corn field in Nebraska and my hand clenched in the sleeve of his soft cotton light blue button-down shirt. I stood up and tugged.

"Walk with me. At human speed. It'll be good practice for us both." He looked at me with his eyebrow raised. I was learning that this was how he looked at me when skeptical of my motives. But I also knew that he would give in. He always did. Eventually. I looped my arm through his like how I imagined the Texas belles in his youth did when he went a-courting. A small smile touched my lips at the thought. Oh, I knew he'd been more concerned with warfare than courting in his human youth, but it was fun to pretend.

He let me lead him to the trees. Moonlight beamed through the branches leaving unusual shadow patterns across our path. We came upon a fallen tree. Jasper sat down and the next thing I knew, I was across his lap, my arms grasping around his neck. But I was in no danger of falling. His arms were locked tight around my waist.

I put my forehead against his, then rubbed my nose gently against his. "Eskimo kiss," I whispered. The corners of his mouth turned up. Then his lips were against mine, insistent, demanding, and oh so hot. When he finally pulled away, I was trembling. Our foreheads were still touching and he was gazing so deeply into my eyes, I felt like he could see all the way down to my toes. Then he smiled and whispered, "Texas kiss." My laughter flowed around us and hi joined in.

Then I hugged him tight around the neck, putting my cheek against his smooth forehead. I slid my fingers up into his blonde curls and tugged his head back. Looking into his eyes, I laughed and said, "Oh Jasper, I do lo-, uh, love it when you kiss me." Whew! That was close. I mean, you couldn't tell someone that you love them after three days! Could you?

His eyes widened slightly, surprise emanating from them. "I'm kind of fond of kissing you, pixie," He half-smiled back at me. Damn, I'd let him distract and dazzle me again. I held his head in place so I could see into his eyes. He could have broken my grip so easily and the fact that he didn't, gave me the courage to speak. I just hope he'd listen before running away.

If he ran, I sure would miss those Texas kisses. And I'd just have to chase him down to get some more of them.

**Jasper's POV**

She drove me to absolute distraction. She was as light as a feather on my lap but I shifted her weight all the same, not wanting her to realize the source of my discomfort. Her grip tightened in my hair as if she was afraid I was trying to push her away from me. She was gazing down into my eyes. Her eyes were like molten fire almost flickering like real flames would.

I was half-smiling at her. She'd nearly said she loved me but changed her words at the last minute. So she loved kissing me. Well, ditto. I was pretty sure eternity was not going to be long enough for me to get my fill of her hot, sweet kisses.

And she loved me. Of that I was certain. I mean, she should have known with my ability that there's not many emotions you can hide from me. I knew why she was scared to say it. The same reason I was. She wasn't sure of me. She thought I might run off. I wasn't sure of me either. I was scared I might run off. Or worse, destroy the Cullens she believed in so much. And then she wouldn't love me. At best, she would hate me. At worse, be disappointed in me. Most probably both. And that would be something I couldn't live with.

She was worrying her bottom lip between her teeth. She _was_ nervous. I just couldn't bear being the source of her distress. Okay, I was going to be open-minded about this. She hadn't led me astray yet. Well, except for the deer, yuck! But that wasn't her fault.

I reached up and cupped her cheek. I drew my thumb across her bottom lip, pressing gently to pull it from between her teeth. The corners of her lips turned up as I rubbed gently across the place she'd been nibbling on. I tore my gaze away from her lips and up to her eyes.

"Go ahead," I whispered. "I promise I'm not going anywhere. At least not without you. Besides, I'd be crazy to think I could outrun _you_." I flashed a grin at her and she impishly grinned back as her eyes lit up. God, there was no way I was running away from that. Cullens, be damned.


	8. Declarations

Well, I am on the road this weekend and since I spent most of the day in the airport, I was able to get 2 chapters done. Also, I'm having to type this on my dell mini so I apologize for the typos. I'll post corrections when I get home. I hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: I am writing this story because I am a fan of Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight Saga. I do not own any of the characters, plot lines or any Twilight-related materials.

Visions of Love

Chapter 8: Declarations

**Jasper's POV**

Alice let go of me and slid to her knees in front of me, never breaking her gaze from mine. She clasped both my hands, each with one of her own. Wow, she was really holding tight. I was a man, a fierce soldier in battle, I was _not_ going to wince. But ouch. Her brow wrinkled in concentration. I knew this look by now. This was how she tried to keep from blurting out the first thing that popped into her head. Both habits were adorable. I could almost see her counting to ten in her mind. I sent out a vibe trying to calm her nerves. Her brow furrowed deeper.

Oka-a-a-y. Obviously my power wasn't working on her. Weird. Then she suddenly burst out, "Are you trying to calm me?" I grinned sheepishly. I'm sure she could read the guilt all over my face. I gave a quick nod. She looked at me reprovingly. "Well stop it. I need my head clear when I tell you this." Okay, well it did work, but she was right. I didn't want to influence her like that. I wanted her emotions to be genuine around me.

"Sorry," I muttered. "Go ahead. Please. The suspense is killing me." I squeezed both her hands, partially to reassure her and more importantly to relieve some of the pressure she was applying. Again, ow. "Sorry Jazz, I'm just trying to sort out where to start. You know how I am about beginnings." She smiled at me so sweetly that I couldn't help but extricate one of my hands and reach up and stroke her pale cheek with my fingertips.

"Just start at the beginning, pixie. I promise, I'll listen." Her lips trembled slightly through her smile and she drew a shaky breath. "Well, that would make it a _really_ long story and I'm not sure if it's completely fair to tell you everyone's history. I'm sure you'll get their versions in good time." She paused and was staring at me steadily. Another breath now, less shakier and she continued.

"I told you that Carlisle was good. And he is Jazz. He's lived a lot longer than us and has seen much in his 350 or so years but he's never taken a human life." I recoiled slightly in my shock but her grip tightened even more if that was possible and her gaze never wavered.

"I know it's hard to believe. But it's true. You'll realize it when you meet him in person. His sincerity and his compassion are his gifts. He sees the good in everyone, human and vampire alike. It's a beautiful thing, the reverence he has for life." She was still looking in my eyes and I was mesmerized. I couldn't look away if I wanted to. And I didn't want to.

There was something else. As she spoke about this Carlisle, it was as if I could _feel_ the sincerity, the compassion. She was telling the truth. Okay, so this Carlisle was all right but what about the rest of his coven? (No way was I calling them a family.) "Again, this is going to be hard to believe," she continued. "He's a physician. For humans. He's done it for so long, and is so disciplined. Not one slip-up." Her voice trailed off and she sounded a little envious.

"His professions is what led him to this family. He was alone for a very long time. For centuries. He was loathe to condemn anyone to his fate." I nodded my head. I could understand that feeling. I thought about the hundreds of newborns I'd condemned to a short, violent existence. Great, another creature I'd disappoint. I'm sure this Dr. Cullen would be appalled by my former lifestyle.

"Ahem." My gaze snapped back to Alice's. "But he was lonely. He eventually decided to make himself a companion. You see Jazz, as good as he is, he isn't perfect. None of us are." She'd shifted to sit beside me on the log. She reached out and slid her fingertip down the bridge of my nose. And in an instant, she replaced the tip of her finger with a quick smack of her lips.

I smiled at her guiltily. She read me so well. I couldn't resist reaching down and giving her a brief peck on the lips. Oops, that wasn't going to be enough. I started to deepen the kiss, moving my lips hungrily against hers, but in a flash, she placed both hands on my chest and shoved. Not that she could have moved me. But I got the hint. Reluctantly, I lifted my head. I raised an eyebrow in question. She grinned that imp's grin of hers. "You're distracting me again."

"Sorry." I grinned back, not sorry at all. "Where was I? Oh, right. Edward." Her gaze softened. And suddenly I hated Edward even though I didn't know who he was. Vitriolic, scalding, deeper-than-the-ocean hatred. He would die.

Grasping on either side of my head, she scanned my face, her gaze horrified. "Jasper, NO!" _YES!, _my mind screamed. "_NO!"_ She said again forcefully. Then she kind of shook my head as if she was literally shaking sense into me. "It's _not_ like that. At all. He's going to by my brother, my best friend. Yours too. But that's _it_." The intensity of her gaze bore into me burning a hole through the shroud of hatred I'd cloaked myself with. "I swear to you on my existence."

Suddenly, she slid her arms around my neck and pulled herself to me until her chest was crushed against mine. Okay the hatred was now being replaced by a deeper emotion. Her lips were less than an inch from mine. " You silly, silly man. Don't you know by now that I love you? Only you? For the rest of our days? I'm yours. Forever."

If she was going to say something else, she didn't get the chance because I crushed her lips to mine. I was so rough that our bodies and lips sounded like a small clap of thunder when they came together. I couldn't get enough. I was consumed by fire, desire, determined to brand her as mine. My hands, lips, teeth were everywhere and hers were too. When were nearly at the point of no return, I could feel her pulling back, albeit reluctantly. What was I doing? She must think me a madman.

Harsher than I meant to be, I lifted her by her shoulders and physically set her away from me. She looked at me in shock, her fingertips pressed against her lips. "Sorry." I seemed to say that a lot around her, my voice sounding deeper and harsher than usual. I tried to smile to reassure her, but only half of my mouth made it up.

"Guess I'm not so good at this self-control thing. I can't imagine how you could love a monster like me anyway." I'd meant to say it lightly as if her answer didn't really matter. Instead, it sounded the exact opposite of that, filled with every ounce of the misery, anger, and self-loathing I was feeling. She still hadn't said a word. I was scared of what I'd see but I couldn't stop myself from turning to look at her, needing to see the revulsion and horror so I wouldn't feel guilty when I left her.

Her eyes were bright as if there would be tears there if she were able to produce them. And she didn't look horrified or even pissed. She looked hurt and a little scared. A crude curse escaped my lips. Christ, I'd made her cry. In a manner of speaking. I _was_ a monster. Of the worst sort. I felt a lump in my throat. Wow, if I could produce tears, now _I_ would be crying. And I'd _never_ cried. Not even when I was human and seven years old and my pa had died. What the hell was wrong with me?

I had to take away her pain, replace the hurt in her eyes. My voice was choked, "Pixie, love, it's not you. It's me. I'm just so spitting mad at myself. Please forgive me. I didn't mean to hurt you." Although there was still some wariness in her eyes, I could see them softening as well. I inched toward her closing the gap between us. The gap I was responsible for. I stretched my hand out toward her face, hesitating.

As I started to let it drop, she caught it and brought my palm to her lips. She placed a kiss there and then, wow, her tongue darted out. This pixie bewitched me in ways Maria and her vampire companions could never have dreamed of. I gave her what I hoped was my most charming smile. The desire was still surging through me, never quite quenched. I sighed inwardly. I supposed that's how it would always be.

"So does that mean I'm forgiven?" She dazzled me with a brilliant smile. "There's nothing to forgive. Oh, just don't leave me. And please, don't kill Edward." Unable to resist, drawn to her like a siren, I founhd myself leaning toward her. Brushing my lips ever so gently against hers, I murmured, "I promise. Oh, and pixie, in case you couldn't tell, I love you too." And this time she was the one who initiated the crushing of the lips.

**Alice's POV**

In a matter of minutes, I'd gone from complete desolation to extreme exultation. Jasper Whitlock loved me! Of course, I'd seen it coming, but my visions were subjective, always a slave to someone changing their mind. His reaction to the mention of Edward Cullen had scared me. Bad. I had almost decided to abandon an introduction. But now that he had declared his love, it made sense. And just as quickly, I'd seen that it would not end in a battle. Thank goodness, but I needed to tell him about the others. He needed to be prepared for what to expect the next day.

Tomorrow, we would become part of a family. Our declarations of love were just the first building block of our new life. Reluctantly, I pulled my lips from his. "Wow, Jazz, I can't believe this is happening. You love me." I looked at him a little incredulously. He grinned at me. "Yep. I do. I think I've known it from the moment you took my hand in that diner but I was too scared to admit it." I saw the love shining from his eyes and I felt a rush of relief that part of my vision had come to pass. Now just to make sure the rest of it did.

"Okay, listen, I've got to tell you about the rest of the Cullens. I don't want any surprises tomorrow." I tried to look as serious as I could. His gaze sobered and I knew he was matching my mood. I could feel the tension return to his body, steeling himself for my next revelations. I began to tick off my fingers. "Okay, I told you all about Carlisle. I _started_ to tell you about Edward." I gave him a small glare. He had the grace to hang his head slightly and look embarrassed.

"Edward was Carlisle's first companion. He is good too but you have something in common with him. Neither of you realize how good you really are. _And_ how much you both deserve love. He was about 17 and dying of Spanish influenza when Carlisle turned him. That's how Carlisle is. He's only turned those who were about to lose their human lives anyway." I paused and scanned his face to make sure that he was under control. He was.

"Then there was Esme. She's Carlisle's wife. She suffered a lot in her human years and it's given her a great capacity for love. She's also an excellent mother. We'll be lucky to have her." To Jasper's credit, he merely gave a small not to acknowledge he was listening. He didn't try to argue but I could tell he was a little skeptical by the tight line of his mouth.

"Next came Rosalie. She's absolutely gorgeous, the most beautiful creature you'll ever lay eyes on." He opened his mouth to protest and I placed a finger against his lips. "Shh, don't argue. You'll see. It doesn't matter because she has her Emmett. He's a big bear of a guy, a bit of a cut-up but he's a fierce protector. Like you." I smiled shyly at him. He smiled back behind my finger.

"So that's the Cullen family. We're going to complete them, Jazz. And they'll complete us. You'll see, it's meant to be." His gaze had never strayed from mine while I had told him of our new family. Although I knew he was still worried, I saw that glimmer that I had seen in that dingy diner in Philadelphia. Hope. Deep down inside Jasper Whitlock, there was a growing flame of hope. He just wasn't ready to admit it yet. He would. Soon.

Reaching up, I grabbed either side of his face and pulled his lips down to mine. He didn't resist. And as our lips met, I did my best to stoke that flame until it was a burning raging fire out of control.


	9. Home

Wow, I can't believe we're already to chapter 9! Thanks to everyone who's added me to their alerts and favorites! It is truly flattering! I really just started this as something for myself since I wanted to know Alice and Jasper's story and I'm so glad that you all seem to be enjoying it as well (even all the way in France, thanks Elinas!). I have to say that although Alice is my favorite, I am really loving Jasper. I always thought I would be Team Edward forever, but I'm finding out that I have a serious attraction to quiet gentlemen with tortured pasts no matter who they are! As always, please review and let me know how I'm doing.

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 9: Home

**Alice's POV**

The sun had been shining all day. This was not good. It meant we were going to have to put off joining the Cullens. At least until we wouldn't sparkle walking down the streets of Gustavus. Exposing what we were, endangering the life the Cullens had built here, well, that wouldn't make a very good first impression.

Jasper's hand tightened around mine. I'm sure he sensed my frustration at the delay in my plans. We'd explored Gustavus the night before, getting a sense of the town we would soon be a part of. It was small with a permanent population of around 500 or so. And it was really isolated. Humans had to fly or boat in since it was surrounded by Glacier Bay National Park.

I could see the appeal though. The locals kept to themselves, so they wouldn't pry into the lives of the young doctor's family. It was close to Juneau, giving Dr. Cullen easy access to the hospitals. They could even claim his foster kids attended a private school in Juneau, sparing them from the risk of exposure at the tiny local high school. Along with Glacier Bay, Tongass park was close by as well providing a nearby hunting ground stocked well with plenty of meat-eating animals as Jasper and I could attest too after our last hunting excursion.

When summer arrived with its longer days and hordes of tourists, the Cullens packed up and made the short run to Denali. Carlisle had some old friends who lived there. Another family. They also survived on the blood of animals. As the faces of three incredibly gorgeous women flitted across my mind, I pursed my lips in disdain. Best not to tell Jasper about them yet. He was having a hard enough time dealing with the Cullens. It had absolutely _nothing_ to do with the beauties I saw. Sure.

I peeked up at Jasper. I was doing my favorite thing—lying in his arms. Okay, well, my second favorite thing. We were lying next to a creek, content just to be in each other's arms. Neither of us had spoken for a while. It wasn't necessary. Two creatures who had been alone as long as we had, well, it was simply thrilling to revel in the new sensation of being with someone that you loved and that loved you back.

I knew he was apprehensive about this evening. The arm that was wrapped around me was playing with my hair. There was a slight frown on his face, his rose-colored eyes staring up at the sky. I had noticed that he absently played with my hair when he was thinking. I could only hope he wasn't working out some kind of battle plan in his mind. I didn't _think_ so based on what I was seeing but there were a lot of unforeseen complications.

The sun was one, definitely not normal for January in Gustavus. Then I hadn't expected to see that other vampire family. But that was where Emmett and Edward had gone hunting. I'd been searching them out so I could gauge when it would be safe, well, safer for us to arrive. Apparently, Emmett loved bears. Big ones. So he'd convinced Edward to go to Denali where he could bring down a grizzly or two. Or three. But I could see them heading back soon. Edward was avoiding a strawberry blonde named Tanya.

I smiled as I saw a particularly awkward incident of Edward trying to avoid her kiss. Jasper must have felt the movement of my lips against his bare chest. "Something funny?" I loved to hear the rumble in his chest when he spoke since I was denied the pleasure of hearing his heartbeat.

I began tracing patterns on the sculpted muscles of his upper torso. My smile widened as I thought of how I'd convinced him to take his shirt off so I could see him sparkle in the sun. My hand moved lower rubbing across the defined muscles of his stomach. His free hand captured mine stopping the movement as he growled, "Keep that up, pixie and we'll never make it to the Cullens tonight."

My head whipped up and my gaze met his. His eyes were smoldering but there was a hint of a smile on his lips. "What?" My voice squeaked. Sheesh, I hated that. Oh well, it's not like he wasn't aware of my reactions to him.

"I mean, not that I care. In fact, I'm all for it. But I know how anxious you are to do this. Meet the Cullens, I mean." His eyes twinkled teasingly. If I could've blushed, I know I would've been beet red from head to toe. It wasn't my fault that I'd gotten a little, um, forceful with him last night. He really shouldn't have done that thing where he…

He pulled me back from my thoughts with a gentle tug on the hair at the nape of my neck. He chuckled. "Don't look so shocked, pixie. I'm _so_ not complaining." He squeezed the hand that was resting on his belly. Then he reached up and placed a finger under my chin, gently pushing up and closing my gaping mouth.

Damn. Yet another embarrassment. I shouldn't be. After all, neither of us could seem to get enough of the other. We were reveling in the discovery of our new love, our first loves.

Suddenly, I was angry with myself. He was right. I knew he was teasing but still, he was right. I was losing sight of what was important. It was imperative that I channel all of my focus into seeing how things were going to go tonight. Although I couldn't wait to be part of a family, an experience I'd never had (well, as far as I knew with no human memories to rely on), my bigger concern was protecting Jasper. And I would. As much as I wanted to be a Cullen, I also knew I would die for him.

Of course, I had seen that I would love him. What I hadn't expected was how absolutely consuming and overwhelming that love would be. But, ultimately, I didn't really think that I'd have to make that choice. Now I needed to concentrate, clear my head so I could see if any more surprises were in store for us.

The sunlight was fading. Twilight was approaching. That meant our time alone was coming to an end for a while. A part of me was a little sad at the thought. The past few days had been the happiest of my existence. Amazingly, as I searched out our immediate futures, I realized that even happier times awaited us.

I jumped up in one fluid movement, grabbing Jasper's shirt at the same time. Now he was the one who looked surprised. Dropping the shirt on top of his chest, I reached down and grabbed his hand, tugging it. "Get up, love. It's time."

And he was no longer sparkling but was instead gleaming as the twilight sky darkened to night. He looked dangerous and sleek in the moonlight, his face fierce. But I could see the hint of fear behind the warrior façade. Oh my, I hoped my vision was right. Time would tell.

Uh-oh. We had to go. NOW! Or I was going to miss out on the bedroom I wanted. I turned and took off, the wind whipping in my face. I just hoped Jazz was keeping up.

I needn't have worried. A flash of blue caught my eye and he was there. Exactly where he belonged—at my side.

**Jasper's POV**

Damn, she was fast. It was taking all of my efforts just to keep up with her. I felt a little exhilarated though, being by her side. It was where I belonged. I tried to focus on that feeling. If this is where I wanted to stay, then I'd better be on my best behavior when we reached our destination. Which at this rate, we would reach in a matter of minutes.

We ran deeper into the forest, the trees a blur. Well, at least the Cullens' house would be well protected from unwanted visitors. Well, at least unwanted _human_ visitors. I was still wary of their reaction when we arrived on their doorstep.

It suddenly occurred to me that Alice and I had not discussed our approach. Great. So were we just going to go up and knock on the door? Introduce ourselves and say, "We're here to join your coven." Right. I mean, why didn't Hallmark make a card for this kind of occasion?

Knowing my pixie, she'd probably just burst through the door and just blurt the whole sordid story out. That's what I was afraid of because then she would be in danger. Never a good idea to surprise a houseful of vampires. Okay, how to slow her down, get her to think about this?

Well, I could send out some calming vibes, cloud her mind a little. Or…I could finish what she'd started by the creek. Much more appealing thought. But almost as quickly as I'd decided, it was too late. We'd arrived.

We both came to a stop, in awe of the sight. I couldn't help giving a low whistle. An architectural masterpiece stood before us. It was huge. Literally, a glass house but framed with deep mahogany wood. The glass was obviously covered in some kind of protective coating because you could not see in. It was three stories high, the first story taller than the other two. The first two stories were lit up, light streaming out onto the expansive front lawn we were standing in the middle of. The third story was dark. There was an interesting tower reaching toward the sky on the right side of the third story.

I don't know how long we stood there but my attention snapped to Alice as she slipped her hand into mine and squeezed. "Oh Jazz. Wow, I mean, wow. I can't believe this is going to be our home. It's amazing!" I felt my eyebrow shoot up. I knew my lips were set in a grim line. I could feel the tightness in my cheeks.

I didn't want her to get her hopes up. But the light in her eyes told me it was too late. Her even white teeth shone in the light cast from the floor to ceiling windows of the house. I wondered if the Cullens were in there, looking out at two strange vampires holding hands on their snow-covered lawn.

At the thought, I felt my body tense, ready to spring into action at the first sign of any danger. Alice moved in front of me, her eyes never leaving my face. She placed both of her hands on my chest and lightly rubbed. Okay, I was still tense but for an entirely different reason now. Unwittingly, my arms raised and my hands spanned her tiny waist. I tugged her forward until our bodies touched. I was the one with the ability to influence emotions, calm those around me, but I swear, the woman could do the same to me with one touch.

"Jazz, everything's going to be okay. Carlisle, Esme, and Rosalie are inside. Emmett and Edward will be here soon." She slid a hand up and cupped my jaw, her gaze intent. "Here's the plan. We're going to go to the door and ask for Carlisle. They won't attack us. I promise. You know you can trust me, right?" I slowly nodded. I did trust her. But if something happened to her…God, I didn't know what I'd do.

It was then that I realized this moment was bigger than meeting some new vampires. This was me putting my life in her hands, _truly_ believing in the gift she possessed. If I was going to be with her, love her, I needed to put my _entire_ faith in her. If I didn't then there was no reason for us to continue. Well, damn. There was no choice to make. No way I was leaving here without her.

And then I knew unconditionally, I _did_ believe her. This introduction _was_ going to be okay. Reaching up, I clasped either side of her face, letting all of my love, faith, devotion to her, roll off of me in waves, channeling it to her. She gave a loud gasp, both of her hands flying up and grabbing mine.

Then ever so slowly, never breaking my gaze, I leaned in and claimed her lips. Her lips molded to mine and I could feel every bit of her love and devotion crash over me wave after wave. I moaned softly as our kiss deepened and she whimpered in response. I only broke the kiss when I heard the heavy mahogany front door swing open.

In an instant, I had pushed Alice behind me and crouched defensively. It was pure instinct. I knew no harm would come to us as I looked toward the house and saw a pale blonde male vampire framed in the doorway, looking like an angel with the light flowing around him.

He looked confused and more than a little wary. I felt Alice place her hands on my back and then she peeked her head around my left side. "Carlisle?" Her voice sing-songed into the still night. "We're home!" And then she skipped around me and in the next second had thrown her arms around the stunned doctor.

An exasperated sigh escaped me as I reluctantly followed, but moving slower than she had. "Pixie, perhaps you should start with your name." I smiled apologetically at Carlisle. "Sorry, sir. She gets a little carried away sometimes. This is Alice. I'm Jasper. And as she said, she _thinks_ we're home." Alice turned her head and beamed at me looking from me to Carlisle. Then, looking into her smiling face, I felt like I _was_ home.


	10. Visitors

Okay, so this chapter is a little treat for all my faithful reviewers out there who have generously supported me and given me great suggestions. This chapter is about Alice and Jasper's arrival from Carlisle, Esme, and Rosalie's POV. I hope you enjoy, it was a really fun break to get inside these characters's heads. Next chapter will be back to Alice and Jasper. I just can't stay away from them! Please, keep the reviews coming! Work is really crazy right now but I will try to respond to your reviews very soon!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 10: Visitors

**Carlisle's POV**

"Carlisle!" Esme's voice was tinged with a slight panic. She hadn't yelled but still I'd heard her from my second floor study. In a matter of seconds, I found her standing in the front living room, staring out of the window. I couldn't help but appreciate the view of her from behind in her white sleeveless blouse and black form-fitting pencil skirt. Her caramel colored hair flowed all around her creamy shoulders. My favorite way for her to wear it.

But her posture was all wrong. She was as still as a statue and her arms were wrapped around her waist. She was frightened. But of what? Rose must have also sensed something was wrong as I felt her whip by me in a whirlwind, coming to a perfect stop next to her adopted mother. In the next second, Rosalie snarled and dropped to a defensive crouch.

Something was definitely not right. My first thought was that perhaps Emmett and Edward had returned early from Denali and one of them had been hurt. But with a shake of my head, I dismissed that thought as quickly as it had come. Impossible. Emmett could be reckless at times but with my level-headed first-born son there, I knew Edward would keep him under control, keep him safe.

I quickly moved to Rose's side murmuring reassurances to her. She tended to be the most dramatic of my children, often over-reacting. I usually found myself in the position of pulling her back from the brink. I reached down placing a firm hand on her shoulder but her gaze never strayed from what she was looking at, the topaz of her eyes blazing, her white teeth bared, showing there was more to her than a beautiful face.

I quickly followed her gaze. Perhaps a lost hiker? My unbeating heart dropped to my stomach as I found the objects of Rosalie and Esme's distress. Vampires. Nomads, most probably. Likely they had picked up our scent and traced it to our house (or ice fortress as Emmett liked to tease Esme about her architectural tastes) out of curiosity. Or perhaps to do us harm, claim the territory for their own.

I threw up a silent prayer that for some reason Edward and Emmett were on their way home even if a few days earlier than planned. I was sure Rosalie and I could handle these two on our own if necessary but I hated the idea of fighting or killing any creature. Esme hated fighting worse than I did although I was sure she could hold her own as well. I'd seen the tigress in her on more than one occasion, er, just not while fighting. If Edward were here, he'd be able to read their thought, tell us what their intentions were.

"Rose," I murmured reassuringly, lightly squeezing her shoulder. Looking out the window, I saw the two figures standing still as statues, staring at the house. The female was tiny with dark short-cropped hair. The blonde male was tall, muscular. They were holding hands. Interesting. Typically, even if nomads were mates, they didn't show such signs of affection. Perhaps they were just curious.

Placing my hand under Rosalie's elbow, I gently prodded her to raise to a standing position. I could feel Esme's gaze on me. I was always attuned to here, no matter if we were near each other or not. I met her eyes and saw the fear there. I gave a hint of a smile. "Well, it looks like we have guests. Shall I greet them?" Rosalie began vigorously shaking her head, wordlessly, as if in shock at the very thought.

Esme's brow creased with worry. "Carlisle," she began, her voice breathy. I knew that tone. Whenever she was worried or afraid for us, her voice would get lower, huskier. That quiet voice always brought out my desire to protect her at all costs. I tried to show her with my eyes that it would be okay, that I would keep her safe.

I looked back out on the lawn. Now my brow creased. The tiny vampire and her tall companion were locked in an embrace. Well, if they meant us harm, surely they wouldn't be having a make-out session in front of our house. I crossed to our solid front door, steeling myself for whatever awaited me on the other side. I took a deep breath as my hand grabbed the door knob and turned. Now or never. It was time to see what our visitors wanted.

As I swung the heavy door open the blond male vampire swept his mate behind him, crouching defensively and baring his teeth. A small gasp escaped me as I got my first clear view of him. He had the physique of a fighter. Every inch of his exposed skin revealed a criss-cross pattern of crescent-shaped scars. Vampire bites. He _was_ a fighter. I expected to see the ruby-red eyes of one of our kind. But his were much paler, a rose color. As if diluted by…Impossible!

At that moment, the petite female peeked her head around. I felt my body stiffen in shock. Her eyes were a rich golden color. Like those of my family, thanks to our "vegetarian" diet. "Carlisle?" She called in a sweet sing-song voice. Confusion spread through my brain. She knew my name. I had no time to process what that meant because in the next second, her arms were wrapped tightly around me. "We're home," she breathed in my ear.

My confused gaze met her companion's and he gave me a sheepish look. Almost reluctantly, he began moving toward us. He was speaking but I could barely process what he was saying. Snippets broke through the confused fog in my brain. _Jasper, Alice, home_. They were home? Well, so much for being visitors.

**Esme's POV**

Okay, Carlisle was still in one piece. I had wrapped an arm around Rose. Partly to comfort her, mostly to stop her from doing something rash that would put us in danger. From what the visitors had said, I don't think they meant us harm. Quite the opposite in fact. They seemed to think they belonged here. Well, the girl did anyway. Her mate didn't sound so sure.

I peeked out the door and saw the tiny female with her arms around my husband. She must have felt my presence because she looked over his shoulder, her face lit up with a brilliant smile. I felt my lips curve upward of their own accord. Her countenance was lovely. She looked like a fairy princess. With topaz eyes.

I felt myself take a step backward in surprise. Suddenly, she let go of Carlisle and skipped her way to us, stopping short in front of me and Rosalie. Rose recoiled backward with a look of haughty disgust on her face. Oh, Rose. Trapped in her own sense of self-worth. The fairy creature in front of me smiled shyly, a look of uncertainty now clouding her eyes. I felt an overwhelming urge to pull her in my arms and reassure her that it was okay.

She reached out and grasped both of my hands in hers. She had a strong grip. Especially considering how tiny she was. Instinctively, I knew she meant no harm. I got the feeling she had a difficult time containing her excitement. "Esme." My name escaped her lips like a sigh. "You're Alice?" I sounded much more confident than I felt. "Did someone send you here?" It was the only thing I could think of. Perhaps Tanya, Kate, or Irina. How else could she have the golden eyes of a vegetarian? "Not exactly." She shrugged her shoulders, almost sheepishly, as if embarrassed or uncertain of what to say.

I turned my head searching for Carlisle, confusion blanketing me. He'd stepped inside and the tall blonde companion of Alice (I think I'd heard the name Jasper?) was about a foot behind him. I now saw what had caused Carlisle to gasp. Oh, the poor dear. So many bites, how excruciating! His face did look a little strained. I couldn't help but be warmed by the thought.

He was obviously worried about his Alice. His gaze moving rapidly between Carlisle, Rose, and myself as if assessing any threat we might pose. I was certain he wasn't worried about himself but instead our reaction to his mate. His eyes were a pale red. I felt my compassion for him grow. He hadn't been in our lifestyle long and instinctively I knew that the reason he was in it at all was because of the lovely creature in front of me.

I raised my arm and placed it around Alice's delicate shoulder, gently squeezing. "Well, Alice, Jasper, welcome to our home. We're always delighted to entertain visitors of our kind. We get them so rarely." Alice beamed at me and ever so slightly, I saw Jasper's posture relax. He still looked a little worried but something else was there in his eyes. Relief? Yes, perhaps. Mixed in with a little hope. That was it. This Jasper creature seemed to look a little hopeful. What had this poor soul been through? Well, I had to agree with Alice. They were home now.

As I glanced at Rosalie, I realized she hadn't moved an inch. She was standing there like an incredible marble statue of a Greek goddess. Okay, now we had to convince Rose that they were home. A small sigh escaped my lips. That wouldn't be easy. Change did not come easily for Rosalie.

**Rosalie's POV**

It had finally happened. Esme and Carlisle had lost their damn minds! What were they thinking inviting these two strange visitors into our home, our haven? I'm sure the disgust was written all over my face. I had never been particularly good at hiding my thoughts. It always showed on my face. That was good for Emmett. I loved him desperately but being perceptive was not exactly his strong suit. Brute strength was.

I wished he was here now. He could dispatch with these two in a matter of minutes. As my gazed raked over the male vampire, I reconsidered. Okay, well, maybe a little longer with that one. He'd obviously seen his share of battles. Of course, if Emmett was here, then that would've meant Edward would be here too. Ugh.

A small part of me was glad Edward wasn't here to witness this bizzarro scene. He'd be all smug with his mind-reading and then of course would fall into line with whatever Carlisle and Esme wanted to do, however they wanted to treat our uninvited visitors. He was _never_ on my side. And most of the time, I took extreme delight in that fact. There was another part of me though that wouldn't mind if he was here just so we would know for _sure_ what these vampires' true intentions were.

I was not as eager as Esme to roll out the red carpet just yet. Although the tiny female was cute in her own way. At least she seemed to have some fashion sense. And her grin was a little infectious. But it would take more than that to convince me. I trained my gaze on her mate, never wavering. I wanted him to know _exactly_ what I thought about this. He might have been stunningly handsome if it weren't for all of those hideous scars.

As his gaze met mine, a small crease line appeared between his brows. Immediately, my mind became cloudy and I felt waves of calmness wash over me. Wow, I felt like I didn't have a care in the world. It felt amazing!

Something pricked at the back of my mind. I tried to ignore it but I gasped as it broke through. Oh. My. God. That scarred, red-eyed freak was messing with my mind. Oh, hell no! My teeth clenched and with a shriek of frustration, I growled, "Get. Out. Of. My. Head, you freak!" His surprised gaze met mine and he jerked backward as if I'd physically attacked him.

I bent over and clasped my knees, taking in deep breaths to clear my head. And to stop myself from flying across the room and adding a few more scars to his collection. I looked up and Carlisle and Esme were both looking at me with a mixture of confusion and shock. Carlisle also had that disapproving look he got right before admonishing me. Great. Sometimes I really hated it when he got all father-like on me.

But honestly, he couldn't possibly be mad at me for sticking up for our family with these two freaky visitors! He opened his mouth and said reprovingly, "Rosalie!" Crap. I guess he could. Fine. They could stay. But I didn't have to like it. And I _definitely_ didn't have to be nice.


	11. Monster

Well, this chapter is a little bit of a departure I think from what I've done so far but Alice and Jasper were telling me how it wasn't so easy when they first reached the Cullens. This is how I imagined it went that first night, before Edward and Emmett show up. I think this chapter gives a lot of insight into Jasper (who I love more and more everyday, just like Alice, lol!) I hope you enjoy. I know it's not the chapter everyone was hoping for with Edward but he will be appearing very soon (I've seen it in one of Alice's visions!) This edition goes out to sprinkledwithtwilight whose love of Rose's POV rivals my own! Again thanks to all those who have added me to your faves, it warms my heart and motivates my fingers to type and please review so I can get your feedback, it truly helps!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 11: Monster

**Jasper's POV**

Silvery misty clouds had moved in and dotted the clear black Alaskan night giving an eerie feel to the forest I was looking at from my new room on the third floor of the Cullen home. The floor to ceiling window was facing out over the back of the Cullen property. My arm was resting against the glass and I leaned my head against my forearm.

I breathed a deep breath against the glass and then wrote "Jasper & Alice Cullen" in the fog left there. Almost as quickly, I swiped my hand across, erasing the sentiment. I pushed away from the glass with a disgusted sigh and flopped myself backward onto the oversized feather bed in the middle of the room, throwing my arm across my eyes.

This was Esme's "guest bedroom" as she'd explained to me when she led me here. She'd felt they needed a room for human guests. "Just in case." She'd smiled at me shyly, almost embarrassed at admitting such a fanciful thought as a human visitor. I noticed a charming dimple on one side of her face.

"But now, consider it yours. Do whatever you like to it." She was so sincere and lovely that I felt a lump form in my throat as she squeezed my forearm in a comforting gesture. She turned to leave to give me some privacy to accustom myself to my new surroundings. It'd been a long time since someone had treated me with the kindness a mother would.

I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. She paused but didn't turn around. "Esme?" She turned her head to look at me over her shoulder. "Yes, Jasper?" It took an effort for me to get the words out. "Th-thank you. You've been very kind to Alice and me. I know how strange this must all seem." She smiled indulgently at me. "Jasper, I mean it when I say make yourself at home. I can't explain it but you and Alice belong here. You both belong in our family." Then before I could respond she was gone and I was alone.

With a sigh, I pushed myself up and was sitting on the edge of the bed. I cocked my head to listen for Alice. She was just down the hall from me. I could hear her chattering to Esme, her speech going so fast, even I was having a hard time understanding her.

She was claiming the tower we'd seen reaching up from the roof to the sky as her own. She was going on and on about the breathtaking view. Esme would break in every now and then with a comment about her thoughts when designing it. I found myself smiling in spite of the melancholy that had settled on me since entering my room. Alice's good feelings were obviously having an effect on me.

I had really, _really_ wanted to share a room with Alice. The thought of not being with her every second was causing more pain than it should have. But I'd become accustomed to being in constant proximity to my pixie. Somehow in the short amount of time we had been together, she had become the anchor of my very existence. But there was still enough of the 19th century Texas boy in me to feel funny about staying in the same room as my sweetheart without being married.

As soon as the word "married" flitted across my mind, I shot up off the bed as if it was on fire. And suddenly I could see the whole thing—my pixie in white, tripping down the aisle on Carlisle's arm. I could see me lifting her veil, planting a chaste kiss on her bow-shaped lips. Putting a ring on her finger, MY ring on her finger. Esme beaming at us, Rosalie scowling (I couldn't picture Edward and Emmett since I'd never seen them.)

It was so vivid, you would've thought I'd acquired Alice's ability to have visions of the future. But as suddenly as I saw it, it left me, a dream I couldn't quite hold onto. An impossible dream. Marry another vampire? After knowing them for four days? Besides, I didn't deserve someone as lovely and good as Alice for the rest of my existence. I would only end up ruining it somehow. Of that I was certain.

I know she had faith that I would not slip up, take a human life, be able to live on animals for the rest of my days. But I wasn't so sure. I felt my apprehension double as I thought of the yet to arrive "brothers." Rosalie was not exactly welcoming despite Carlisle and Esme's willingness to take us in. A grim smile touched my lips as I recalled the scene downstairs when she'd called me a freak.

I'd totally deserved it though. Not only because I _was_ a freak and it had been stupid to try and use my power on those Alice hoped would be our "family". The guilt and self-loathing were roiling around inside of me, nearly crushing me. God, I should just leave. Alice had her family now. I didn't think they would harm her.

I brought my hands up and rubbed my face. Maybe I should go for a run, hunt for a while, get rid of some of this tension. I turned and looked out the window longingly, staring at the beckoning forest. I should just go. Now. I could be back before Edward and Emmett, providing protection for Alice if necessary. Just in case they weren't as friendly as Carlisle and Esme.

But something held me back. As if part of me knew that if I walked out that door, I wouldn't come back. All of the unneeded air whooshed out of my lungs at the thought. No more Alice. But it was selfish to want to stay. The Cullens would take care of her.

She didn't need me. I would only cause her pain. Self-discipline had never been a strength of mine. She had no idea how much of a monster I'd been. The thousands of lives I'd destroyed with death and hatred. And when she found out, she surely wouldn't want me to stay with, taint her with my evil. Best to break it off now before either of us were too invested.

I'd made up my mind. I had to go. At that moment I heard Alice gasp in a whisper, "Jasper!" There was a thump from above. The tower room. Edward's former room. Alice had convinced Esme that in her vision, Edward _wanted_ her to have his room. So Esme had generously helped Alice empty the room of Edward's belongings. They had decided to put his things in the garage until he came home and could decide where he wanted to settle. I couldn't imagine he'd be too pleased about that but I knew Alice was damn near unstoppable when she knew what she wanted. He'd get used to it, just like I had.

"Jasper, _please!_ Come here. I need you." She sounded so profoundly sad and broken. I shouldn't. If I saw her, I would never be able to leave. But I wanted to. I had to concentrate to put one foot in front of the other, as if my body was reluctant to obey my brain's commands.

I stepped into the hallway. The stairs leading to the floors below were at my left. To my right was the spiral staircase leading up to Alice's tower. I turned to my left. My foot wouldn't move. "Jasper!" Alice's voice was panicked, desperate. "Please!" Her voice broke. I wheeled around and in two seconds had reached the top of the spiral staircase.

The room was amazing. A circular room made entirely of glass providing a 360 degree view reaching for miles. The ceiling slanted upward coming to a point and was also made of glass, looking high into the heavens. I looked up at the stars with the misty clouds moving over them. I squeezed my eyes shut and swallowed the lump in my throat. I wasn't ready to look at her knowing the instant I did, my resolve would melt.

"You're leaving me?" Her voice as tiny as she was. Frustrated at my weakness, I forcefully pushed the air out of my lungs. Lowering my head, my angry eyes locked with her hurt ones. She was on her knees, in the middle of the room, her arms wrapped tightly around her waist as if keeping herself from coming apart.

I wanted to double over as if someone had punched me in my gut. _I_ was responsible for that hurt, haunted look in her eyes. I hated myself even more. I _was _a monster. She needed to know that. I needed to tell her everything. Then I wouldn't have to leave of my own accord. She would ask me to go. And I could never refuse her wishes. It was time to unleash the monster.

**Alice's POV**

He was leaving me. My future had turned as bleak and as desolate as a desert. Unthinkingly, the words escaped me. "You're leaving me?" I looked at him in shock. The anger in his eyes nearly knocked me over and I gripped my sides tighter to stop from really embarrassing myself by throwing myself at him and begging him to stay.

"But I don't understand. I thought you loved me. I thought you were going to ma-" I stopped myself short. No use in making it any worse by telling him that only moments before I'd been elated when a vision of our wedding had popped in my mind. Okay, so that was stupid. Why would he want to marry a freak like me who couldn't keep her visions straight anyway?

I knew it was too good to be true. To have found my way to a real family, to have found love. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Always trying to re-create a human way of life just because I couldn't remember my own! Why couldn't I just act like a normal vampire and like it?

"I'm not leaving you. But I do need to tell you something and when I'm done, I think you're going to want me to go anyway. And pixie, I'll totally understand and will do whatever you wish." He'd used his nickname for me which I'd come to think of as an endearment. But now it just hurt to hear it. There was nothing about me that was dear to him. He was just looking for a way for me to release him.

I couldn't look at him. I sat back on my rump and pulled my knees tight to my chest as if I could hide that my undead heart was breaking. He was in front of me in a flash and kneeled. He reached out a hand as if to grasp one of mine but then dropped it just as quickly as if thinking better of it. I could feel his eyes on me. I was afraid to look up, not wanting to see that anger that had flashed at me.

"Pixie, please. Look at me. I need to know you're listening, so you'll understand I won't blame you when you ask me to leave." I didn't want to but his deep voice sounded as pained as I felt and I just had to take a peek. I lifted my head, leaned forward and rested my cheek on my knees, my eyes closed. Then I slowly opened them and there he was just inches from me but from the strained look of his face, the pain in his eyes, the tight set of his mouth, he might as well have been miles away from me. I had already lost him.

I could see his Adam's apple bobbing up and down. His reluctance to speak was palpable. My eyes never wavered from his. I wasn't going to let him off that easy. Of course, part of me longed to reach out and nibble that Adam's apple, working my way down until he was begging _me_ to never leave. I smiled a devilish grin at the thought. I was wicked. Why couldn't he see we were perfect for each other? His solid goodness and my wicked games.

His brow creased and his eyebrow shot up as he took in my grin. He looked like he wasn't sure if he wanted to kiss me or shake me. I voted for the former. Suddenly, images began bombarding me. Horrible, terrifying images. Fear tingled down my spine. I gasped and my head shot up. In the next instant, I had launched myself at an unsuspecting Jasper and wrapped my arms around his neck. Tight. No way I was letting go.

My poor, poor Jasper. I knew his past had been terrible. How could I not, seeing his scars for the first time? He'd told me a little of his change, of Maria and her armies. But the magnitude! I'd had no idea. And he was buried under the weight of the guilt, the self-loathing, the hatred of the death and destruction of his past.

He thought of himself as a monster. He didn't think he deserved the love I had for him. He was afraid to love me back. He didn't think he would fit in the Cullen family. He would disappoint them. He would slip. And that would start the whole vicious cycle of self-hatred again, driving him from me. I wasn't a mind-reader like Edward but now that he'd decided to tell me everything I couldn't escape the images as he told me his story.

"Uh, Alice? Are you going to let me up?" His voice was somewhere between amusement and exasperation. I looked into his eyes, our faces barely an inch apart. I smiled and said, "Oh maybe in a million, billion years." He looked at me confused. "Alice." His voice said my name reprovingly. I loved it when he got all major-y on me. "Jasper." I mimicked his tone. Suddenly his arms were around me and he sat up, tucking me across his lap. I think he would've set me away from him but realized there was no way I was unlocking my arms from around his neck.

"I'm serious, Alice. I need to tell you about me. About the monster I am." His eyes were almost puppy dog-like as his forlorn gaze met mine. "Jazz." I whispered, somehow knowing that would capture his attention more than if I yelled at him. I unlocked my arms and placed a hand on either side of his face. "I know. Everything. I saw it when you decided to tell me. Oh Jazz, it's horrible, terrible what you've been through. But don't you understand, I could never hate you, no matter what you do?" I could see the surprise in his eyes, his lips parted and I could tell his breathing rate had increased.

"What? Alice, how could you, kn-?" I cut him off, stroking one of my hands down his cheek, my fingertips tracing the scar patterns. "Haven't you learned yet not to doubt my visions? I know. And as unbelievable as _you_ think this is, I love you even more than I did before."

He smiled sadly and slowly shook his head back and forth. "I don't doubt your visions, pixie. But I do doubt how you can know my sordid, bloody past and still love me. Don't you see now that you're too good for me, that I'll just taint you, take away your happiness?" I smiled back and fingers trailed down and traced the outline of his full lips.

"Jazz, don't you see now that _you're_ too good for me? You're solid and dependable, a fierce protector, a gentleman. That I'm scared to death or un-death that you _will_ really leave me when you learn the extent of my freakdom—er—freakiness—er—that I'm a freak?" A bark of laughter escaped his lips.

Okay, good, he finally realized I was a freak. It still hurt like hell though. "Hell's bells, pixie, what a pair we make." He grinned that charming grin I loved so much. The one that made his scar patterns swirl across his face in a beautiful pattern. I dropped my hands from his face to his shoulders and pushed to lift myself off of him. He was right. I should let him go.

His arms tightened around my waist, squeezing my ribs so hard it hurt. "Where are you going?" He growled playfully. "I'm letting you up. Like you wanted. You win." I could hear the defeat in my voice. "Has it been a million, billion years already? Wow, the time just flies when you're in my arms, pixie." A chuckle rumbled from his chest. I scowled at him but couldn't keep a straight face. I threw my head back and laughed. It sounded like tinkling bells as it bounced off the glass walls.

The laugh died in my throat as I felt his lips on my exposed throat. Lightly he traced his way up, pausing at my mouth. Both of our lips were parted and our breathing uneven. He lightly rubbed his lips against mine, increasing the torture. I wanted to taste him so bad. Never being the most patient, my tongue darted out, tracing his lips as I'd wanted to do earlier when I'd traced them with my fingertips.

He moaned and ever so softly his lips molded to mine. Interesting. I thought he was going to go in for the kill and I'd wanted him to. But for some reason this light feathering of our lips with the occasional dart of the tongue was much more erotic than any of our previous kisses. I never wanted to leave this room. Just as his hand had moved from my back and moved to cup my breast, an image emerged in my mind. Uh-oh. Time to meet the rest of the family. Edward and Emmett were minutes from home.

Reluctantly, I tore my lips from his. He leaned forward as if to capture them again. "Um, Jazz. As much as I hate to say this, we have to stop." His eyes opened and he looked into mine. Wow, I'd never seen such naked lust like that before. At least, not when I was the object of the lust. Thrilling. I shivered slightly.

"What's up?" he asked. A crude joke popped into my head. I giggled at the thought. Edward was the mind-reader, but Jazz must have caught on and just rolled his eyes. With a chuckle, he said, "Besides that. Get your mind out of the gutter, pixie. Although I do like your thinking." Now I was embarrassed, grateful that no blood meant no humiliating blush.

"They're here. Let's go introduce them to their new stepmonsters." Then I jumped up and reached out for his hand. He grasped my hand and pulled slightly to get my attention. He sighed and said resignedly, "Uh, pixie, do me a favor. Play it cool, okay?" Then he slowly pulled me down until my face was an inch from his, wrapping a hand around the back of my head.

"I don't want anything to hurt you now that I've found you." He placed a light kiss on my lips, then pulled back. Staring intently into my eyes, his grip tightened ever so slightly. Then he whispered, "I love you." I smiled softly. "I love you too." We both heard the front door crash open.

Simultaneously a vision of mine and Jazz's wedding flashed through my mind, followed quickly with an image of Edward and Emmett crouched in a defensive posture with Jasper across from them crouching and snarling with such fury that even I was a little scared and I knew what a pussycat he was on the inside.

Oh boy. Now to leash the monster inside to avoid that last scenario. I _really_ wanted a big fancy wedding. But Jasper was going to have to work hard to get me to cage up the monster within me, eager to protect what was most dear to her—Jasper Whitlock—her monster mate.


	12. Introductions

Okay, so this chapter was a struggle for me. I was torn about whose POV to use. Originally, I had always thought I would use Edward's POV and maybe Alice's. But I love Edward SO much and I felt like I wouldn't be able to do him justice. However, every time I sat down to start this chapter, I just kept coming back to him even though I tried about three different character POVs first. I think it turned out pretty okay. As always, please review and let me know if YOU think I did Edward justice. So this edition goes out to AliceJasperIsLove because she loved chapter 11 as much as I did.

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 12: Introductions

**Edward's POV**

Emmett and I had just reached the porch when I heard Carlisle. I don't know how long he'd been speaking to me with his mind as my thoughts had been on what we would find when we got home. I couldn't believe I was thinking it but I was grateful that Tanya had made yet another pass at me causing me to cut our hunting trip short to avoid any further embarrassments to either her or myself.

Emmett and I were in a panic. I'd heard two strange voices in my head coming from the house and Rosalie had been screaming at me about intruders when we were about a mile out. I'd told Emmett there was some possible danger.

I was faster than Emmett and could have gotten to the house even sooner but not sure what we would find when we got there, I figured it was better to keep pace so that my "big" brother would be with me. As a family, we were always stronger when we stuck together, each of us bringing our own unique gifts. And Emmett's was his sheer size and strength. Not bad things to have if there was danger.

I was wary of what we would find wondering if these "intruders" truly meant us any harm. One, Carlisle wasn't warning me they were in danger. Two, I didn't entirely trust Rosalie's version of events. She tended to overreact to everything, particularly if a situation drew attention away from her instead of focusing on her. One of her many "charms" that annoyed the hell out of me. Three, the thoughts of the two intruders were a bit confusing.

I knew there was a male and a female and they were vampires. Alice and Jasper. Those were the names I'd picked up on. The male was the troublesome one with his bloody past and thoughts of newborn vampire armies, a thought that completely flabbergasted me. I'd never imagined such an evil thing. The female had readily accepted his past. Both of those things led me to believe that theirs was a loose alliance that two lonely nomads sometimes formed but no true strong bonds.

But then both of them had thought of a wedding. To each other. And thoughts of love and absolute devotion. Of the magnitude I usually heard from Carlisle and Esme or even Rose and Emmett. Still, with the male's past, I couldn't help but err on the side of caution. Plus, I wasn't sure if I could stomach living in a house with yet _another_ couple in love. Really, there was only so much a single guy vampire could take. I wasn't sure which option was worse.

Emmett was always spoiling for a good fight so I'd debated saying anything, not wanting to cause any trouble if unnecessary, but in the end I decided it was best he be prepared for what we were walking--or running--into as the case may be. Besides, I knew he would never forgive me if something happened to Rose. And as much as a thorn in my side that she was, I'd never forgive myself either if anything happened to her or any other member of our family. They were my life. The only thing that made my miserable existence somewhat tolerable.

"_Edward, you and Emmett be calm. They mean no harm. We'll explain everything when you get here." _Carlisle's reassuring words reached me just as Emmett and I burst through the solid mahogany door, splintering it as if it were made of plywood. Oops. I skidded to a stop, putting out my arm to stop Emmett. I'd braced myself for the collision of his gigantic chest with my solid arm but damn, it still stung as he slammed into it, knocking me a little sideways in the process. "Emmett, wait," I murmured. "Carlisle says it's okay."

Emmett had already crouched and was snarling. I put a hand on his shoulder to steady him. His thoughts were racing. Almost too much to keep up with, but one thought dominated—protecting Rosalie. Emmett was always sure of himself in a fight. The most competitive of our family but also the most fun-loving, he had a tendency to pout if ever bested at anything from arm-wrestling to chess.

At that moment, Carlisle stepped in front of him and placed one hand on Emmett's shoulder and the other on his chest. "Son," his voice soothing. "Relax. They won't hurt us." Emmett stopped snarling but he didn't rise. Then he swiveled his head and I knew he was searching for Rosalie. In an instant, he found her standing by the bay windows at the back of the room. Her eyes flashing in anger, never straying from the two strangers in front of her. _"God, Edward, you're so gullible. Carlisle snaps his fingers and you say how high. Well, remember you'll have no one to blame but yourself when they attack us. WHEN NOT IF! MORON!"_ That was Rose, ever the diplomat.

Surprisingly, the room had a calmness about it, despite Rose's mental yelling, Emmett's defensive crouch, Esme's obvious distress at her broken door. "_That's the fourth one in six months. What am I going to do with these boys? Oh dear, I hope Emmett doesn't do anything rash. I take it back. I'll be so grateful if the only thing that ends up broken tonight is the door. Please. Edward."_ I found her gaze and nodded slightly so she knew I heard her.

I inwardly sighed. Peacekeeper. That ended up being my role more often than not. My ability to hear the thoughts of others (I hated the term "mind-reader." It made me feel like a two-bit sideshow hack.) often gave me the advantage of knowing all of the sides of an issue and facilitating compromise in the family. I couldn't disappoint Esme. That was the worst feeling in the world. Even more so than disappointing Carlisle.

I shook my head slightly to re-focus. I blocked Rose out as best as possible. I needed to concentrate on the strangers before me, read their thoughts for any bad intentions. My mind was a little fuzzier than usual. I wasn't sure if it was because there was so much going on…or maybe had something to do with the calm atmosphere in the room. That definitely wasn't normal. The tension should be thicker than the ice in Glacier Bay.

I quickly scanned the male first. He was the dangerous one. That was obvious upon first glance of him. Criss-cross pattens of newborn vampire bites marring every inch of his skin confirmed my earlier reading of the newborn armies story. So it hadn't been an exaggeration. His posture was stiff but he had a protective arm around the diminutive female beside him. Alice. His gaze was wary and never strayed from Emmett and me. I picked up on the paleness of the red. He hadn't fed on a human in a while.

Hmmm, interesting. For such a fierce past, he actually seemed more—scared wasn't the right word—worried, perhaps? His thoughts were completely concentrated on sending out calm vibes, soothing words, images. It was as if he was going to his happy place? What the hell was that about? Was he trying to mask his true intentions of attack? But he couldn't know I could hear his thoughts so why would he need to hide anything?

Suddenly a strange thought popped into my head. _"Seems to be working. I hate using my influence like this, sending out these calm vibes but I have to protect Alice and I don't know another way. At least one that would prevent violence. This is the best way. I don't want a fight. That Emmett looks big. Besides, Alice would kill me. If he didn't do it first."_ I couldn't help it, I knew a quizzical half-smile touched my face. _He_ was doing this? Keeping the peace in the room but keeping everyone calm? I couldn't wrap my mind around it.

I felt someone staring at me. It was the tiny one. For some reason I was positive her eyes had never left me. I focused my thoughts on her and turned my gaze to her. She was cute, pixie-like. Her eyes were shining bright, brimming with uncontained glee. Golden brown. Vegetarian, like us. No doubt about it she was excitable. She was bouncing slightly up and down on her toes.

"_Hi Edward!"_ Oh my God. Was she speaking to me through her thoughts? I hadn't seen her mouth move and no one else indicated that they had heard anything. That was one of the more annoying things about hearing voices. It was nearly impossible sometimes to keep straight what was actually said aloud. I really had to pay attention to keep from embarrassing myself or revealing too much about my power.

"_I know you can hear me, don't be scared. Jazz and I are here to join your family, not hurt anyone."_ Her gaze still had some laughter in it but it was also really intense as if she was trying to burn the concept into my brain. _"Wow, this is actually kind of fun! Okay, I want to try something, but don't freak out."_ I inclined my head slightly to let her know it was okay.

Then I was bombarded with images. It was my family. We were living in a different house, one we hadn't lived in for decades. We were in Forks, Washington. And Alice and Jasper were firmly ensconced in the family. Our clothes indicated that this was in the future since it wasn't the fashion of this era and didn't look like anything from before. And for one second there was a glimpse of a girl. A human girl, with long dark hair and chocolate brown eyes.

But then she was gone and it was as if Alice had shut off her train of thought. _"Edward, you can read minds. What I just showed you, that hasn't happened yet. I have visions. Of the future. That's how I knew to find Jasper. It's how I knew about your family and that Jasper and I were to become a part of it. Do you understand now?"_ She was nodding her head at me in a reassuring gesture.

I turned to look at my family. Carlisle had his arm around Esme and she was leaning her head against his chest. She had that maternal love look going that she normally had when she was proud of one of her "kids" in some way. I wasn't sure if it was directed at me or more that she was just proud that none of us had destroyed any of her Chippendale living room furniture yet. Carlisle's eyes were questioning as were his thoughts. He wanted to know what I'd seen.

Emmett had stood and had Rosalie halfway behind him. She had her head peeking around one of his broad biceps, contempt showing on every inch of her face, but her eyes betrayed a bit of the uncertain thoughts she was having. She was starting to think that maybe Alice and Jasper truly didn't mean harm since I hadn't attacked yet and as moronic as I was, I'd never allow the family to be hurt. High praise indeed coming from Rose. I couldn't resist giving her a little smirk. She screamed in frustration in her mind and hissed at me.

"Everyone, I'd like to introduce you to the newest members of our family—Alice and Jasper." I kept my tone even, calm, but firm. I wanted them to know that this was for real. Esme lit up and Carlisle smiled too, his posture almost sagging slightly with relief. Emmett, never the deepest pool when it came to thoughts, instantly turned to thinking of all the competitions he could best beat his new "brother" at.

I couldn't help but grin. You could always count on Emmett to accept things the easiest. That's probably why it was good he and Rose were together. He helped balance her near inability to accept change. Rose was still fuming but more at me than Alice and Jasper. She would never admit it but there _was_ a part of her that was a little excited at the prospect of having a sister. I hoped Alice liked shopping. Rosalie was planning a big excursion for next week.

I felt a tiny hand slip into mine and squeeze. I glanced down and Alice was grinning at me, her eyes dancing with excitement and happiness. She reached up and gave me a kiss on the cheek and whispered in my ear, "Thanks—brother. This is going to be great. You'll see!" Then she giggled and I couldn't help but smile back. But then I caught the thought in her mind.

I jerked back in surprise, ripping my hand from hers. I crossed my arms over my chest, glared at her and growled through clenched teeth, "_You stole my room!?"_ I was suddenly hit by two voices. Two guilty voices. One my mother's and one my newest sister. I reached up and pinched the bridge of my nose, so furious I couldn't even look at them. _"And you moved my things to the garage!?_" The only thing I could hear through my fury was Emmett's braying guffaw and Rosalie's taunting thoughts. _"Serves you right. Idiot. Still happy about our newest addition to the family?"_ I didn't have to look at her to see the haughty smirk on her face.

The garage. Wow. I _really_ hated being the single one. This dainty little vision-seeing pixie had everyone fooled. No doubt about it. She was pure evil. I sighed letting my frustration have a voice.

She was bombarding me with images of me forgiving her, me settling into the large sun room at the back of the house, moving my grand piano in there, realizing that the acoustics were better than any other room in the house and being grateful for that now that I was in the house with three madly in love and in lust couples.

I looked down at her and she was grinning at me. I smiled back and gave her a light punch on her upper arm. No doubt about it. I was going to enjoy every minute of having as big a freak as me as part of the family. And then I knew. We were going to be great friends.


	13. Siberia

So I guess by now, you've guessed that I just can't stay away from Jasper. This chapter is all about him. It was actually pretty hard to write. I think I am really caught up in his struggle. Thank goodness, I know he has good things in store for him. Now I know how Alice feels trying to get through the hard times! So I just want to say a huge thank you to all of you who have added me to your favorites, it is truly an honor! Also to my faithful reviewers, you guys keep rocking the casbah! I'm sorry my schedule hasn't allowed me to write as much or respond to all of my reviewers but your reviews mean SO much to me!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 13: Siberia

**Jasper's POV**

Maybe I could just keep running. Hit the Bering Strait and just keep going until I hit Siberia. I could live on polar bears. And…well, if the occasional human went missing, who would notice? Besides, wasn't Siberia where people were banished to? I could just banish myself. I was running straight in to the furious wind that was howling all around me and would have frozen a human in their tracks. Of course, on my smooth marble-hard skin, it could have been a balmy tropical breeze for all I knew.

I was darting around trees and jumping over boulders through the forest behind the Cullen home. My gut tightened at the thought of the Cullens. I could still see the horror on sweet Esme's face, the look of disgust on Rosalie's. Emmett had looked skeptical while Edward had been an implacable mask, devoid of any emotion. Carlisle had been the hardest to take. His eyes had shown nothing but compassion. Not the slightest inkling of a buried disgust. As if he understood my struggles. As if the story I had just told them made no difference in his opinion of me.

It was all Alice's fault. I hadn't wanted to tell them. But there she'd been encouraging me, rubbing her hand along my bicep in what I suppose was a comforting gesture, her gaze never wavering from my face, silently urging me to reveal myself to these strangers. I had trained newborns, kept them in line, caused miles of mayhem and destruction but nothing caused me to buckle quicker than when Alice wanted to me to do something. I caved instantly, I'd sell my soul, if I still had one, whatever it took to make her happy.

Of course, a small part of me knew I needed to tell them. Especially if we were going to be living together as one big family. Which I still hadn't been entirely sure of. But Alice was. She was convinced we both had to tell our stories. Thing was, here wasn't near as long and bloody as mine. And there was nothing like setting a roomful of vampires on edge.

Thank goodness for my ability. Otherwise I probably would've never gotten a word out.

Then again, I would've never gotten a word out.

And maybe I'd be holding Alice in the tower room, looking up at the stars. Or finding some way for us to kill time. But I had gotten the words out and they echoed through my head.

_I was barely eighteen when the change happened but I'd been a soldier for two years already and had seen more death than anyone my age should have. I'd gotten lucky in battle and for some reason was able to draw people to me, lead them and had achieved the rank of major._

_And then I'd met them one moonlit night. Lucy, Nettie. And Maria. I don't have to tell you what happened. Maria had already been building her armies and saw something in me. So I was the first of her soldiers to make it past the newborn stage. We were together for decades and I used my ability to control the newborns. Well as best as a newborn can be controlled and of course the result was the destruction, death and mayhem that I was responsible for and that Maria reaped the rewards of. And when they'd outlived their purpose, I made sure the newborns were destroyed. Many of these battles can be seen on my skin even today. An outward sign of my crimes. _

_But it was overwhelming, my emotions getting the better of me. Maria couldn't understand. She reveled in her power as a vampire whereas I found myself in a melancholy that I could never shake. Eventually, one of my few comrades to survive, Peter, found a mate with one of the newborns set for destruction. Charlotte. I let them escape. Maria was furious. I knew then that her feelings for me had changed from one of need, a need for my powers, to one of pure hatred. I knew my days would be numbered. She would be looking to take me out._

_Oddly, despite the number of years together, the fact that she was my maker, I felt no regret in my decision to leave her. Of course, I'd had no desire to destroy her either. I don't know why but I was driven to see if I could find another life away from the southern vampire armies. One in which I wouldn't have to take on the emotions of hatred, fear every single day of my existence. _

_So I'd headed north to find Peter and Charlotte and to discover a different life. But I found that I still had to take life to live. And those humans still felt the intense emotions of one whose life was in danger and it took its toll. I'd just decided to strike out on my own when I ran into Alice. And here I am. If you don't want me around I understand. I've taken more lives than all of you combined a thousand times over. I've committed the sin of killing our own kind for another's personal gain. All for the reward of as many humans as I wanted to consume. So you see, it's not an exaggeration when I say I'm a monster. I'm a million times personified the stereotype of the evil vampire. _

As my words trailed off, I'd looked up and seen the faces that matched all of the feelings that were inundating me. So many of them and such strong visceral feelings that even I couldn't manipulate them. They came too fast, too furious. That's when I'd had to get out of there.

I'd shot like a rocket off of Esme's dainty Chippendale sofa, knocking it and Alice crashing into the wall behind us. In three seconds flat, I had ripped open the French doors leading to the backyard and on into the stretching forest. My only thought had been escape. Yep, that was me, fight or flight. Bet Alice hadn't counted on that. I'd chosen flight. That split second decision had given me a jump on Alice. I was sure she'd be on my heels any minute.

Despite the light snow that had just begun to fall, I felt hot, as if I still had blood. And it was boiling. I was so angry with myself for even thinking for a millisecond that I could become a part of a family, could have a life with Alice. A feral snarl of frustration built deep in my chest and echoed in the trees around me.

And then I caught the scent…sweet, pure. Human. And in a flash, I'd completely wheeled around and was following the scent, completely taken over by my hunting instincts. I allowed those instincts to rule my every thought, my every movement. There was no use in being good. Now that the Cullens knew all about my monstrous past, I might as well live up to the image.

I was close now, maybe a quarter of a mile from where I would find my prey. Probably some poor unlucky hiker. With every sense trained on the hunt, I never saw it coming. Or should I say her. One minute the wind was whipping by my face, the next minute, I was struck full in the back, the impact clapping like thunder.

And then I was facedown in the snow bank. Luckily I didn't need oxygen since my mouth was full of the cold, wet stuff. The slight weight had not moved from my back. Turning my head to the side, I spit out a mouthful of snow and growled. "Alice."

Suddenly, she was stretched out along my back and her cheek rested against my cheek. My arms were stretched out in front of me, an automatic reaction when I'd been falling, and she matched her arms to mine, entwining our fingers.

"Jasper." She breathed in a half-sigh, half-whisper. I could feel my body involuntarily reacting to the delightful feel of her body on top of mine. I could easily have thrown her off and continued my pursuit of my unseen but delicious-smelling quarry. But I didn't want to. Monster, yes. Crazy, no.

She was breathing hard, her breath tickling my ear and sending electric currents down my spine. She must have run at a hell of a speed to have caught up with me. "Alice, let me up." I needed to get some distance from her. She completely clouded my judgment anytime she was within fifteen feet of me. Oh, hell's bells, who was I kidding? I couldn't think straight if she was on the same continent as me. Which is why Siberia still sounded pretty damn good.

"Are you going to run away from me again?" I could feel her lips caressing my earlobe as she spoke. And at that moment there was no way I'd run from her. Of course, my pride was more than a little pricked. So no way I was letting my little tackler know what effect she had on me. "Dammit Alice, I wasn't running away. I just needed a…a…a break."

Her hands tightened on mine and I heard and felt her sharp intake of breath. Stupidly, I thought she did so in surprise. Then in a low measured tone, colder than the snow I was laying in, she muttered, "Just how big of an idiot do you think I am, cowboy?" Then I felt a knee dig in my back. Uh-oh. She wasn't surprised. She was…mad!

My sweet little pixie was angry! Now she had both knees in my back and she'd let go of my hands. As she hopped to her feet, she used the back of my head for leverage, burying my face even further into the snow drift with her tiny hand. I jumped to my feet, spluttering and ran a hand over my face, wiping the snow away.

When I opened my eyes, she was standing in front of me, fists on hips, eyes flashing. I felt the urge to laugh but caught it at the last minute, turning it into an awkward cough. I don't think she would have appreciated me telling her how utterly irresistible she looked when she was mad.

"I _saw_ you." Her tone was accusatory, the words fairly spit at me. Wow, I had never seen her like this. Happy, excited, bubbly, yes. Even hurt, sad, confused. Angry? Not even close. And frankly, I'd never wanted her more. Thank God for my freezing cold wet jeans.

She took a step toward me and then the words spilled out of her in a torrent of anger. And actually, if I was honest with myself, there was a teeny, tiny part of me that was actually scared of her. She looked like an avenging angel. "You listen to me Jasper Whitlock. I have been patient and understanding. And kind when you would let me. I've given you your space, even though I really wanted you to move into the tower with me. I've shown you the life we were meant to live. I've give you my kisses and touches and most of all my heart."

Each word was punctuated by a strong jab of her index finger into my chest. It didn't hurt exactly, but I can't lie, it was probably going to leave a mark. I reached up and grabbed her finger. She tugged but I wouldn't let go, instead snaking my hand up to cradle her whole hand and then moved up to her forearm and slowly pulled her to me. "Easy, love." I tried to say it soothingly but it came out a little gruffly. The way my voice always sounded when her body was touching mine.

I felt the guilt now. I'd nearly lost my control. If she hadn't stopped me…

I couldn't stay here but I couldn't be without her either. "Alice. Please. Come with me. Let's go. Just you and me. We don't need anyone else." I knew my eyes were pleading with her. It suddenly seemed like the perfect solution. We could just wander, reveling in each other's company. It was so easy with Alice. I felt like I could be myself and that was enough.

She looked at me in surprise, her eyes slightly widened, and then the anger was replaced by sadness. "I can't." She whispered. "This is where I belong." She brought her hand up and cupped my cheek. Involuntarily, I leaned into her caress, like a thirsty man who was offered a drink of water. "I wish you could believe it's where you belong to. Jasper, if you just gave them a chance…" Her voice trailed off. Slowly she pulled herself up and then lightly placed her lips against mine, the softest, briefest of brushes. She was saying goodbye. And my unbeating heart shattered into a million pieces.

She pulled back and now my hand came up, the back of my knuckles grazing against her smooth porcelain cheek. "Oh pixie," I sighed. I leaned down and kissed her hard, quick, intense. "I can't. Or rather, I don't think they can give me a chance." She opened her mouth and I placed my finger over her lips. She snapped them shut. "It's okay. I never really expected them to." I mouthed to her 'I love you' but no sound came out. It was as if everything inside me had frozen up. I turned on her stricken face and took off in a northeasterly direction. Siberia couldn't come fast enough. And damn it to hell, it probably wouldn't be far enough either.


	14. Family

Wow, so now I know that cliffhangers really provoke some strong reaction, lol! Sorry dear readers, but this chapter doesn't completely satisfy your questions after the last one. This chapter in some ways is my feeble effort to establish the bond between Alice and Edward and Alice and the rest of the family. I think it's kind of poignant and while not perfect, I still kind of really like this chapter (although I am just as anxious as you to get back to the romance between Alice and Jasper!) I hope you enjoy. So this chapter goes out to oncesakura for encouraging me with some powerful words and as always, to each and every one of my faithful reviewers. Please keep reviewing! I don't know what I'd do without you!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 14: Family

**Edward's POV**

He was a jackass. Or a dumbass. Or both. To have left Alice like that in the middle of the forest. What was he thinking? She was broken, devastated. By the time I got there she was nearly catatonic. Her thoughts were not coherent. Most of them were shrouded in shock, disbelief, desolation.

I was getting snippets of their conversation from her. He thought we didn't approve of his past, that we wouldn't be able to accept him. Idiot! I could tear him apart! And not because I was scared of what he'd do to our family. Instead that he'd bolted without giving us a chance to absorb his story. But most of all for putting Alice in the position of having to choose. Choose between him and her new life with us. Her family. Her first real family.

In the short time that Alice and I had been in each other's company, she and I had shared a lot using our unique gifts. It'd been quite refreshing for me, to have someone who understood the mind-numbing responsibility of gifts like ours, of never really being able to escape from others.

Although she hadn't specifically articulated it, her thoughts were always permeated by her desire to belong, fit in, to be a part of a life she couldn't remember and had never known. She was an incredibly beautiful creature, not just physically, but on the inside. I couldn't help but already feel protective of her, as a brother would for a sister. Rose had never really fit the bill in that department, much more preferring to focus on the antagonistic aspect of sibling rivalry, ever jealous of my connection to Carlisle and of course the fact that I seemed to be the one creature in existence who could resist her physical charms.

But Alice…her thoughts were so pure, she was so full of life and despite her lonely existence up to this point, her hellish beginning, she had an optimism that was fascinating to me. I was not particularly inclined to be an optimistic being with a yawning eternal existence in front of me, and never having experienced that all-consuming love that Carlisle and Esme had or even Rose and Emmett to an extent. And to top it all off to know that I had no soul. Carlisle wasn't so convinced of that but knowing the monstrous things I'd done, the constant fight to keep from doing more…well, let's just say I found it hard to agree with him.

Which brought me back to focus on Jasper. Sure some of what he'd told us was disturbing but honestly, did he not realize we all had our pasts? That none of us were perfect? Even Carlisle, while never taking a human life per se, had changed us without the choice to, uh, not be changed. Not that I didn't still love him as a father. Still, Jasper needed to understand that all of us unleashed the monster at times, willingly or not. We all had the struggle of fighting against our nature. But that's why he belonged here. With us. With Alice.

Alice's mind screamed out in pain. _JASPER! _I winced at the agony she was in. There was no time to waste. I knelt down and slid my palm down her face, trying to draw her attention. "Alice." I whispered. She was staring at nothing. "Come on. I need to get you back to the house." I gripped one her balled-up fists in mine and gave a gentle tug.

"It's okay. Let's go. We'll find him." She still didn't look at me. There was no recognition in her thoughts, only pain, fear, and Jasper. Even now with Jasper having left her, her only thoughts of him were worry, fear for what would happen to him, how he'd feel if he slipped, fear that she'd lost him forever. Devastation that he didn't love her enough, that she hadn't been able to love him enough for the both of them.

I blew out a sigh of frustration. Okay, this had to stop. I scooped her up in my arms and took off for the house. I'd leave her with Esme. And then I'd track Jasper down, make him listen to reason. And if he wouldn't listen to reason, well, I'd just have to drag him back if for no other reason than he made Alice happy and I wanted my sister to have all that she deserved. He didn't have too much of a jump on me. I should hopefully be able to catch him before he got too far.

As I got to the back door, Esme was already there to greet me. She'd obviously been standing watch, scanning worriedly for our return. "_Edward?_" She didn't speak aloud. Over the decades my family had become accustomed to conversing with me with their minds. "Jasper's gone." My voice was terse. I transferred Alice to Esme's waiting arms and in a blur, she whirled and had Alice on the couch, stroking her hair, murmuring comforting words to her. Nothing like a family crisis to put Esme in full mothering mode.

The rest of my family was scattered around the living room, their thoughts and faces showing various degrees of shock…concern…confusion. I didn't blame them. It was a hell of a lot to absorb between Jasper and Alice's arrival, his story, his abrupt departure, the unbelievable sight of full-of-life Alice nearly, well, lifeless. I looked at Carlisle. His gaze met mine, steady but worried. "I'm going after him. I'll make sure he understands where the family stands on the matter." Carlisle nodded in agreement.

At my words, Alice jolted straight up, swiveling her head to find me. "I'm going with you." Her voice was hard, determined. No hint of the usual sing-song lilt I'd come to recognize as both her speaking voice and mind voice. It made me feel a little bereft. "Alice, honey…" Esme was rubbing her back soothingly. I cut Esme off. "No." I was just as determined. Her eyes blazed. Well, at least she had some life back in her.

_YES!_ She yelled at me with her mind. Whoa, she was a little fearsome when she was mad. I set my jaw. I wasn't going to let her bully me, I was twice her size for goodness sake! She continued, "_He needs me. He doesn't know you. He'll be scared and feel cornered. I couldn't stand it if something happened. To either of you._" Just as I was about to argue with her the blank look was back in her eyes.

The images that flashed in her mind were now flickering across mine. She was having a vision. Jasper was nearly to Denali. On his way to Siberia. Siberia! My lips upturned slightly at the thought. Really, did he think Siberia would be far enough to keep Alice away? Damn fool. And then I saw me catching up with him. Alice was nowhere in sight.

I moved to her side and gripped her hand. She shook her head as if clearing it and then looked at me as if seeing me for the first time. The sadness was still there. I swallowed convulsively but kept my steady gaze on hers. "Edward." She whispered aloud. "Please. Bring him home. Bring him back to me. To us. I don't know why but it has to be you."

I felt a flash of temper rise up in me. She didn't deserve this. I'd bring him back in one piece but I didn't have to bring him back without a mark. "I swear to you. He will return to you. Whether he likes it or not. You are _both_ part of this family now. And we do anything we must for our family." I squeezed her hand, spun around in a flash and was gone before she could say another word.

The search was on. He couldn't outrun his past. And I'd be damned if he outran me.

**Alice's POV**

Edward was gone. I hoped I'd shown him enough of my vision that he knew exactly where to find Jasper. _Jasper!_ I bent over and grasped my stomach as if I was about to be sick. My shattered heart would never be whole again. Esme stroked my back. "Alice? Are you okay?" A mirthless laugh escaped my lips.

Okay. Such a funny word. No, I had the feeling I would never be okay again. At least not until Edward brought Jasper home. If he would come. I shook my head slowly. He would. He just had to. I hadn't seen any further than Edward finding Jazz. I couldn't be positive he'd return to me. In fact, I really didn't hold out much hope.

I turned to look at Esme. Her brow furrowed deeper I suppose at the bleakness she saw in my face. "Not really." I shrugged what I hoped looked nonchalantly. I noticed that Emmett had sat down in an oversized captain's chair that would have dwarfed a normal man. Rose had perched herself on the arm of the chair, her feet resting on Emmett's massive thigh, his arm draped casually across her knees.

I felt my heart twist at the sight. They obviously had a strong connection. I remembered how he'd put himself between her and Jazz and me when he first arrived. Protecting her. Like Jasper had promised to do for me. And then he'd left. He'd been the one to hurt me far worse than anything that could have been done to me physically. I still couldn't believe it.

I looked away from Rose and Emmett quickly, and saw Carlisle was standing in front of the window directly in front of me. His eyes were filled with such compassion and they were piercing right through me. I felt as if he was seeing all the ugly thoughts I was having. About myself, about Jasper, about him. I didn't deserve his compassion. I'd brought this on myself. For believing that this would work out. That I'd found someone who could love me in spite of my freakish shortcomings.

Guiltily, I looked down at my entwined fingers. I noticed that I was twisting them and untwisting them in an unconscious gesture. It was strange how I seemed to not even really be there. I was pretty sure that whoever I was died when Jasper left. I didn't think I could be whole again until he came back. I understood the concept of the phrase "the better half" now when people talked about their soul mates.

When I looked up, I realized that they were all staring at me, concern on their faces. They were worried about me. It dawned on me then, not because they were afraid I might do something to them, but because they genuinely cared about my happiness. Even Rosalie had concern in her eyes. I knew she wasn't completely without a heart!

And then just a little of my frozen heart thawed. They cared about me because they considered me a part of their family now! I couldn't believe it. It was just what I had hoped for, longed for. I gave them a small shy smile and spoke, "I'm sorry if I worried you. It was just a bit of a shock, the way Jasper left like that. I wasn't really expecting his reaction. I hope you understand that he ran because he was afraid you would reject him. Because of his past. It has nothing to do with any of you or your hospitality you've shown us so far."

Carlisle moved forward and crouched in front of me. Grasping both of my hands in his firm grip. "We know that Alice. Don't worry. We don't blame him for any of it. But we also don't like to see you in such pain. We just want to help. Both of you. Tell us how we can do that." His sincerity brought a lump to my throat and I found it difficult to swallow. I'm sure if I could cry, tears would have been streaming down my face like a roaring river.

I squeezed his hands. "You already are. All of you. Just being here, supporting me…well, it's more than I deserve, more than I could ask for." Esme put a supportive arm around me, patting my shoulder comfortingly. "Oh my dear! Of course you deserve it. You're a lovely woman and you deserve only good things. And, we are so happy to have you here, a part of our family now. You and Jasper." She smiled sweetly at me and I involuntarily felt my lips go up in response. I glanced nervously at Emmett and Rose. They'd been so quiet this whole time.

Emmett was grinning at me, "Yeah, sis. It's going to be great to have a little sister around to tease. You'll find out that torturing siblings is one of my specialties." Rosalie rolled her eyes and then looked at me. She didn't smile exactly, but she didn't look as mean as when we first met either. "Maybe we didn't start off on the best foot, but I do love those boots you're wearing which leads me to conclude that you have excellent fashion sense. Maybe you and I can plan a little shopping excursion once Edward and Jasper get back. A sort of welcome to the family wardrobe provided courtesy of our loving and financially supportive father Carlisle." Then she had a hint of a smile as she raised her eyebrows and looked at Carlisle. Carlisle did a little eye roll of his own but smiled warmly and said, "Whatever you girls want."

Then he turned his gaze back on me. "You see Alice, there's no escape now. You are a Cullen. You're family. And you have no need to worry because Jasper will soon be home as well. Edward can be very persuasive when he wants to be. Have faith." Then he stood up and looked around at the rest of the family. Everyone was nodding in agreement.

The warmth that had started to thaw my heart was in full force now. While I couldn't say that it was completely thawed (that would never happen until Jasper was back in my life), it was beginning to fill up again. So this was what it felt like to be part of a family. I should have done this ages ago and I put my arm around Esme and squeezed while grinning goofily at the rest of my family.


	15. Bonding

Dear readers, ask and you shall receive. Jasper reappears in this chapter! I, like you, am always anxious for my dear Jasper to be around! He's just so darn fun to write! And well, this chapter features my two men, so it couldn't get better for me! At least, not until Jasper and Alice are back together again, lol. So again, thank you to all of my faithful reviewers, I could not do this without you! And a special shout-out to my very own "Alice", AliceSteepedInSadness who has returned, missed you girl, glad you're back! Also, a big welcome to Faerie0975 and her incredible words of kindness! Stay tuned for the next chapter, I think it will be a woo-hoo doozy!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 15: Bonding

**Jasper's POV**

I didn't know how long I'd been running. Could've been a day, could've been a year. Time had no meaning for me anymore. Okay, well maybe not a year because I was still in Alaska, somewhere in Denali National Park. Hadn't even made it to the Bering Strait yet.

It still wasn't far enough to escape that last memory of hurt and devastation in Alice's eyes. The way her heart-shaped face had crumpled…my stomach clenched at that memory that was now burnt in my brain, for eternity I was sure. Not only that image, but I'd _felt_ those emotions from her, probably more intensely than anything I'd felt in the last century. And that was saying a lot considering how many beings I had destroyed over the years.

It'd taken every ounce of strength to leave her. I hadn't stopped running since. I knew if I did, I wouldn't be strong enough to stay away from her. The one thing that kept me going was knowing the Cullens would take care of her. Of course, my first choice would have been for her to come with me. I couldn't lie to myself, my heart had been ripped out of my chest when she'd turned me down.

But deep down I hadn't been surprised. It'd been hard for me to believe that we'd really end up together. Despite all of her assurances to the contrary, I knew I was no good for her. I wouldn't be any good for the Cullens either. One slip-up and I would endanger the life they'd built for themselves.

Christ, what was I thinking? I'd nearly done that very thing in the woods behind their house. My throat went up in scorching flames at the memory of the human scent I'd caught there. Just because of the memory! See? I was a weak-willed creature. I should probably feed. It'd been awhile. No one was watching. If I could find a human, they could be my next meal. No one to worry about disappointing.

Then I skidded to a stop as if hitting a brick wall as a realization hit me. But I _would_ be disappointed. In myself. And the burning sensation disappeared. I was still hungry but suddenly finding a bear to feed on didn't sound so bad. And if I didn't mind feeding on animals, then maybe there was a chance I could go back, face Alice and the Cullens, be the man she thought I could be…just as quickly I dismissed the thought. Hell's bells, so I made the right choice _this_ time. Who's to say I'd make it again the next time? No, best to stick to my plan. But I still needed to feed, get some strength for the rest of the long journey ahead of me.

I inhaled a deep cleansing breath of the cold Alaskan air, searching for some possible prey. Whoa. I made a quick 360 degree turn. There was a vamp in the area. I went into a defensive crouch and inhaled again attempting to pinpoint what direction it was coming from. I caught another whiff and it seemed vaguely familiar. They had to be close, maybe three quarters or a half mile away.

Why did it smell so familiar? Someone I knew? It definitely wasn't Alice. Her scent was branded into every molecule of my being. I knew it better than I knew myself. A bitter disappointment swept through me. I had to admit that there was a part of me that had hoped my pixie would chase me down. I had daydreamed about it maybe one or two million times on my trek across Alaska. Dreamed that she'd decided she couldn't live without me. That, like me, she was addicted to our kisses and had to track me down to get her fix.

A blur in the corner of my eye caught my attention and all daydreams vanished. I let out a snarl and faced the blur head-on. The blur came to a stand-still at my movement. And there we were facing each other, probably a hundred yards apart. He was standing still as a statue, palms raised as if in surrender. A hint of a smile touched my lips. Once a soldier, always a soldier. I slowly rose to a stance out of my defensive crouch, coming to attention, standing ramrod straight.

"Hello Jasper." He didn't yell. He didn't have to. I heard him as if he were standing next to me. "Edward." I couldn't get a feel for what he was feeling at the moment. I'd noticed in the short amount of time I'd spent in his company that Edward was very difficult to read in regard to his emotions, different from the intense Rosalie or easy-going Emmett. He seemed to be able in some way to compartmentalize his emotions, keeping such control over them that they weren't conveyed, even to someone who could sense those things.

So that was the only thing that made me nervous. Was he angry? Or was he here to warn me to stay gone? Of course, a part of me hoped he was here to bring me back at Alice's request. But that was the _least_ likely of any possible reason. Well…not knowing why he'd tracked me down, no way was I making the first move!

"Can I come closer? I promise to be civilized." Edward's smooth-as-velvet voice pierced my musings. "I'd like to tell you why I'm here." Damn, forgot about the whole mind-reading thing. "All right. But I don't think it'll change matters." I drawled, trying to sound nonchalant. Trying to tamp down any hope that was springing up in my breast. It was true. No matter the reason he'd looked for me, it didn't change the fact that I was a monster and undeserving of Alice's love or that I could put his family at risk if I ever slipped.

"You couldn't be more wrong." Edward was about two feet in front of me. His topaz eyes burning bright despite the cool tone of his voice. "Really?" My brow shot up as I stared back. "Well then, enlighten me, dear _brother_." This ought to be good, I thought to myself as I crossed my arms over my chest, and tried to erase any incriminating thoughts about Alice from my mind. He cocked a half-smile at me and raised a brow of his own. "Thanks, I think I will. _Brother._"

**Edward's POV**

I finally caught him halfway across Denali. Just like Alice had shown me. I knew he'd be defensive so I'd stopped about a hundred yards away, putting a little distance between us. After all, I'd promised Alice to bring him back in one piece.

My lips curved upward as I heard his thoughts. Well, nice to know he couldn't always sense my emotions. I couldn't imagine how frustrating it would be to be around someone resistant to my ability. But it was nice to know he wasn't always able to invade my space.

He was going through all of the possible reasons I could have for tracking him down. He was confused, wary…no way he was making the first move. Luckily, I was a master peacemaker, thanks to years of practice. Holding my hands up in a conciliatory gesture (a move I figured the soldier in him would recognize), I spoke first in what was hopefully a calm, soothing voice. "Hello Jasper."

"Edward," he returned. He seemed calm so it would probable be okay if I got a little closer. I noticed his rigid posture and decided that maybe I should ask first. It was the polite thing to do. And might save a body part or two. It could help too just to let him know I was only here to talk.

"Can I come closer? I promise to be civilized. I'd like to tell you why I'm here." He took a slight step backward as if surprised. I had to bite back a chuckle when his thought flashed across my mind. He'd let his guard down, forgetting I knew what he was thinking. I loved it when that happened. This might be easier than I'd thought.

"All right. But I don't think it'll change matters." I could hear his Texas twang. I had noticed it was more pronounced when he was trying to act nonchalant. I was in front of him in a flash. "You couldn't be more wrong." My voice had a bit of an edge but honestly, he was acting like a stubborn ass. "Really?" His brow shot up as he stared me down. "Well then, enlighten me, dear _brother_."

He crossed his arms over his chest and he started reciting the state capitals in his mind. He was obviously trying to keep me from hearing his thoughts. Probably thoughts about Alice. He wasn't the first to try and use such tricks to keep me out. I half-smiled and raised a brow of my own to show him I knew what he was trying to pull. "Thanks, I think I will. _Brother._" Okay, maybe this wasn't going to be as easy as I'd thought.

"First, I want you to know that I'm not here to make you do anything you don't want to do. But I do think it's important for you to hear me out. Then, if you decide you still want to move on to Siberia and you think that will really be far enough to escape Alice, then by all means go. I won't stop you." His skepticism was screaming at me from his body language to his thoughts.

Still, he was going to listen. He was thinking of Alice. He wanted to be with her, no doubt about that. His devotion and protectiveness of her was truly staggering. And he was an idiot. He really believed she was better off without him.

I felt a small twinge. Actually, I could kind of sympathize with the big idiot. His thoughts tended to run toward the whole "I'm-such-a-terrible-monster-I-don't-deserve-a-family" kind of vein and I could definitely relate. He didn't know that I'd had my own adolescent rebellion at one time, abandoning Carlisle's vegetarian lifestyle. It'd been hard to come back, admit my mistakes but I was glad I had.

He was really wallowing in the self-pity and loathing now, thinking about the toll killing humans had started to take on him thanks to feeling all of the emotions. Hearing that, I realized that he might have a chance to make it in our lifestyle after all. Also, he and I seemed to have some things in common. Maybe if I could get him to see that then he might also see that he could have other things in common with the rest of us.

"You know, Jasper, it might surprise you to hear that I didn't always follow Carlisle's lifestyle." His eyes widened slowly but other than that he showed no reaction. "I went my own way for about ten years. Of course, I couldn't completely abandon Carlisle's beliefs so I looked for humans who were monsters in their own right."

I could see the curiosity in his eyes. I half-smiled at the question he directed my way. I wasn't sure if he was aware that he hadn't said it aloud. See, he was already acting like a Cullen. "I stopped because I could hear their thoughts, their last moments of terror, pain. _I_ started to feel like the monster. I still do."

He still didn't speak aloud but his thought came through loud and clear. _Me too._ He was looking down, ashamed. His shoulders were kind of slumped forward, dejected. "I know. But maybe we could help each other out." His eyes snapped back to mine. _How?_

"Well, you could come back with me. Make Alice happy. It'd be a relief to have you both around and then I wouldn't be the lone family freak anymore. Plus, I think you could give Emmett a run for his money in the fighting department. And he could really use being taken down a peg or two."

I could tell he was trying to bite back a smile. "And don't forget Rose. Wouldn't it be fun to mess with her a little bit? She could stand getting a heaping helping of humility. Just think of it, all the things we could pull off with our, uh, special gifts, if we worked together!" Then he did chuckle.

His gruff voice surprised me when he spoke aloud. "Yeah, that _might_ be fun." I grinned at him. "I think w could all use a little fun. Besides, you should see Esme when we get her riled up. She tries to pretend like we exasperate her with our shenanigans but secretly, I know she loves it."

He slowly shook his head. "I don't know Edward. It sounds good but well, if y'all or Alice decided you didn't want me around anymore…or if I screwed up and put your family at risk…" I waved my hand dismissively, cutting him off. "Trust me, it's more likely you won't want our crazy family around. As for putting us at risk, well you wouldn't be the first. Nearly each of us have done something that has caused us to have to pack up and move on quickly at some point or another. And in Emmett's case sometimes more than once!" Now time to bring in the big guns.

"Besides, you're without Alice now. At least if you're around her, you have a chance to make her happy. Be a part of her life." Ah-ha. There it was. He was starting to hope, to think that maybe there was a chance, maybe it could work. Now to close in the for the kill. He had not clue how good of a hunter I really was.

"Jasper, she needs you. Desperately. I know she seems so carefree. Light-hearted. But there's a fragility there. She's had some dark times." He blew out a large sigh and his eyes flashed at me in anger. "You think I don't know that? That's why I left. So she'd have a chance to be happy, have the life she's always wanted."

My temper rose. Stupid, stubborn Texas mule! "Dammit Jasper! _You_ are the life she's always wanted! And if you can't see that by now, then go, hightail yourself to Siberia. Have fun living on wolves and polar bears. And being an utterly alone and miserable creature. You have a real chance at happiness, a chance to really live a life and you're blowing it, man! Do you know what I'd give to even know what it felt like to have a woman love me a tenth as much as Alice loves you? Everything. I'd give everything."

His mouth was slightly agape and he was in shock. He snapped his jaw shut and had the grace to look sheepish. "I. am. An. Idiot. What am I doing? I can't live without Alice. Hell's bells, I don't _want_ to live without Alice." Yes! I had him. And no physical harm. Alice was going to be ecstatic. "Besides, I don't want to live on wolves. They stink."

Then I laughed, the sound echoing around us and he joined in. "Indeed they do, brother. Indeed they do. Shall we?" I moved to the side, gesturing with my arm for him to move past me. He reached out, gripping my shoulder with one hand while grabbing my hand with a solid shake. "Edward, I don't know how I'll be able to thank you for this. Really."

I felt a warm glow. He was a man of few spoken words but the sincerity of his thoughts, his hope that we could truly be brothers, was warming my cold heart. He was a good guy, if a little misguided and stubborn. But hey, so was I on occasion. Or so Rosalie had told me.

"Just make Alice happy. That'll be thanks enough." And then we both turned and took off in the direction of Gustavus and home. And then I started trying to recite the state capitals so I wouldn't be embarrassed by my new brother's thoughts of what his happy reunion with his love was going to entail. Argh, it sucked being the single one!


	16. Reunion

Okay, so I have to admit, I really love this chapter! Why? Because it's all about Alice and Jasper together. And I have really missed that, sigh! So just a little insight into where my mind was with this chapter, I was listening to a lot of Jason Mraz and the song Beautiful Mess was a big inspiration making this a really fast chapter to write. As always, thanks to all of my faithful reviewers as well as my new ones! Thanks for reading, your reviews inspire me to keep going so please keep reviewing. Also thanks for all the favorites/alerts adds. Don't be afraid to review! I love to hear from those who love these two and want to see them together as much as I do!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 16: Reunion

**Alice's POV**

He would be here any second. They were a couple of miles away. For a moment, a sense of relief flooded through me. Edward had convinced him to com home. To come back to me. But the doubt was still nagging me and I felt dread building inside of me. I was nervous. There were a million things I wanted to say but they all sounded pathetically desperate and needy when I said them in my mind.

It'd taken everything in me not to run out and meet them as soon as I'd had the vision of their return. I'd told everyone that they were on their way, to which Carlisle and Esme had looked relieved and murmured their delight while Emmett had stood grinning at me like a goofy bear and a smug look, saying he'd known they would.

He'd cracked his knuckles and joked about teaching Jasper a lesson for hurting his sister. I'd tried to grin back but couldn't. I knew he was joking but a part of me was scared he was serious and that he'd frighten Jasper off again. I couldn't be sure of Jazz's state of mind until he was in front of me and I could see into the face that I knew as well as my own and loved so dearly. Would it be the stubborn warrior face or the stone mask he used to hide his vulnerability? Or the soft face he had when he was about to kiss me, when he desired me? Or a new face that I didn't know?

Rosalie had been somber. She didn't say a word, merely looked at me intensely. I could see a hint of empathy in her eyes. She understood loss of a dream, loss of a love. She'd grabbed Emmett's arm and had softly told him that she needed his help in the garage. Cars were her escape and I was grateful for her excuse to give me privacy. I'd mouthed "Thank you" to her as Emmett had reluctantly turned to leave. She'd given a small nod of acknowledgement.

I'd known she wasn't as bad as she seemed. She put up walls to protect herself, but knowing her past and how much she resented the life she hadn't chosen, I couldn't blame her. She was an independent, strong-willed woman and I could relate to that. She was going to be a good sister, even if she didn't realize it yet.

I'd excused myself saying I needed some fresh air. As I'd run down the curving gravel drive, I'd determined I couldn't wait another second. I had to go and meet them. A flash of Jasper's face when he'd left me in the woods stopped me short when I was about halfway down the drive.

I felt frozen. Just as I had when he'd left. I couldn't go any further. I swayed and nearly fell to my knees under the crushing weight of the emotions I was reliving from that night. He'd rejected me, ripped my unbeating heart right out of my chest. Yes, he was coming back but that didn't mean he wanted me, that he still loved me. Maybe he just wanted to be part of the family, be around others who would help him with the vegetarian lifestyle.

I drew in a deep breath of the cold night air to steady myself. I was glad I was out of sight of the house. I knew Carlisle and Esme would be standing at the window, fretting and anxious as they awaited their sons' return. It'd been two days since he'd left. It seemed like an eternity. Or at least a century.

I caught their scents. Jasper's I would have known anywhere. It was as familiar to me as my own. Even if I didn't want to think about what I would do if he didn't want to be with me, he would be a part of me forever. I'd shared more with him than any other creature on this earth. He'd centered my very existence whether he knew it or not.

A bitter chuckle escaped my lips. Well of course he didn't realize that or he'd never have left me in the first place, alone and broken, all of his promises to protect me and be with me severed in that second he'd turned his back and fled for Siberia. A fact I still couldn't wrap my mind around. If he'd really loved me, how could it have been so easy for him to run out on me at the first sign of difficulty?

But I still couldn't help but hope that he did love me, even a little. As we'd stood there, me with my pathetic pleading, he with his stone mask, he'd mouthed "I love you" but hadn't spoken the words aloud. The memory was dim though, so much had been flooding through me at that moment. I hadn't even really felt like I was there, as if I was watching it happen to someone else. A part of me was convinced that I'd imagined that part as some sick way of trying to cope with the crushing loss of my love.

It didn't really matter now. They were on the paved road leading to the drive and in a flash, they both came to an abrupt stop about twenty feet away. They were looking at each other and hadn't seen me yet. Or at least I didn't think they had. I saw Edward put a hand on Jasper's shoulder, nodding. Jazz must have been saying something to him with his mind.

Frustrated at not knowing what was said, I scowled and looked down. I was nervously kicking at the gravel, making little designs. If I was honest with myself, a part of me was scared to look at Jasper's face, confirm my worst fears. I hadn't heard them walking toward me and only realized they'd moved when two enormous pairs of boots were in my line of vision, maybe about a foot away.

"Alice." My breath hitched. I didn't realize how badly I'd wanted it to be Jasper's voice until the disappointment swept through me as I recognized Edward's dulcet velvet tone. I felt my brow crease deeper. Wow, I was pathetic. I slowly raised my gaze careful not to look at Jasper and concentrated on my brother's angelic face with its smooth perfect angles. I'm sure some girls would find him incredibly gorgeous but I tended to prefer intricate scar patterns that danced in sunlight and moonlight.

Edward's gaze was steady, reassuring. He really was a good brother. _Thank you._ I didn't say it out loud. I didn't want to spook Jasper. I knew I was incredibly rigid, tense with the fear that any second he'd turn and take off again now that he'd seen me.

Edward didn't say a word. He merely moved forward and clasped me in a tight brotherly embrace. As his lips brushed softly against my cheek, he whispered, "Easy, love." Then he was gone leaving us alone.

I counted to ten in my mind trying to keep the gusher of all the things I was dying to say from spewing from my mouth. I'd closed my eyes. Jasper hadn't moved an inch or said a word. I was as attuned to him as I'd always been. My body hummed with the awareness of his nearness and my yearning for him was frightfully painful.

I was kicking gravel again. Oh why couldn't I play the ice queen like Rosalie, just this once? Be haughty and condescending as if I couldn't care less? Sheesh, because I _did_ care. More than anything. Frustrated with myself, I gave a final hard kick at the ground and gravel flew up pelting him in the shins.

Horrified, my gaze flew up to his and one of my hands came up to cove my gasping mouth. He looked as shocked as I felt. And…sad. He looked as I his best friend had died. "I'm so sorry," I gasped. "I didn't mean to…" My voice trailed off as a chuckle escaped his lips and then ended on a sigh. Okay, I wasn't sure what that meant.

He took a tentative step forward, unsure of himself. I could see the doubt written all over his face. I felt frozen again. I couldn't move, the proverbial deer in the headlights. Without a word, he reached out and lightly grabbed the hand that was still covering my mouth. Then he slowly brought it forward to his own lips and ever so softly brushed the back o my knuckles against them.

"Pixie," he whispered, his voice full of anguish, his eyes burning into mine. Regret, desire, and…love? No, I was imagining that last one, wishful thinking. My breath hitched in my chest. Every single thing I'd thought I wanted to say flew out of my head. His eyes were black as the night. He obviously hadn't fed while he was gone and I found myself falling into those dark depths.

I felt a calmness wash over me. He must have been nervous about my reaction so was trying to pre-empt any emotional outbursts. It was really annoying when he did that. My body and mind screamed to feel his nearness, his presence so I hated when he did that and I couldn't _feel_ him.

"Stop." He looked startled and dropped my hand like it was a hot poker. I felt a twinge of regret. I knew I sounded annoyed, harsh and of all the ways I'd imagined my first words to him—well—that hadn't exactly been it. I felt myself scowl in annoyance. And when I looked back up at his face, he looked stricken. Sheesh, this was not at all how I had dreamed our reunion would go.

"Do you want me to leave?" His gruff deep baritone penetrated my brain. Oh my God! I'd better pull it together or he'd be in Siberia by sundown tomorrow! "No!" I fairly shrieked at him. I reached out and gripped both of his solid forearms as tight as I could. As if he wouldn't be able to break free and take off again. But still I clung.

I saw relief in his eyes and pain too. "No." I said softly, my forlorn eyes never leaving his. "Please. Stay." He nodded slowly, his gaze boring into mine. He looked like a thirsty man who'd suddenly come upon an oasis. It was intense but I felt the same way, my eyes scanning every inch of his beautiful face, every angle, every plane, every scar. As if it all wasn't already burned in my memory forever.

I slowly felt like the hole that had been ripped in my chest when he took my heart with him, was slowly closing up. He still had my heart and he always would. That was a truth I had to accept. Just being near him, touching him, seeing him—well—it was as if a part of me had returned. The best part. Making me whole again.

"Oh, Jazz." I whispered. "What am I going to do with you?" Then that crooked grin I loved so much appeared on his face. "I don't know pixie. Chain me up in the tower room?" He arched a brow. "Have your way with me?" I couldn't help it. I laughed. He could always make me laugh even in the most serious situations.

"Hell's bells, you wouldn't even need the chains. You already torture me just with a touch." His fervent tone made my breath stop and my hands slid up his broad shoulders. His hands settled on my hips, pulling me to him. He rested his forehead against mine, his eyes never leaving mine, showing me how sorry he was. A delicious shiver ran down my spine. God, he thrilled me.

"There are no words." His whisper was tortured. And then I touched my lips to his. He was partially right. There were no words necessary.

Not when we were together. Not when he wasn't being a stubborn idiot. Not when I wasn't being a freaky desperate girl. There was just this.

My mouth opened under his and we clung to each other, drinking our fill, tasting each other in our own primal rhythm. Lost together, two lovers finally reunited after an eternity.

Sure I still had questions, wasn't certain if he loved me but this was enough. For now.

**Jasper's POV**

Alice. My pixie. My love. My heart. My soul. Well if I had one. I was consumed with her. I wasn't sure how I would convince her to forgive me. But this kiss was a good start. I hadn't been sure what to expect when we'd found her in the drive. The regret, the guilt was almost overwhelming.

I'd asked Edward to leave us alone. I didn't want an audience. Besides, in my world, it was just her and me. At least, that's how I pictured it. Being a part of a family would be nice. But it would be nothing without her. I'd been stupid. Idiotic. Moronic. To think even if I left her that I'd be able to stay away.

And I had caused her pain. Unnecessary horrible pain. Edward had told me a little but he'd been guarded. I knew he'd done it to keep me from taking off again. But he'd said enough. And nothing I didn't already suspect with that final scene scorched in my memory.

As her tongue darted out and tangled with mine, none of that seemed to matter. The world fell away and all was right. My love was in my arms. Where she belonged. I knew the hard parts were yet to come. There would be questions. My pixie never let anything drop. And as I knew she always got her way. Always.

But I didn't mind. I'd do anything for her. Besides, it would take an eternity to make up for what I'd done to her. And as her hands slid up and tangled in my hair anchoring me to her, I knew that was fine with me. In fact, an eternity wouldn't be long enough for me to be with this woman.

The important thing is that now we were reunited. The rest of it—well—I could handle it. Anything would be better than spending one more second of hell away from my love, my life. And then I swept her into my arms and took off for the tower room for a truly proper reunion. The reunion I had dreamed of all the way home.


	17. Answers

I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. I don't want to give too much away so I'll just let you read for yourself. As always, please review and let me know what you think. I've been remiss in giving a shout-out to wolfgirl who roots for these two as hard as I do! Also a big welcome to edwardcullenfan who is new to fanfic! Welcome to the world and enjoy the ride! Until next time, dear readers…

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 17: Answers

**Jasper's POV**

I couldn't move. Not that I wanted to. But literally, I couldn't. I was being held down by a pixie. She hadn't used chains. Much. I smiled at the thought of how—um—vigorous we'd been in our reunion, not wasting a single second of being back together.

At some point, I'd moved the featherbed and all of the fancy fixings that Esme had put with it from my room to the tower room. Just to switch things up a bit. Plus, Alice liked doing human things with human conveniences. She called it making memories.

Luckily, the rest of the family had made themselves scarce over the past two days. Of course, that didn't mean Emmett hadn't had his fun trying to embarrass us with pointed remarks about our _prolonged_ absence and sophomoric double entendres, his raucous guffaws shaking the house.

We'd barely noticed, completely immersed in being together, learning about each other, what drove the other one crazy. It was during one of those sessions Alice had discovered a particularly sensitive spot just below my earlobe. That discovery had resulted in the destruction of Esme's ornate four-poster bed frame. It was the featherbed mattress that we were now lying on in the middle of the tower room surrounded by dozens and dozens of fluffy pillows. It seemed Esme was convinced that if humans ever did come to visit they'd _really_ want a lot of pillows. So Alice had insisted on me bringing up every last blasted one of the things "for the full effect" as she'd told me.

I was absently stroking Alice's soft dark hair, looking up out of the ceiling window at the bright blue sky with puffy clouds. One of those rare sunny days in Gustavus. Every once in a while a sunbeam would come through at the right angle making Alice's skin sparkle like the most gorgeous gemstones.

We hadn't spoken in a while. I could tell she was thinking. She was drawing patterns on my arm as was her habit when she was trying to keep from blurting out the first thing on her mind. If I could have seen her face, I'm sure her brow would've been creased in concentration as well. I felt a slight smile touch my lips at the thought. Just as quickly, though, the smile became a slight frown.

I knew what she was thinking about. It was the polar bear in the room that couldn't be ignored now that we had ceased and desisted our activities for a while. Of course, I was such a bonehead when it came to saying or doing the right thing in these situations. Obviously. Which was why we were in this position in the first place. Not an altogether unpleasant position to be in as pleasure ran down my spine at the sensation of Alice shifting her body on top of mine.

She brought her arms up to my chest, crossing her hands and resting her chin on them, looking at me. I tilted my head to the left so I could look directly back at her. Her face glowed as a slow smile spread across her lips. The smile that would've made my heart stop if it wasn't already not beating.

But there was a shadow in her topaz eyes. My chest tightened painfully at the look. I was the one who put that shadow there. How could I ever make it up to her? I wasn't smooth with words like Edward or fun-loving like Emmett and definitely not kind like Carlisle.

I was just a Texas soldier who was too rigid, got tongue-tied, had committed barbaric acts (the most barbaric act had been leaving her in the woods, alone)…and felt way too much. I still didn't understand why she chose to love me.

"Jazz." Her soft lilting voice cut through my self-recriminations, bringing my focus back on her. I slid my hand up her back and brought it around, brushing her hair back from her smooth forehead. I leaned forward and placed a lingering kiss there. I worked my way down, feathering kisses across her eyebrows and then each eyelid.

She sighed, whether in pleasure or exasperation, I couldn't tell. I knew part of me was trying to distract her, not wanting this cocoon that we'd woven around ourselves keeping the world out, to be broken. But I also knew part of it was that I was just addicted to touching her, wanting her. An addiction I didn't want to break.

I was afraid of this conversation. Afraid that what I would say would break her addiction to me. I had to have gone a little crazy to think that I could leave her, live without her. Not now. Definitely not ever. I'd only lived half an existence until that rainy day in Philadelphia when my pixie had skipped into my life. I knew that now. I had to do whatever it took to make her believe in me again. Believe in us.

Being responsible for the happiness of another being was a completely new feeling. A scary feeling. No doubt I had already screwed it up royally. But hell's bells, I was a soldier. Feelings weren't our specialty. Even if they were my—um—specialty. I was better at masking feelings, sending out calm vibes, clouding minds rather than meeting them head-on.

I sighed and sat up, rearranging the masses of pillows. In my frustration and nervousness, I punched one of larger pillows a little harder than intended, causing a snowstorm of white feathers to swirl up into the air and drift slowly around us. Alice, already surprised by my abrupt movements, looked at me with her pink lips slightly parted in horror. Then her eyes twinkled and we simultaneously burst into roaring laughter, shaking the windows surrounding us.

She threw herself in my arms, knocking me back further into the pillows, our bodies shaking with our laughter, our faces inches apart. She reached her hand up and brushed the feathers out of my hair. "First Esme's bed and now you murder her pillow. I don't know how you're going to make up for this one, soldier." Her tone was light, teasing, but the words resonated with me and my laughter died in my chest.

I sat up and set her to my right side. "Alice." Wow, I sounded so somber even to my own ears. The twinkle in her eyes went out and her laughter died as well. She suddenly looked as somber as I had sounded. Her forlorn eyes seemed to be focused on my chest. Damn, she couldn't look me in the eyes.

"I know," she whispered. "We need to talk." If I hadn't been a vampire, there's no way I would have heard her. I let out a sigh, lifted my hand and tucked it under her chin, raising her gaze to mine. She peeked at me shyly from under her impossibly long lashes. God, she was so beautiful and she didn't even realize it. I didn't know what I'd done to deserve a creature like her.

I gave a slight shake of my head. Nothing. So far, I'd mainly managed to break her trust in me, disappoint her in the worst possible way. Hell, broken her heart. I guess there wasn't much left I _could_ do to scare her off. Yep, she was stuck with me now. For better or worse.

She was looking down again, twisting and untwisting her entwined fingers. She was nervous. Or scared. Maybe both. I reached out one of my hands and placed it on top of both of hers, giving what I hoped was a reassuring squeeze. She stopped twisting her fingers but still didn't look up. Okay, this was absolute torture.

I tried to open my mouth, to be the first one to speak up. To give her the answers she so obviously desperately needed, deserved. If I spoke up first it would keep her from having to relive the pain by asking the questions.

But my lips wouldn't open. It was as if they were glued together. When she finally did ask her questions, I could only pray that my lips would pry apart, I would find my voice, and I'd be able to give her the answers she needed to stay with me. Or it was going to be a cold, miserable, lonely existence in Siberia.

**Alice's POV**

I couldn't look at him. I'd tried. I was on my knees beside him, surrounded by brightly colored fluffy pillows. The sun was shining through the windows throwing his scar patterns into brightly shining dancing patterns. Just like I liked them. And I wanted nothing more than to look at him. Drink my fill. It didn't seem real that he was here. With me. Just as I had dreamed.

Oh, and to think of all the things we had done since reuniting. Land's sake as they would say in Texas! I felt naughty and delicious all at the same time. I finally felt like a real woman. Or how I'd imagined a well-loved, cherished human might feel with the blush of first love. But was I loved and cherished? Conversation had been the last thing on either of our minds as we'd explored each other.

It was during one of those explorations that he'd found the most delightfully sensitive spot at the juncture where my neck met my shoulder. When he'd found it, I couldn't help but nip where my lips were which happened to be right below his earlobe. And that had been the end of Esme's poor lovely human four-poster bed frame. Now we were both covered in feathers as well thanks to an ill-advised fluffing of one of the pillows. A beautiful mess.

But I needed some answers. I didn't know where to start. Wasn't sure what question might set him off, causing him to take off, leave me again. He was stroking the back of my hand with his thumb. The same reassuring gesture he'd used in the diner in Philadelphia. My heart ached at the memory. I'd been trying to say difficult things to him then too. Tell him about my freakishness. My visions. How long ago it seemed. And how very wrong those visions seemed now.

Sure, parts of them had come true. But he'd left. That wasn't part of the original plan. If we stayed together though, I guess I should come to expect the unexpected. My soldier was unpredictable. Which was a weird trait for a soldier. But not a soldier trained under that crazy bitch Maria. I was pretty sure I could thank her for the situation we were in now.

He'd never known true love. Deep abiding love. Like the love I had for him. _And_ he'd never had anyone who believed in him, wanted what was best for _him_. Like the way I believed in him. Wanted what was best for him. That's why I knew absolutely he belonged here. With me. With the Cullens. But I needed to know if he felt the same way about me. If this was the life he wanted. If _I_ was what he wanted.

And that was a hard thing to ask. Especially when it was something you wanted more than anything you'd ever wanted in your entire existence. Even human blood when you were _really, really_ thirsty. Even more than the family that you loved desperately that was waiting downstairs to find out what the verdict was. Even more than a really beautiful couture Chanel gown.

I drew a deep breath and was a little embarrassed at how shaky it sounded as I blew it out my lips slowly. His thumb stopped stroking and his grip tightened. I peeked up under my lashes. His brow was creased and his eyes looked worried. A muscle ticked in his jaw as if he was about to say something but his mouth never opened. Okay, it was now or never. A little courage had blossomed inside me when I saw that he didn't look mad or even bored. Just concerned. And I thought it was concern about me. Maybe.

"So, I need to say some things. And ask you some things. And I need you to promise that you're not going anywhere until I finish and you give me some answers. Okay?" I raised my eyes to his, not letting my gaze drop, needing his acknowledgment. His eyes never left mine as he bowed his head slightly and though he didn't utter a word, I knew it was his solemn vow.

"First, I need you to know that I love you. Still. Always. There is nothing and I mean _nothing_ you could ever do to make me stop. I won't stop until my existence ends. And probably not even then." Crap. I hadn't meant to say _all _of that. But once I'd opened my mouth it'd just come pouring out. I guess my brain thought that if I was going to scare him off, nothing would do it faster than shackling him to me for eternity.

His eyes were wide with shock. Black saucers in his pale face. But to his credit, he didn't get up and run. And that was encouraging. Of course, I didn't know if he felt the same but at least I'd gotten it off my chest. "_But_, and this is a big but, you hurt me. I mean wounded me in a way that I wasn't sure I'd live through. I'm not even sure I'm the same person I was before you left."

I laughed a bitter chuckle. "And you were only gone for two days, you stubborn jackass!" His eyes now not only showed concern but regret. It was written all over his face. Was there in the way his hand had tightened in a painful grasp of my hands. "And I AM PISSED!" My voice was getting louder. Shriekier. Dang, I hated that. I didn't want to sound like a shrew. I wanted to sound dangerous. Like he might lose a part of his anatomy if he did that to me again. A precious part.

I lowered my voice. "I mean, I'm pissed!" There that was better. I was kind of scaring myself with that tone. "All you had to do was talk to me. If you were having doubts, if you thought you couldn't handle it, well, all you had to do was realize you weren't in this alone. I was with you every step."

His hand released mine and he brought both hands up to his face and rubbed his eyes, like he was tired. Or wiping away tears. Which was impossible since vampires couldn't cry. I waited until he lowered them, giving him a second to absorb what I'd said.

"I know." His sad whisper cut through shocking me to the core. "Then why didn't you?" I whispered back, the tone sounding sad even to my own ears. He didn't answer right away. I had to literally bite my tongue to keep from filling the silence. I was not the most patient girl.

He looked up and _he_ looked so sad. "This is so much harder to say than I thought." I reached out and cupped his cheek. "Just say it." I steeled myself. This is it. He doesn't love me. Oh, maybe he likes me but he doesn't love me. And he doesn't know how to say it. Then his hand came up and covered mine and trapped my palm to his cheek as he turned his head into it. His eyes closed for the briefest moment as if savoring the touch and my breath left me.

His eyes slowly opened and the fierceness in them drew a gasp from my lips. "As long as I exist, I will never, _never_ forgive myself for what I did to you. You have every right to be angry with me. Hell's bells, pixie. You have every right to hate me. And the fact that you still love me—well—that's my life preserver." The hope was bubbling in me. Okay, maybe he did love me.

"I'll admit it. All of this, the Cullens, you, it's all so unlike anything I've known during my life as a vampire. It scared me. Scared the hell out of me. I hope you can understand, this has been a lot to take in a very short time. And I didn't handle it very well. Okay, well, I didn't handle it at all. And I'm sorry." He mirthlessly laughed then. "God, those words. They're not enough. What I mean to say is…I want you. This. This life with the Cullens. A family. All of it. But most of all, I want you. Forever."

I wanted to throw myself in his arms, have him never let me go. But I needed more. Greedy I know. But he deserved to squirm a little. Plus, he still hadn't said he loved me. I knew he _wanted_ me. He'd done nothing but shown me that for two days. Without warning, he went up on one knee and grabbed my hand.

"Alice. My pixie. You have shown me the possibility of a life I never knew could exist for a creature like me. You've given me reason to hope that the best is yet to come. Even if Edward hadn't come to get me, I realize that I would've been on my way back to you before I even set foot out of Alaska. And I'm on my knees now begging you to forgive me." He paused and raised my hand to his, kissing the soft pads of my fingertips and then pressing them against his lips as if he was gathering his thoughts. Then he lowered them and clasped the hand he'd just kissed in both of his.

"Alice, honey. I love you. Still. Always. I never didn't love you. I left because my twisted warped mind thought that it was what was best for you." He half-smiled as he continued. "And Edward was right. I was a stupid, stubborn Texas mule." I couldn't help myself. I muttered, "Yeah, he was right." He chuckled then.

"See, honey, that's what I need. I need you to put me in my place. Remind me when I'm being stupid. Stubborn. Idiotic. Selfish. But most of all, I need you to laugh with me, laugh at me, talk to me, hunt with me, walk with me, run with me. And love me. Always. Pixie, what I'm trying to say…badly…is, well…" The suspense was killing me but the hole in my chest was completely healed. Soothed by his words of love. And then I saw it. The wedding vision. Oh my stars! This was it!

Before he could get another word out, I threw myself into his arms, knocking him backward onto the bed. I rained kisses everywhere my lips landed on his face. "Alice!" He sounded very twangy. Like he did when he got annoyed. I pulled back and grinned at him. And then shouted at the top of my lungs. "THE ANSWER IS YES!!!" And then he let out a rebel soldier's whoop and his lips were on mine, insistent, hot, demanding. I had all the answers I needed. And he'd gotten the one he'd wanted most. So the wedding planning was put on hold for the next forty eight hours or so.


	18. Permission

Sorry it's taken so long to update. I was in New York City this week and didn't have much time to type. I did get this chapter written though and am well on my way on the next chapter as well. Up until now, I hadn't really known where this story was going, where it would end. Of course, as one of my faithful reviewers pointed out to me, Alice and Jasper never end, they go on forever! (Thanks Cris!) But now, they have at least shown me where this is going and where it will end. Not for a few more chapters yet, so please enjoy the ride the rest of the way! As always, thanks to all of my reviewers, please keep it up! Your encouragement and ideas are so motivating. And finally, a special thanks to Becky for thinking that I don't suck, thanks Becks!

Disclaimer: I am writing this story because I am a fan of Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight Saga. I do not own any of the characters, plot lines or any Twilight-related materials.

Visions of Love

Chapter 18: Permission

**Jasper's POV**

Okay, this was stupid. Why was I so nervous? I knew what I wanted but I was as jumpy as a toad's ass on a hot rock. Or something like that. I vaguely remembered one of my human brothers saying that at one time or another. Like most of my human memories, it was a little hazy. I still hadn't convinced Alice that she wasn't missing much.

That was why I was in this position. She wanted the whole blasted human wedding experience. I blew out a frustrated sigh and looked at myself in the mirror. I was more dressed up than I'd ever been in either my human or vampire existences. I had on a crisp white button down oxford and stiff black denim jeans, brand new, courtesy of my pixie.

I also had new boots, the nicest pair I'd ever owned. They were alligator and a gift from Edward. He said it was for coming back and getting Alice off his case. But I could see through his good-natured grumbling. He adored Alice as only a big brother could. (He insisted that since he'd been a vamp longer than her, he was her "older" brother even though had they been human she would have been a year or two older than him.)

They had the most unique relationship. It was as if each of them had half the puzzle and they completed each other's thoughts. If I wasn't so secure in Alice's feelings for me which inundated me anytime we were within twenty feet of each other, I would have been green with jealousy. A half-smile touched my lips as I basked in the emotions for a moment. I remembered my initial jealousy, okay, hatred of Edward when Alice first told me about him.

It seemed silly now. I knew Alice in ways that Edward would never know. Of course, physically, but that went without saying. It was hard for me to my wrap my mind around our relationship since on the surface we seemed so opposite of one another. But I preferred to think of it in terms of we complemented each other. We also had a lot of things in common.

First, we were both stubborn. Which should make our existence together—um—interesting to say the least. And , well, most likely to be combustible most of the time. And based on the combusting we'd done during our reunion, I was looking forward to that. And of course, it was thanks to that reunion that I was now standing here tugging at the silver coyote clasp of my bolo tie that Alice had insisted on purchasing to complete my "cowboy" look complete. I'd tried to explain to her that no self-respecting cowboy would be caught undead in this get-up. But she'd pouted and looked so disappointed that I'd caved. And so now here I stood looking in the mirror one more time before presenting myself to the task at hand. The reason for my nerves.

Alice had accepted my proposal. I chuckled as the memory flickered in my mind. Of course, I hadn't actually had the opportunity to pop the question aloud. Patience was not at the top of my pixie's virtues list. Yet another thing we had in common. I'd been so relieved that she'd forgiven me. And that she actually _wanted_ to marry me which still left me a little floored each time I thought about it.

I hope she still felt that way after the next one hundred years or so. I knew I would. I had no doubts about that. Hell's bells, I knew I'd still feel that _five hundred_ years from now. Well at least her impatience had given me the opportunity to do this right. Especially since this was the only time I planned on doing this.

I was an old-fashioned Texas boy. And old-fashioned Texas boys asked permission from his sweetheart's father for her hand in marriage. So I needed to talk to Carlisle. I knew he was in his study. I'd heard him go in there when he got home from the hospital. That was his way to relax, come down from his emotions after being at the hospital for hours. He was very good at self-control. Probably no one else even suspected the tension he felt when coming home. But I did. Naturally, I'd never give him away.

I slowly left my room. I'd moved back to Esme's "human" room after Alice agreed to marry me. She wasn't exactly happy with my old-fashioned notion of waiting until after the wedding, especially since we already hadn't…waited. Several times. But I was determined. Again, I wanted to do this right. And although she usually had me wrapped around her pixie pinkie, I was bound and determined to win this battle.

Which made my good-natured, fun-loving pixie uncharacteristically cranky. Which only served to fuel my amusement. Much to her chagrin. Which then only served to further fuel my amusement. It was a vicious circle. At least for her. I…I was happier than I ever dreamed of being. At least I would be if this conversation with Carlisle went like I hoped it would.

He and I needed to discuss more than Alice and mine's possible wedding. I needed to know how he saw us fitting in here. Well, Alice already fit in. How he saw me fitting in. How we'd present this most unusual situation to the outside world. I didn't know how to exist in the human world. Honestly, I wasn't sure if I _could _do it. But I had to try, to do my damndest. For Alice. For us.

I'd made my way downstairs and was standing outside Carlisle's closed study door. I raised my hand to knock and froze. Maybe this was all wrong. He wasn't really her "father". We were grown vamps. We didn't need his permission. But just as quickly as those rebellious thoughts popped in my head, I rejected them. No, this was the right thing to do. I couldn't let my fear of disappointing Alice or the Cullens rule my emotions again. That had disastrous consequences. Like me doing crazy, stupid things like thinking I could live in Siberia. I shook my head slightly, a sheepish grin spreading across my lips.

I heard Carlisle's quiet voice. "Are you going to come in Jasper or skulk outside my door all evening?" I hung my head, slightly embarrassed. Well, I guess I was going to have to get used to it sooner or later, that lack of privacy that came with being a part of a family. Especially a vampire family.

I drew a deep breath and pushed the door open. Well, here went noting. Okay, actually here went everything. I straightened my shoulders and put on my best soldier's face. Not that I thought I was going into battle. But just in case. You never knew. If there was anything I'd learned in the past couple of months, life with Alice was completely and utterly unpredictable.

Despite her claims to the contrary.

**Carlisle's POV**

Something was holding him back. I'd heard his heavy footsteps coming from the third floor, down the stairs and then stopping just outside my study door. He'd probably been stranding there for five minutes or more. I couldn't help but let out a sigh. Poor Jasper. This was all so new for him—the lifestyle, being with a family, being in love. It was a lot for a man to take in.

Of course his ill-advised, spur-of-the-moment decision to take off for Siberia had been a product of that fear. He really had no reason to trust that there was a better existence than he'd lived to this point. To be turned by a creature like the Maria he'd told us about…I shuddered at the thought of all he'd suffered under her cruel hands.

I put a bookmark in the text I'd been reading and leaned back in my large black leather office chair, my fingers steepled under my chin as I looked out the window to see the sun slowly, sinking behind the trees, signaling another dying of the day. Fire across the sky.

When I saw such wonders, it brought back so many memories of the lessons taught to me by my minister father. And it renewed my determination, my resolve, that yes, even creatures such as us could be better, deserved better.

But how to convince a scarred creature (not just physically, that was of no consequence, but emotionally) like Jasper of that? I still hadn't convinced my oldest son of it. And Edward hadn't even done a tenth of what Jasper had. Nor did he have to deal with the emotions Jasper was constantly dealing with. But Edward was a thinker, internalizing and analyzing every little thing. Which wasn't a bad thing.

However I had failed in convincing him that the responsibility he took on, the conscience he had, well, that was the proof of having a soul. He was so good and yet he still didn't see that about himself. I knew he thought of himself as a monster which brought me such regret, such sadness. For I truly thought of him as my son. And no father would want his child to thing of himself that way.

I knew Jasper was dealing with these same issues. And that hurt as well. I may not have been his creator but it had not taken long to care for him and Alice as my own created children. It may not have been apparent to someone who was looking from the outside and definitely not apparent to Jasper himself but he was completely easy to care about.

Esme saw it too. She and I had discussed his quiet strength, how protective he was of Alice, with his ability—the sensitivity he had for others, trying to make everyone comfortable. He had a wicked sense of humor when he let it show. He didn't talk much but it was a nice contrast to his more loquacious siblings.

And while on the surface he and Alice may not have seemed to be compatible, there was so much about each one that balanced the other. It was obvious that they were two halves of a whole. And with their gifts, will, I would be eternally grateful that they showed up on our lawn unannounced all those weeks ago because their arrival had brought a light to Edward's eyes I'd never seen. I knew he no longer felt as isolated, not quite as alone. And that warmed my soul.

I knew it wasn't the same as finding a love of his own but in Alice he'd found a warm and loving sister relationship that had just never materialized with Rosalie, much to my regret. With Jasper, there was a brother that he could connect with on a deeper level than games and hijinks. Not that he didn't care about Rose and Emmett. It was just…different. Esme and I felt truly blessed. And Alice had been right, they completed our family.

He still hadn't knocked. I should probably make the first move, let him know he wasn't interrupting. There was no need to raise my voice as I called out, "Are you going to come in Jasper or skulk outside my door all evening?" A pause and I felt my brow crease in worry, thinking maybe I had spooked him off. Then the door opened and he stepped in looking every inch the soldier.

I suppressed a smile as I took in his new outfit. I knew Rose and Alice had been doing a _lot_ of shopping as the credit card bills had started to pour in. I didn't mind. We had plenty of money, one of the benefits of existing for centuries. And in the short time since Alice had arrived she'd made some scarily accurate investment predictions adding to the family fortunes.

But poor Jasper had apparently become the guinea pig for Alice to exert all of her fashion will upon. And of course, I could only guess that being the southern gentleman he was, Jasper would wear whatever she bought him without complaint. Yet another mark in the good column in my book but again probably something he didn't see about himself. What was I going to do with these children?

I gestured to the matching leather guest chair in front of my desk and silently, he moved forward, perching ramrod straight on the edge of the chair. He was posed as if sitting for a portrait. I could feel the tension roll off of him. What could have him worked up in such a state? Surely he wasn't considering leaving again? No, I wouldn't believe that. He'd seemed much more content the past few weeks since his return. Plus he wouldn't leave Alice. That I was sure of. And there was no way I would let him take her from us. I couldn't bear to think of what it would do to Esme or their siblings if they left. I didn't think that was it though.

His amber eyes searched my face nervously. They weren't completely the liquid topaz color the rest of us sported but you could no longer see any hint of red. It was symbolic of how he was regaining his humanity. Now just to convince him of that.

"Is there something you needed, son?" I wanted to put him at ease. Nervously, he cleared his throat. I leaned forward and rested my elbows on my desk. "Jasper, is something wrong?" I was concerned now. His eyes widened in surprise and he barked out, "No!" I felt relief flood through me.

He reached up and ran a hand through his blonde curls. His coloring was very similar to Rosalie's. It would not be difficult to pass them off as blood-related siblings. I'd been thinking about this a lot lately. How to present our family to the outside world. As the head of the house, it was my job to make sure we were protected from exposure.

The important thing was to keep things simple. One thing I had learned over the years was that if you provided the simplest explanation, humans tended to take it at face value, either not having the time or the inclination to scratch much beneath the surface. They usually had enough to deal with within their own families. They wouldn't question yours.

Of course, the most problematic was how a married couple that looked as young as we did could handle a houseful of teenagers. And thanks to Esme's mothering skills, quite well. Naturally it helped when the "kids" weren't really kids after all. I noticed that Jasper was looking around my "study" which really could have served as the public library for a town the size of Gustavus.

He looked uncomfortable and his lips were kind of moving as if he was rehearsing something, but there was no sound. Or maybe he was counting the books that lined the walls from floor to ceiling. If so we'd be here a while. I felt a small smile touch my lips. I was a patient man. I could wait until he was ready.

I saw him draw in a deep breath. He must have quite a speech prepared. I had to admit my curiosity was at a fever pitch. He looked at me then, his face a determined mask. "Carlisle, I know you probably already know what I'm about to as you, but I was raised a certain way and I still find it difficult at times to let go of some of the old traditions." He gave a lop-sided smile then and raised one shoulder in a nonchalant shrug.

I gave a small reassuring smile back at him along with a small nod to let him know I understood. That was part of what my children didn't realize yet but holding on to some of our beliefs, our memories from our human lives, they helped us in the existence we were living now. It's what made us different, that kept us from existing on vampiric instinct and senses alone. I gave a small imperceptible sigh. Perhaps they would understand some day.

He looked back down at this hands that were resting on his knees, pale contrasted against the black denim. I figured he was deciding what he wanted to say. "Well, I know Alice and I haven't been here that long but we think of you as family. And Alice, she-she really looks up to you as a father—the father she doesn't remember." His brows knitted together as if in concentration. "Not to say that I don't too. But…I mean…what I'm trying to say is I love her. More than anything. And I want to do right by her. She makes me a better man. Better than I thought possible."

He was talking very rapidly so I focused completely on the words he was saying. I still wasn't quite sure where he was going but I was starting to get an inkling. And it was just about the most endearing thing if he was doing what I thought—seeking my permission for Alice's hand. "And I want to make her happy. Well, you see Carlisle, being here, being part of the family, that's what does it. So I figured, if we're going to be living here under your roof and all. Well…dang…I don't know why I'm having such a hard time spitting this out."

I grinned thinking of how nerve-wracked I'd been the first time I'd proposed to Esme. And I hadn't had to contend with a potential father-in-law. Poor guy. "Just say it. You can always be open with me. No judgments, I promise." He looked at me and I saw relief in his eyes. And trust. Good, he believed me. That was a start.

"Well sir, I've asked Alice to be my wife and by some small miracle she's agreed." This was not a huge surprise. We'd all tried to make ourselves scarce during their reunion but it wasn't hard to know, it'd been a happy one. "That's wonderful news, Jasper!" He grinned back at me the enthusiasm dancing in his eyes. "Thank you, sir. _I_ think so. But the reason I'm here…is…I know it's a little late to ask you for her hand, but if you would consent to give it, to give us your blessing—well, it would make me feel a whole lot better about this."

He made a grand sweeping gesture with his arm and I took it to mean about everything—being part of the family, living here with us, all of it. I was touched. Sure I had no real say about any of it, but that he'd wanted to do this for Alice's sake, and whether he realized it or not even his won, it was all I needed to know about what kind of man he was.

"It's not even a question, son. Of course. Nothing will make me happier." I knew my smile was wide, genuine. He beamed back with his own big smile. My heart warmed at the sight. I'd never seen Jasper Whitlock look genuinely happy. Then his smile faded and the crease returned between his brows.

"What is it son?" He looked at me, his eyes wary, even a little confused. "Uh, well, I was just wondering, how this is all going to work? I mean, how can Alice and I truly be man and wife if the outside world thinks we're siblings?" Gently, I smiled at him.

"Don't worry son. We've been through this before with Rose and Emmett. I think it will work just as well this time. You and Rose could pass for blood siblings so you'll be Rosalie and Jasper Hale. It's the name Rose has been going by for a while now. You can be Esme's nice and nephew, taken in after your parents were killed. And Lice, Edward and Emmett can be Cullens—my blood relatives." He was nodding. I could tell that he was thinking that would work. I could see the hope in his eyes. I wanted to nurture that for him. It would go a long way in helping him accept this new life.

"It might seem somewhat unusual to outsiders but not completely considering Esme and I raising a houseful of randy teenagers." He burst out laughing then and I joined him, his deep baritone resonating around us. He should laugh more often. You could see it lift the weight of the world off his shoulders. "Well, should we go tell Alice the good news?" He grinned. "Oh, yes sir! It's been killing her not being able to tell everyone and start bossing them around. She's planning quite the shindig. And as you're father of the bride, I think it's only fair to warn you, you might want to take out a second mortgage on this house. Or get a few more stock tips from her."

I laughed and came around the desk. He'd stood and was turning toward the door. I put an arm around his shoulders as we headed out to find the lucky bride-to-be. "I'll tell you an old Cullen family secret when it comes to weddings, son. It's just best to just stand back and let it happen. And don't forget to say "yes dear". A lot." He nodded solemnly and then we both chuckled, sharing in the feeling of belonging, forging the bond that brings men together when bachelorhood ends and they realize their life is no longer their own.

And from the warm butterscotch tone of his eyes and the shine of his white even teeth, I thought that no man had ever looked happier to strap on the shackles of matrimony than Jasper Whitlock. And then the image of my radiant bride on our wedding day so long ago flashed in my mind. Well except maybe for his old man.


	19. Paris

Special thanks to all who have added me as your favorite stories/author. It is thrilling to see that each time it happens, never gets old! I can't believe I've written over 40,000 words so far! Another special thanks to Ilithya. Your last review blew me away and one of my favorite things in this process has been how invested you are in this story and how you cheerlead me through it! Thanks! Also a BIG welcome to dazzeled10 who is new to fan fic and I have been remiss in mentioning! Enjoy, it's an amazing world to be a part of! This has been such an incredible experience so to those of you who have let me know how worried you are about the story ending, don't worry, I have a few other ideas for other stories as well so I hope you'll like the new stuff I'll start on when this particular chapter is closed on Alice and Jazz. (Trust me, no way I could live without them in my lives now that they've become such a big part of it!) Ah, Paris in the springtime…one final note—I've never visited Paris personally so please forgive me for any liberties taken with geography or locations.

Disclaimer: I am writing this story because I am a fan of Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight Saga. I do not own any of the characters, plot lines or any Twilight-related materials.

Visions of Love

Chapter 19: Paris

**Alice's POV**

Nothing was grander than Paris in April. At least that's what I decided as I glided down the Champs Elysees, my arm threaded through my new mother's arm. It was twilight and the gas lamps were casting ribbons of yellow over the dark waters of the Seine.

I took in a deep breath and was assailed by the scent of tulips, fresh baked bread and of course, tourists. Masses of them. But I didn't care. I, Alice Cullen, was on my way to a private appointment at Yves St. Laurent to try on my couture wedding gown. Who could have thought such a thing possible? I certainly hadn't.

It hadn't been hard to get used to my new name, I loved being a Cullen…but Alice Hale had an even nicer ring…rings…I looked down at the emerald and diamond ring sparkling on my finger. I sighed in rapture at the memory of Jasper sliding it onto my left hand as we'd been alone, relishing our time away from everyone. We'd been on "our" glacier. The glacier where we'd both made our first declarations to each other. The stars had been twinkling down on us and the calm sea had looked like a sheet of glass with the full moon shining down on it.

He'd been so shy, seeming almost embarrassed. I'd been puzzled at first, almost disappointed, thinking that he was embarrassed of me, freak that I am, since I'd ruined his proposal the week before. He hadn't _seemed_ unhappy though. Quite the opposite in fact, if his exertions right after I said yes were any indication.

I was standing and he was kneeling, his head bowed as he looked at my left hand clasped in his right one. He stroked his thumb over the bare ring finger. Then he slowly raised his eyes and the molten amber nearly set me on fire. I seriously thought I was about to go up in flames. Thank goodness we were standing on a glacier!

I was so lost in his gaze that I didn't register the heavy weight sliding over my knuckle until I felt his slight squeeze. I somehow tore my gaze away and gasped. Loudly. A large square cut emerald surrounded by diamonds set in an antique gold setting was the heavy weight.

"Oh, Jasper. Wow. How…" My voice left me as he closed his eyes and placed a kiss on the ring on my finger. Then opening his eyes, they found mine as he slowly turned my hand over, placing a fierce lingering kiss in my palm that matched the fire in his eyes. "It's a family heirloom." His voice was rough as if choked on emotion. I knew he must have seen surprise in my eyes because he quickly added with a lop-sided grin, "A Cullen family heirloom." My lips formed an "o". "Carlisle gave it to me. I hope you don't mind having a hand-me-down."

I could see he was unsure. "Jazz, are you kidding? It's perfect. You're perfect." Then I couldn't stop the delighted laugh that bubbled from my lips. I tugged and immediately he sprung to his feet like a big cat and in the same fluid movement swept me up in his arms, twirling, his lips on mine, sealing our future.

I came back to the lights of Paris as I felt Esme's steps slow. I realized we'd turned on Place Saint-Sulpice and were now standing in front of the YSL store. The building was as beautiful as the dresses displayed in the elegant store windows. I felt my skin tingle, not only because of the memory of Jazz, but also in anticipation of what we were about to do.

Esme had insisted that I had to have the perfect dress, only the best would do for her new daughter. She'd had Carlisle call in a favor with an old European friend. Any guilt I'd been feeling had completely erased when she'd whisked me on the plane looking as thrilled as I felt. And fourteen hours later here we were, in Paris, at a top designer house, to get my wedding dress. I felt so…human! And as we stepped through the magical doors and were taken to the private show room on the top floor, I felt like I'd died and gone to fashion heaven.

Esme had banned males from the trip. I was a little reluctant at first, torn between the desire to shop in Paris for the first time but loathe to be away from Jasper for even a day. Half a day. But Esme had been adamant that she and I do it alone—have a little mother-daughter bonding time and the siren's call of feeling like someone's daughter coupled with the thrill of getting my wedding dress tipped the scales in favor of Paris.

I'd been a little worried that Rose would be jealous or would feel left out but oddly she'd been relieved. She felt much more comfortable under the hood of her 1959 cherry red Maserati Spyder convertible than in haute couture or being away from Emmett for any period of time. She had been a good sport though the past few weeks being my Barbie doll. She was so gorgeous in anything she put on that I hadn't been able to control myself. It'd been the most fun I'd had well…since Jazz's and my reunion.

She hadn't complained once and I thought that might be because secretly she liked being beautiful and flaunting her new looks around the house. She reveled in attention. Edward had tried to insist that she was shallow but that wasn't my take and I scolded him for being petty. I felt like she was just confident in her looks. And why shouldn't she be? There was no question she was gorgeous. All she had to do was look in a mirror and there was all the confirmation she needed. She never said anything but deep down I thought that part of the reason she was so tolerant of me and my ministrations was that she appreciated me, another female, taking up for her. Plus, I was nothing to be threatened by in the looks department. I was "safe" for her to be around and only making her shine that much more brightly.

So now here Esme and I stood in the middle of the luxurious private showroom in YSL and as I felt the creamy ivory silk and lace frothy concoction slide over my head fitting perfectly to my body, I felt unbridled joy. I danced out of the dressing room.

Before I even looked in the mirror I knew I'd found my wedding dress just by looking at Esme's face. She was beaming and her golden eyes were bright as if there would be tears in them if she could cry. "So?" I breathed softly. "So," she said back confidently, pride in her voice. "You look so beautiful Alice honey." And from her tone I knew she meant it.

She'd taken to calling me "Alice honey" as if it was my whole name and every time she did I felt the warm fuzzies. Just like when Jazz called me Pixie. I'd never imagined having nicknames could be such a thrilling experience. But it was just something that I imagined a well-loved human girl would have. Nicknames from those who loved her. Terms of endearment.

I curled my bare toes into the luxuriant carpet beneath my feet. I was scared I might float away, I was so full of happiness and love. If my skin wasn't as hard as marble, I might pinch myself to see if this was all really happening. I sighed in amazement. Esme had said I was beautiful. _Me_, not the dress! And she was looking at me like I'd always imagined a mother would look at a daughter. If she loved that daughter. And she'd been with me every step of the way in the planning of my elaborate grandiose plans for my real "human" wedding. She'd seemed to take as much joy as I had in each plan that we'd made.

Unwittingly, I felt the darkness rising up to grab me and pull me back into reality. It was really more than a freak like me deserved. I mean if I'd been such a great human daughter would I have woken up like this? A monster? Alone and unable to remember even a hint of a loving mother or father or _anything_ about my human life? Great, I had been a colossal disappointment as a human. Perhaps this wedding was all wrong. It was silly to try and recapture something I'd never known and probably hadn't known as a human either. I mean, I knew I was making Jazz be a part of huge production that he really didn't want. But he loved me and was trying to make me happy.

I didn't have any family or friends or anyone outside of the Cullens to invite. Why was I trying so blasted hard to do this? Especially when I was the only one who wanted it. I looked down at the miles of lace and silk billowing around me and delicately stroked the material. And I did. I wanted it badly. The dress, the flowers, Carlisle giving me away, smooshing cake into Jasper's mouth, the kiss sealing that I was his for eternity. But I didn't deserve it. Perhaps I should just stop pushing.

Esme's smile faltered as she sensed a shadow fall over me. Hesitantly she stepped forward, careful of the delicate material belled out around me. "Alice honey, what's wrong? Are you okay? If you don't like the dress, you don't have to get it. We'll try others." My throat constricted with emotion at her kind tone. The depth of her love was more than I'd ever envisioned.

I swallowed finding my voice and looked up into her pretty face framed by her caramel-colored waves. I saw the concern etched there. My words still came out in a whisper. "No. It's perfect. I love it. I just…" I hesitated, unsure of how much to reveal. Jasper thought it was cute that I struggled not to erupt like a volcano spewing whatever was in my head in quick succession out my mouth. I found that compulsion utterly annoying and horrifying. Edward would just lean forward and pinch my lips shut with his thumb and forefinger saving everyone but himself from my musings.

But he wasn't here now. And I had the urge to spill my guts to Esme. About everything I was feeling—the doubts, the fears, the guilt. She already felt so much like the mother I'd never remembered. And in my mind I imagined that daughters shared things with their mothers. Things like I was feeling. But I wasn't totally sure. That's what I _wanted_ to do with my mom.

I'd forgotten the salesgirl in the corner. Esme stepped forward and put a comforting arm around my shoulders, bare in the strapless gown. She looked at the petite French blonde and said "We'll take this one." Then before I knew what has happening, we were back on the street heading back to the Champs Elysees, a giant YSL box in her arms. She guided us to an outdoor café.

"Garcon, deux cafes, sil-vous plait." She never took her eyes from mine as she ordered and both my hands were in her strong grip as she sat across from me at the tiny black metal table. I looked down at our clasped hands, my eyes catching my spectacular ring. I felt my stomach tighten sickeningly at the sight. I was already a nervous wreck! Maybe Emmett had been right to bet Jasper that I would be the next one to run out on us.

Jasper had agreed to the bet, telling me later as we lay on our feather mattress looking up at the constellations through our glass ceiling, that it was the easiest bet he would ever win. "Why?" I'd asked, rolling onto my side to look into his face. His mouth had shot up in my favorite lop-sided smile and he'd turned his head to meet my eyes. "Because pixie, you're a sure thing." Then he'd leaned forward and kissed me and I'd forgotten all about how I was going to ask him what being a "sure thing" meant.

Now sitting across from Esme, I wished I'd remembered to ask later because I was pretty sure that what I was feeling made me the furthest thing from a "sure thing" there ever was. In fact, I wished I'd told Jazz that he should never bet on freaky, amnesiac, vision girls. Hadn't he learned by now we were unreliable? And he was sure to lose his bet. All because of his misplaced faith in me.

**Esme's POV**

Nothing was grander than Paris in April. But the initial exhilaration of strolling down the Champs Elysees had long faded. Something was very wrong with Alice. And she hadn't said a word about it yet. She'd looked so absolutely stunning in her wedding gown. And not just because of the dress although it was an amazing piece of art. I was glad I'd had Carlisle call that favor in. It was entirely worth the price tag. But it'd also been the light radiating from within her and out her beautiful topaz eyes, lighting up her heart-shaped face. It'd been breathtaking. But just as quickly, I'd seen that light extinguish. And I still didn't know why.

And so here we were. I'd somehow managed to get her dressed, get the gown paid for and wrapped and lead her to the outdoor café we were sitting at now. It was amazing how good you could be at multi-tasking and shepherding your children when you were a mother. And to think I'd at one time believed my dream of being mother was a dead one. In my human life. What a blessing in disguise my hopelessness had been, leading me to the family I'd dreamed of. One that would be mine for eternity.

And like any good mother, I was beyond panicked at the hopelessness I saw in Alice's eyes now. You never wanted to see that look in your child's eyes. But you could never let them know how panicked you really were. Luckily for me, spending decades with my always-calm-in-a-crisis husband had rubbed off on me a little. So I had clasped her hands to stop the trembling I'd seen there, trying to channel whatever support, concern I could to her. I don't think she'd even been aware of any of it.

Her eyes staring unseeingly down at the ring that Carlisle had first given me in honor of the "birth" of Rose and as thanks for helping as best as I could in comforting Rosalie on the loss of the dream of motherhood. I hadn't been entirely successful but she'd been able to get past her bitterness enough to attempt to be a part of the family. It was a bond that she and I shared that could never be understood by the boys.

I thought it would be a nice touch to have Carlisle give the ring to Jasper as her engagement ring, making Alice a part of our mother-daughter circle. Rose had a matching necklace that Carlisle had given her at the time he'd given me the ring. So now each of my daughters had an outward symbol of our love for them.

And I did understand now what mothers meant when they said they loved their children the same. I felt that same way about all five of mine. They were all very different and distinct in their own unique and beautiful ways. They each brought something different to the table, their own gifts, abilities, personalities. And I loved each and every one of them. Equally. Because of that. And I hated to see any one of them suffer, just as I knew Alice was suffering now. I'd do anything to protect my children, ensure their happiness. I had to figure out what was wrong, how I could help.

"Alice honey, do you want to tell me what's wrong?" I spoke softly, gently, not wanting to pressure her too much. Her gaze slowly met mine and she looked so forlorn, so sad, that I got really worried. I squeezed her hand slightly and ran my thumb over her ring. I had an idea.

"Hey, did I ever tell you about when Carlisle gave me this ring?" I knew I hadn't and was pretty sure she didn't know the ring had belonged to me. That was confirmed by the surprise in her eyes. She silently shook her head. "Well, Carlisle gave me this ring when Rose became part of our family. It was a difficult transition for her." She was looking at me intently now, engrossed in the story. I could see curiosity in her eyes and I knew my Alice. I was sure she had a million questions that she wanted to burst out with but was purposely holding back, letting me tell her the story at my own pace.

"You see, I was the one who was finally able to break through the wall of resentment Rosalie had built around herself. Carlisle had hoped she'd be a good companion for Edward, perhaps even sharing the immediate connection that Carlisle and I had felt when he turned me. But from the beginning, they were like oil and water. As you well know." I gave her a knowing smile and she gave a small grin back, nodding in affirmation.

My smile faded as I asked, "You know how Rose came to be with us? The circumstances?" She nodded matching my somberness. "So you can see it would have been a rough transition no matter what. But that loss of her dream of being a wife and mother, especially a mother—well, that was a devastation I could understand." She squeezed my hands reassuringly and I saw the sympathy in her eyes. She knew what was coming next. I wouldn't have to say much, but I wanted to. I wanted her to understand.

"Alice honey, you have to know this. You, Jasper, Edward, Emmett, Rose. You are the greatest joys of my life. You have made my dreams come true beyond my wildest expectations." I could see a bit of doubt in her eyes. Mother's instinct--I knew that was because she'd never experienced a mother's love. Not that she remembered anyway. I had to teach her what it was all about.

"To be a mother—it was what I wanted most in the world. And when I lost my baby, well, I can't describe to you the absolute devastation, hopelessness…how it absolutely took away my will to live." Her eyes were bright. I knew she was feeling what I felt. Her visions gave her an insight that made the experiences even more real for her as she relived them in her mind.

"Oh Esme!" Her soft whisper full of the anguish I'd felt. I smiled reassuringly. "No dear, you see, it's okay. Carlisle saving me, giving me this life with all of you…it's been my best life lived. Human memories, they fade honey, become hazy. But my memories I make with each of you…well, those I have for eternity." She smiled then, and I could see the understanding starting to grow in her eyes.

"So one of my best memories is when Carlisle gave me your ring. Rose and I had made significant progress and our mother-daughter relationship had grown. She was healing a little. After…" My voice trailed off. Alice nodded in understanding, knowing my reference was to Rosalie's moment of vengeance. "Anyway, Carlisle wanted to honor our growing bond, give us an outward symbol of our connection. So he gave me the ring and Rose has a matching necklace."

Alice breathed out, "Really? Oh Esme, that's beautiful. But I can't keep this. What would Rose think? Besides, this belongs with you." She tugged her hands from mine and reached to slide the ring from her finger. Quickly, I reached out grabbing her hand and stopping her. "Alice honey, no!" Her eyes met mine startled at my vehemence.

"This ring belongs to _you_. I didn't tell you this for you to return the ring. I told you this so you would know how very much I love you and how very much I want _both_ of my daughters to have these outward symbols of my connection to each of you. That's why Carlisle and I gave the ring to Jasper. Trust me, Rose has plenty of baubles to make her happy. She won't resent you for just this one." I smiled hoping to convey my earnestness, my desire for her to wear the ring.

I continued, "I can't think of a better way for you and Jasper to start your lives together and as part of our family than this wedding . You are my daughter. For better or worse. And for you to wear this ring, well, it makes me feel like I've passed on a family heirloom which means that you both can't back out now. You're stuck with us _and_ each other." I saw her take in a sharp breath and a slow smile spread across her bow-shaped lips, lighting up her features. I felt relief. I'd gotten through to her.

Then before I knew it, we were both standing and she was in my arms in a tight embrace. She was shorter than me and I rested my cheek on top of her head and rubbed her back soothingly. "Oh Esme," she whispered. "I _do_ feel like your daughter! And I'm honored to wear your ring. I'm doing the right thing, aren't I?" Now this was something I could do. A mother's approval could go a long way in making her children happy. "Oh Alice honey, absolutely! I couldn't be prouder."

And there in the middle of the night, in the middle of Paris with the lights on the Eiffel Tower twinkling in the background and tourists all around, a mother and daughter bonded. And it didn't matter if we were vampires, because I'd never felt more human in my life. Either of them.


	20. Anticipation

Wow, I am so glad to have this chapter done! It took FOREVER! Anyway, not the best I've ever written, but it moves things along to where they need to be. Thanks to all for reading and reviewing . Please keep it up! It's so very satisfying and motivating! Also, thanks to those who've recommended me to others! Also, to my Texas friends, my deepest apologies for putting my Okie spin on Texas talk! But Red River rivalry and all, lol! But I do love me some Texas boys (especially if they're named Jasper!) I hope you enjoy this chapter, I tried to keep the vernacular to a minimum, lol! Until, the next chapter, dear readers!

Disclaimer: I am writing this story because I am a fan of Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight Saga. I do not own any of the characters, plot lines or any Twilight-related materials.

Visions of Love

Chapter 20: Anticipation

**Jasper's POV**

I was getting married tomorrow. Me. Jasper Whitlock. Excuse me, Jasper Hale. My lips lifted at the faux pas. It was going to take some getting used to. The name, not the marriage. Oh the whole wedding production, _that_ I could live without. But my pixie, _that_ I could not. And this wedding was going to make her happy. And that made me happy. After tomorrow, I'd have her all to myself for eternity. A bond that could not be broken. At least that was the plan. And the anticipation was killing me. I just was ready to get it done.

I still found it all a little hard to believe. In fact, I was pondering it all on the bank of the creek that ran in the woods behind the Cullen house. The running water soothed me, helped me think better. Gave me something to focus on than all the crazy emotions that had been stirring in the house the past couple of weeks as the buzz of activity had grown to a fever pitch with all of the wedding preparations.

I'd just needed to get away from the chaos and heightened emotion in the house. I had to admit that it was all making my own nerves a little frazzled. Plus, I was afraid if I stuck around any longer, Alice might make me try on that monkey suit I had to wear tomorrow. Yet again. Seriously, I could have used that thing as a torture device for the newborns under my command if I'd only known!

So I'd come out here only feeling slightly guilty when I heard my pixie calling my name. I'd justified it by saying that I was already at the tree line. I knew it wouldn't be a real secret as to where I was going. She could search it out fairly quickly. But I was also just as sure that I was avoiding some type of torturous wedding activity. I'd never had a drill sergeant as scary as my pixie. I really could have used her back in the day. I was sure there would've been a different outcome to the war.

My mind drifted to how different my life was before. Before Alice. I picked up a handful of small smooth stones and started skipping them across the creek. It was entirely gratifying to see the cool way I could barely flick my wrist and have a stone skim rapidly—faster than a human eye would be able to see—across the creek before pinging and ricocheting against a tree on the other side, bark flying off where the stone struck. So for all the drawbacks of the whole craving human blood thing, there were moments that I felt a little like a comic book hero.

I chuckled at the thought. But with great power came great responsibility. That was in a Spiderman comic that Emmett had shared with me. Emmett had really helped me loosen up, especially over the past month, as the wedding planning had intensified. When you hung out with Emmett, you didn't have to have deep conversations or even think too much.

Hell, you didn't even have to talk at all. Just laugh at his jokes or take him on in some type of competition whether it be wrestling or boxing (much to Esme's dismay) or making stupid little bets over anything. He especially liked bets if it involved our abilities such as who could make it to the peninsula and back the fastest (usually Edward) or who would win at chess between Alice and Edward (usually Alice).

Our first bet had been about the wedding. For some reason, Emmett was convinced Alice was going to leave me. I'd taken the bet quickly knowing that it would be the easiest money I'd ever made. But I had felt a twinge, deep down, because there was a teeny tiny part of me that thought he was right. It was really hard to believe that she would want to be with me, bind herself to me forever through matrimony. I still didn't see it. But I wanted her. Whether I deserved her or not. For the second time in my life I was going to be completely selfish. I was desperate to hold onto her whatever it took.

I felt a blackness rise up inside me as I thought about the first time I'd done something completely selfish. Leaving Maria. I couldn't help but shiver at the memory. So actually there was something scarier than my pixie in full drill sergeant mode. Maria. My maker. That last moment when I'd told her I was leaving. I didn't regret it. Not in the least. But it had taken all of my strength to build up to that moment and I still don't think I would have been able to do it if it hadn't been for Peter and Charlotte's encouragement.

I didn't feel the same familial bond with them that I did with my new family. But I did feel a connection to them. They knew me in a way that not even Alice could know. They knew me at my scariest, my most evil. That bond of survival in battle _and_ surviving life with Maria was a different kind of camaraderie. Hard to explain. Especially to my pixie. I hated the idea of her knowing just how bad I'd been. She did of course and still loved me in spite of it. Which was what left me in awe and made me willing to put on the monkey suit and do the pretty if that's how she wanted it.

Lost in my thoughts, I didn't hear her approach. But I felt her behind me all the same. I'd know her anywhere. "Jazz?" She said softly. I turned my head slightly and saw her mere inches behind me. I was losing my touch. I shook my head and smiled ruefully realizing that I'd be in real trouble if I had to go into battle today. "Hey pixie." I patted the ground beside me in an unspoken invitation and in a flash she was at my side, her tiny hand slipping into my large one.

"Whatcha doing?" Her words were light but her tone was heavy. I didn't need Edward's ability to know that she was worried I was contemplating running out on her again. I sighed heavily. Winning her trust back was not an easy task. I supposed my ill-advised side trip across Alaska weeks earlier would always haunt us in some way.

I looked down at her, hoping my gaze was reassuring and smiled lop-sidedly at her. "Just thinking. It was getting a little crazy. I just needed to clear my head a bit." She smiled back brightly and squeezed my hand. "Oh." I lifted our joined hands and placed a light kiss on the back of hers, again trying to reassure her. Wanting her to know, she couldn't shake me. Her smile grew wider and the light was back in her eyes. I felt relief flood through me. I wasn't sure if it was my relief or hers. Sometimes emotions got all jumbled up inside me.

Her smile faded a bit and I saw some uncertainty creep back into her eyes. "Is this too much?" I knew what she was asking. The wedding. Marrying her. Living the vegetarian lifestyle. All of it. "Nope. Not a bit." The smooth lie left my lips. Wow, I even almost convinced myself with that. I mean I was more than okay with marrying her, but the rest, well, that was going to take a little time. Or a lot of time. "Good. I'm glad." Her words came out in a whisper. Like they did when she was having a hard time trusting. Trusting that good things should happen to her, for her. I hated that even the smallest action of mine-- like running to the creek--could cause her a moment of unhappiness.

I needed to lighten the moment. Bring a genuine smile back to her face. My favorite way to see her. Well, my second favorite. My first favorite usually involved a more dreamy expression after a good round of deep, hard…well, you get the picture. I felt the fire blaze up inside me at the thought. I saw her eyes widen as if reading what I was planning to do next. Hell's bells, who was I kidding? _Of course_ she knew! She always knew what my next move was. It could really cramp a guy's romantic style. But I didn't mind. It was actually kind of comforting. As if she knew me better than I knew myself.

I brought my free hand up and cupped her cheek. She nuzzled it a bit which would have sent my pulse racing if I'd had one. I bent my head intending to capture her lips but at the last moment one of my favorite memories popped in my head and instead I rubbed my nose against hers. "Eskimo kiss," I whispered. Her eyes lit up with her own memory and a husky laugh escaped her lips. Then she met my lips and her tongue darted to meet mine, dancing with mine in a rhythm all our own. Delicious tingles ran up and down my spine. I wasn't sure who broke away first, but slightly breathy, she whispered back, "Texas kiss." I threw my head back and roared with laughter, her tinkling bell laugh matching my own and echoing around us in the trees. God, I couldn't wait to make this woman my wife.

"Oh pixie. What am I going to do with you?" Suddenly her laughter stopped and her face grew serious. "Marry me?" Her voice lilted questioningly, lightly. But it wasn't a light question. I put both my hands on her face cradling her head, tilting it so I could look her full in the eyes. "Without a doubt." My tone came out fierce. "Tomorrow can't come soon enough." Ah, there was that brilliant smile I loved so much. "For me either." I dropped my hands, putting an arm around her and tucking her into my side. Where she belonged.

"Aren't you going to miss all the wedding planning?" I asked casually. She seemed so enthralled by the whole process. "Oh, that. Well, it just means I have to find another reason for the next party to plan." She grinned up at me. I chuckled. "Honey, I'm sure you will. And heaven help the next poor sap caught in your web. Just make me one promise. Don't let the next one involve formal wear." She laughed then. I could live on her laugh alone.

Her voice cut through my reverie on all of the things about her I could live on. "Sooo. I think the boys have a big night planned for you." Unwittingly, a groan escaped my lips. "Please tell me that they are not planning anything crazy." She giggled at my reluctance. "Depends on what you mean by crazy, cowboy." I cut my eyes down to her, a brow arched. She giggled again. "I'm sure you'll have fun. Fun that I approve of." She sounded smug. Well, I guess that meant strip clubs were out of the picture. Hopefully that meant Edward would be able to reign Emmett in who had talked of nothing else for the past week. Probably had thrown the temptation of hunting polar bears at him. I made a mental note to thank Edward.

"What about you?" I asked. "Big plans?" A mysterious smile touched her lips. "Oh, I think Rose and Esme have it under control." I was sure they did as long as they followed whatever plan Alice had drawn up to the tee. That was my pixie. I'd never met a more persuasive woman in my life. Of course, I didn't need much persuading to make her my wife tomorrow. "I can't wait to marry you tomorrow, pixie." I hadn't meant to blurt the words out like that. I guess she was rubbing off on me in lots of ways. She smiled up at me. "I can't wait to marry you either. The anticipation is killing me!" I knew the feeling.

Just as I was about to bend down and seal the deal with another delicious kiss, I felt myself being lifted off the ground. "Oh no you don't soldier! No hanky-panky before the honeymoon." Emmett! Damn him! Timing was not his strong suit. His guffaw rocked the trees and the next thing I knew I was upside down over his shoulder watching the trees dart by at an alarming rate. "EMMETT!" I roared. "Put me down." His only response was to laugh harder.

I swiveled my head and sure enough there was Edward right beside us, his bronze hair looking even messier as it blew in the wind. He was laughing too. Great, no help there. Well, I had two options. I could rip him limb from limb. Or I could sit back and enjoy the ride. As attractive as option one was sounding as I was jostled against his stone hard shoulder, I knew I'd have to answer to Esme and Rosalie if I chose that option. And Alice would never forgive me for ruining our wedding by starting a family feud.

Well, I guess it wouldn't hurt to see what they might have in store for me on my last night of bachelorhood. In fact, it might be kind of fun. Plus, on the bright side, I wouldn't be forced to put the monkey suit on again. Until my wedding at least. And then I just sat back and enjoyed the ride, anticipating the shenanigans my two brothers had planned for me. With Alice's seal of approval naturally.

**Emmett's POV**

I wanted polar bears. Edward wanted mountain lions. Alice wanted us back in time for the wedding. Well, let's just say that you should always bet on Bridezilla. So we'd hijacked Jasper and were headed deep into the Tongass National Park. I'd hauled Jasper on my shoulder most of the way and had finally let him down now that I was sure he wouldn't run back to Alice. Now that we were here, I _might_ be able to find a grizzly if I was lucky but there was sure to be plenty of brown bears. And Edward could hunt lynxes. Not as stimulating as mountain lions but we'd have Jasper back standing in front of the minister before Alice could say "I do" and that was the main thing.

My tiny new sister was a little fearsome when she was on the warpath. And the past week had been one long warpath with tons of chores and no fun. Rose had said it was good for me but I'd been looking forward to tonight. Nothing was more exhilarating than hunting, completely giving over to your senses. It was a freedom like no other and one in which I could test myself time and again. I loved seeing how far I could push myself. Just as long as I didn't go that one step too far and start hunting hikers. Carlisle wouldn't appreciate that.

Plus, Rose kept reminding me that I needed to be a good role model for Jasper. He was struggling with the whole veggie diet. I guess. I hadn't really seen any problems there. My philosophy was if you thought about it too much and doubted your ability to restrain yourself, you were just setting yourself up for failure. So best not to think about it, just revel in the thrill of the hunt no matter what you were hunting. And, jeez, lighten up! Both Jasper and Edward tended to dwell on the dark side if you asked me. Not that anyone ever did. That was all right.

I knew they all thought I wasn't the deepest river running in the house. But really the only opinion I cared about was Rose's and she seemed okay with how I was. In fact, I knew she liked it when I displayed my physical strengths. A lot. She wasn't shy about showing me her appreciation either. Which really was my main reason for wanting to best my brothers all the time. I loved seeing that look of fierce pride in Rose's eyes. Among other things. As I drew in a deep breath and got my first scent of bear, my instincts took over and it was awhile before any more thoughts popped in my head.

I was deep in the drink of a fairly large brown bear I'd come across so I wasn't really paying much attention to anything else, reliving the thrill of bringing the big bear down. Next thing I knew I was on my back looking up at my newest brother grinning down at me. "Gotcha!" Oh hell no! I started to bring my arms up to push him off of me when I realized he'd pinned my arms to my sides and he was not budging. Pretty nifty trick. I was at his mercy. It was so much fun having a soldier for a brother. His strategy knew no limits. I was constantly trying to think of ways to best him. So far, we were about even.

I noticed a small trickle of blood in the corner of his mouth. See, he seemed to be adjusting to the lifestyle just fine. I still didn't see what everyone was so worried about. I went limp, pretending to give up to take him off guard but in the next second a blue blur came out of nowhere launching into Jazz. Edward. They both hit a massive boulder and the deafening crack echoed all around as the boulder shattered like glass. Pretty cool!

I couldn't let them have all the fun so I began picking up the larger pieces of rubble and began heaving it at the wrestling pair, laughing when the rocks busted into even smaller stones against their backs. Finally, they both turned, roared and charged me at the same time. When they hit me, all three of us went soaring into a pine tree knocking us to the ground. There was a huge cracking sound and the next thing I knew, the tree had fallen on top of the three of us as we lay on the ground gasping.

"Oof". Air was forcibly expelled from all three of us and then we just turned our heads, surprise in our eyes and I couldn't help but roar with laughter. Edward and Jasper joined in. Soon we had what my grandpappy in the Appalachians would have called the church house giggles, meaning we couldn't stop even if we wanted to. And it felt good! With all the tension over the wedding preparations the past few days, and Alice's constant threats of bodily harm for any minor infraction, well, it felt good just to be guys and blow off some steam. I heaved the trunk off of us with one hand and watched satisfied as it landed a good two hundred feet in front of us in the middle of the clearing we'd just been in.

Finally, our laughter died down and we lay there in a companionable silence for who knew how long. I put my hands behind my head and just looked up at the night sky. It was one of those nights where the stars seemed to shimmer in different colors, all shades of blues and greens and pinks. It was really beautiful and made me think of Rose. I wished she was with me now. Maybe we should head back a little early. It was Jasper's big day after all.

"Uh, guys." I started a little at the baritone sound of Jasper's voice. He really didn't talk much and rarely started conversations so I wasn't expecting it. "I just wanted to thank you for tonight. I never really have had the freedom to just have fun. And well, that's what tonight's been. Fun." I reached out and punched him as hard as I could in the arm closest to me. "No prob, bro. Besides, anything was better than spending one more minute around all those flowers and ribbons and being Alice's whipping boy."

At first I thought I might have offended him as his eyebrow shot up but then he just chuckled. "Yep, she can be a little tyrant. But after tomorrow, she'll by _my_ little tyrant." I noticed that Edward was completely quiet and still, just looking up at the sky, his arms crossed across his chest. Poor guy. Probably felt left out what with all the love going around.

He turned his head, a sardonic look on his face as he stared at me. "Hardly." His tone was dry. Oops. Oh well, he was used to my mental slip-ups by now. Then he chuckled. "Uh-huh. You're mentally deficient all right." I growled and made as if to pounce. As quick as a cat, he was on his feet and dancing like a boxer around the ring. "Bring it." He laughed.

Then Jasper broke in, "Um, listen guys. If you don't mind, do you think we could head back now? Otherwise we'll be out here all night. And well, I was kind of hoping to surprise Alice into letting me see her one last time before the wedding." I grinned at him lasciviously and waggled my eyebrows. I knew what he was hoping to talk her into and he didn't have a prayer. Edward grinned and shook his head at me, reading my thoughts and Jasper's. But in his usual Edward fashion, he wasn't spilling any details. I wished I could convince him that discretion wasn't _always_ the better part of valor.

Shooting me one last warning look, Edward clapped a hand against Jazz's shoulder. "Sure Jazz. Not a problem. I'm sure you're dying with anticipation for tomorrow's festivities." Jasper grinned in response. "I've never been more ready for anything in my life." Ugh, I hope I hadn't acted as smitten when Rose and I had married. Edward laughed, throwing me that annoying smug all-knowing look he got. He couldn't help himself from getting one last dig at me. "Hate to break it to you Em, but you were worse!" I growled and showed him my fist while replaying in my mind a particularly gratifying time I'd actually been able to get a jump on him. He laughed in response.

Jazz looked at us both like we were crazy and then I had to laugh as Jazz stood looking at us like we lost our damn minds, I finally pulled myself together to slap him on the back and say "Let's head home boys. Besides, I need to see if I've won my bet and Alice has finally come to her senses and run off on _you_ this time!" And then we were darting through the trees, our carefree laughter bouncing around the trees.

If we'd only known that was the last time we'd laugh for a long while, I might have laughed a little longer and harder than I did. And I would've never made that crack about Alice running off.


	21. Tracking

I'm really sorry it took so long to update! Work is really crazy this time of year. Believe it or not, dear readers, we are well over 50,000 words into this story now! I can't believe it. And I am entirely flabbergasted by how many of you have added me to your favorites/alerts. As always, please review! It is really some great motivation! I can't stand to disappoint you since you seem to love Alice and Jasper as much as I do. So this chapter is dedicated to my mom who gave me my love of reading and writing and thinks that everything I write is great, even when it's crap. I love you, Mom, Happy Mother's Day!

Disclaimer: I am writing this story because I am a fan of Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight Saga. I do not own any of the characters, plot lines or any Twilight-related materials.

Visions of Love

Chapter 21: Tracking

**Alice's POV**

She was coming. This I was sure of.

I'd panicked when the vision of my dream wedding that I had so painstakingly planned, suddenly vanished. Poof. Just like that. My first thought was that Jasper had changed his mind. I was sure Emmett had said or done something to turn poor Jazz's cold feet into blocks of ice.

So I started searching for the reason my lovely wedding vision vanished and I saw her.

She was breathtakingly beautiful with her luxuriously long black hair that fell to her waist in waves and a figure that curved in all the right places. But her eyes. Crimson. Determined. Cruel. I knew instantly who she was. I'd seen her before although I'd never met her.

Maria. Jasper's maker. "Alice, what is it? Are you having a vision?" Rosalie's voice broke through my reverie. I must have had that blank look on my face that sometimes came over me when seeing certain visions. She confirmed my look when she muttered, "You're definitely in the Twilight Zone." I shook my head slightly to clear it, forcing my eyes to focus on Rose.

I couldn't believe this was happening the night before the wedding! I _knew_ it was too good to be true. No. I had to stop her. I couldn't let her ruin everything. Then it was clear what I should do. Jasper wouldn't approve. Neither would Edward. Luckily for me, they were still gone. Jazz's "bachelor party." Pretty tame stuff by human standards. Which had been more than okay with me. My main requirement was that they have Jazz back in time for the wedding. Emmett had been miffed, having his heart set on hunting polar bears. But I'd been adamant. And now I wished they _had_ gone further north.

"Alice!" Rose's fingers snapped in front of my face. My eyes met her sharp gaze. Not much escaped her attention. It was just a matter of if it was of any interest to her. She usually lost interest quickly if it didn't involve her in some way. Or Emmett. But mostly her. "Is it the boys? Did something happen to them? _Please_ tell me that Emmett didn't plan some idiotic, hare-brained…what am I saying? Of course he did! All right, what'd he do this time?" Her hard gaze was studying my face and before I could stop myself I guiltily glanced away.

No way could I tell her what I was thinking about doing. As much as Rosalie loved herself, she was all about protecting the family and thus her own self-interests. She'd tell Carlisle and Esme. And they would try to stop me. I had to convince her that everything was fine.

We were in her gigantic marble bathroom on the second floor, playing around with makeup and hairstyles for the wedding. Of course, everything we had tried had made her look a million times more beautiful than me. Good thing I was the one wearing the white dress or everyone would have thought Rosalie was the bride. But of course, me getting to wear the white dress, well—that was going to have to entail some fancy footwork on my part. Literally and figuratively. The best tact might be to convince Rose that I needed some time alone. You know, contemplating the biggest day of my life. That kind of thing.

"You know Rose, I think I'm going to go up to my room for awhile." Rose's eyes narrowed, suspicious. I kept my own steady, willing myself not to flinch, to give anything away. I hurriedly added, "I mean, obviously, you're going to look gorgeous tomorrow. And well—I think we've done all we can with…with this." I gestured with my hand, making a sweeping motion down my short frame.

My compliment of Rosalie while pointing out my inferiority had the desired effect. The haughty, prideful look was back in her eyes, any hint o f suspicion gone. I quickly searched out my future and a surge of confidence rose up as I realized that my plan to be alone was going to work. And if there was any chance for a happy ending for me and my soldier, it had better.

I had left Rosalie thumbing through one of the scads of hairstyle magazines we'd gotten, mostly to choose flattering up-dos for Rose and Esme, with their luscious flowing locks. My hair would just be spiky, sticking out all over the place, per usual. It really wasn't fair! Oh, if the only thing I had to worry about was my hair! Focus Alice!

I may have told her only half of the truth but I did need to go up to the tower room. I had to carefully think through my next steps. And do a little vision-searching, the part I'd left out telling Rose. In all of my existence, I'd never been so relieved to be freaky vision vampire girl as I was at that moment.

In a matter of seconds, I was cross-legged in the middle of Jazz's and my feather mattress. I couldn't allow myself even a moment to indulge in some of my favorite memories of our time together, shared right here. First, I had to search out the guys and see when they might be coming back. I figured Edward would be the safest to search. He'd most likely know when they would be returning. I focused all of my energy on my brother, searching out his immediate future.

Based on what he and Emmett had planned, it looked like they weren't going to be back here until tomorrow morning. I glanced at my watch. That should give me about a twelve hour head start. Next was to search out Maria, see where she was now. She was coming from the Canadian side. And she was much too close. Of course Maria on Mars would be too close for my tastes. She would be here in a matter of hours. I had no time to waste.

Upon searching Maria's future, I found that she had discovered where Jasper was from his friends, Peter and Charlotte. They were in Vancouver, Canada. I felt my brow crease upon this revelation. And it was all my fault. It'd seemed harmless sending them a wedding invitation. After all, they were Jazz's oldest friends. Even if he had been adamant that he didn't want them there.

At the time, I'd chalked it up to him wanting a clean break from his past. I also had thought that part of his reluctance had to do with Peter and Charlotte's typical vampire diet. I'd tried to tell him that Carlisle would understand, wouldn't mind as long as they hunted at a safe distance, but he'd just shrugged his shoulders and shook his head firmly. I hadn't pressed then, knowing that in his mind the subject was closed and he wouldn't say any more on the subject.

I tried not to show my hurt but there was no doubt that I felt shut out of that part of his life. That's why I hadn't told him that I'd sent them the invitation any way. I knew it wasn't rational. I knew he didn't want to expose me to his past or anything he felt remotely dangerous. And of course, a _tiny_ part of me warmed at his protectiveness. But the bigger, more selfish part of me felt like the girl in the corner at the party that no one talked to. I felt left out. Untrusted. Scared. Scared that his old life had a much bigger hold on him than either he _or_ I realized.

Which is why I did not want that bitch Maria anywhere near my soldier, trying to sink her claws into him. She wasn't coming to destroy him. She was coming to destroy me. She wanted him back. She had some new grand plans to rule not only Mexico but all of Central America. And she was convinced her success hinged on Jasper's returning to her. _This_ was coming through crystal clear.

As I felt my stomach tighten at the thought of Jasper with Maria, I couldn't help but wonder how in the world I was going to stop that from happening. A germ of an idea began to form. Who knew Maria at least as well as Jasper? Peter and Charlotte! And they were close…close enough for me to reach in a short period of time. And I could use all of the help I could get. I'd seen Maria's plans for domination and they caused an involuntary shudder to rack my body. It was not pretty.

And I was unsure if Jasper would be able to resist her once she was within his proximity. But if Peter and Charlotte were here, backing him up, like before, the first he left her…well, then that might give me the best chance at having my dream wedding.

I'd tracked them down once. Hopefully Maria wouldn't scare them away from where I'd found them. I wasn't sure I had enough time to track them down again. But first, I had needed to leave something behind. Something that would show Jazz that I wasn't leaving him for good but it couldn't be a note. Otherwise he'd try to follow me and that would never do. And then it came to me. I dashed to Carlisle's study so that I could take the first step in getting my dream wedding and most importantly, my dream honeymoon with my warrior vampire back.

**Maria's POV**

I needed to go faster if I was going to stop the wedding. Wedding! I snorted in disgust. Such a human convention! I would have never imagined Jasper Whitlock participating in such an absurdity. I had to admit that my curiosity had been piqued about what kind of creature could have possibly connived him to do such a thing.

Well, any vampire who would give in to such fanciful ideas like weddings would be no match for me. And once she was out of my way, there would be nothing standing in the way of Jasper returning to me. It had been a blow when he left. I couldn't deny that. My army had slowly disintegrated, my territory eroded. I hadn't realized until he was gone how much I needed him, his ability—manipulating emotions—how effective that had made him in controlling the newborns. I even missed his strength, his strategy. There was no doubt Jasper Whitlock had been born to soldier. And I needed my best general back.

I'd known if I found those weak cowards, Peter and Charlotte, I'd find Jasper. I had expected him to be with those two imbeciles. And he had not been. I'd tracked them north finally finding them in Vancouver. Canada! How very…boring. I liked the heat and spice of the south. Snow, pine trees and pasty humans—bah! It must be the cold but my most recent meals had consisted of thick, sluggish blood. I'd tried two or three different ones to test, see if it was an anomaly. But they all tasted the same. I might as well have eaten a moose! Maybe they needed more spice in their diet.

Speaking of which, I really needed to feed again, gather strength for what was to come. Okay, maybe need was too strong. I _wanted_ to feed again. Better safe than sorry. Jasper wouldn't be pleased. And he could be fierce when he got into his misplaced sense of protectiveness. But that was okay. I could be fiercer when I wanted something. And I wanted Jasper Whitlock. He was my key to my new reign.

I smiled widely, displaying my full set of razor-sharp teeth as I thought of the first night I'd come across Jasper under a Texas full moon. Not too unlike the moon shining down on me as I darted through the Canadian forest. But of course warmer. I'd known he was special, even then in his weak human form. But after I turned him—well—then I knew he was going to be magnificent. And he was. For nearly 90 years. Until those fools, Peter and Charlotte preyed on his emotions. His one vulnerability

Oh, I had to admit, I'd been getting a little bored with him. All that melancholy! It could really bring a girl down and all that questioning about if what we were doing was right. I'd tried to show him that we were gods and gods didn't have to worry about right and wrong. We took what we wanted. When we wanted. _How_ we wanted. But no matter what tactics I used to pull him out of his depression—either tempting him with my body or giving him the pick of our spoils of war(even trying to tempt him into fun games with our human spoils)—none of it worked. In fact, he kept getting worse.

Toward the end, I'd even considered disposing of him as I had done with Nettie and Lucy, my companions before Jasper. They'd been with me the night I'd turned him but after a few years, they too outlived their usefulness. I suppose I'd felt nostalgic about Jasper. He'd been my first soldier to make it past the newborn stage. So I'd wavered, trying to decide. Then thanks to Peter and Charlotte, he'd decided for me.

His voice had been soft, almost weary as he'd told me he was leaving. But sure, steady. And I'd never felt such fury in my life. And shock. In fact, I'd been so stunned by his words that he'd been gone before my scream of rage made it past my lips. I had started after him. Because as good as Jasper was at manipulating emotions, I was an even better tracker. And I had caught up to him. But he didn't know that. Something had stopped me at the last minute from ripping my unsuspecting faithless spawn limb from limb. I suppose it had been my strategic ruler's logic. I had known that he would be useful to me again. I just needed to give him time, let him get over his dull melancholy.

And so I had. But now I needed him whether he was over his little tantrum or not. When I'd found Peter and Charlotte, they'd denied any knowledge of Jasper's whereabouts. Typical. They'd been frightened of me. They had tried to put on a brave united front. But they were weak. Peter's biggest problem was that he'd always been willing to put his own safety on the line for Charlotte. Deluded into believing in the biggest lie of all—love.

I put them off-kilter by pretending I believed them, was leaving. But honestly, if they were going to lie, it probably would have been smart of them to dispose of the wedding invitation. The invitation with a map to a house outside of Gustavus, Alaska. Where Jasper was marrying someone named Alice Cullen and was going by the last name of Hale now for some odd reason. I hissed just at the thought of her name. I couldn't _wait_ to dispose of her. Slowly. Painfully. I mean, really, a wedding…a tulip-shaped invitation to that wedding…inviting Peter and Charlotte as if they were…were…family or something!

I inhaled sharply and caught the scent of fresh prey. Thank goodness for one thing about Canada—remote logging camps. Just a short detour and then on to Gustavus and reclaiming Jasper. He'd been mine first and one thing Alice Cullen would soon learn was that I didn't like to share. Ever. And then I gave myself over to tracking my next meal confident that I would be reunited with my greatest creation soon.


	22. Alliances

Sorry it took so long to update. Not that you asked, but just to tell you a little of how I write—I write all of my stories by longhand and then type them out. For some reason, I just think better when I have to write by hand. That's one of the reasons it takes me a little while to update, because I have to find time to do all that in between my real job and life, lol! Anyway, a special shout-out to ImageIdea who is new to fan fic but got my Edward/Bella references in previous chapters. Thanks Image! Also, AliceSteepedinSadness, I've sent you several messages, but I'm afraid you're not getting them and I'm not sure why! It's distressing me greatly! Please know I'm not ignoring you! For any of my readers including Alice, who want to get in touch with me personally, please feel free to e-mail me at . Now for your reading pleasure…Chapter 22

Disclaimer: I am writing this story because I am a fan of Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight Saga. I do not own any of the characters, plot lines or any Twilight-related materials.

Visions of Love

Chapter 22: Alliances

**Peter's POV**

This was the last thing on earth I wanted to be doing. Hell, in the universe. But the tiny vampire that was engaged to my old comrade could be very persuasive. I had a feeling she'd never learned the meaning of the word "no". Probably how she had wrangled Jasper into marriage. A mirthless smile stretched across my face at the thought that Jasper may have finally found his match in stubbornness.

We were darting through trees and had just crossed the Canadian border into Alaska. A glimpse of red caught my eye and I glanced to my right, seeing my mate Charlotte keeping pace with me. At my side, as she'd been for so many decades now. I felt a surge of pride at the thought of how graceful she ran, how strong she looked.

Jasper's Alice was slightly ahead of us. She was fast and I had the feeling that she was holding back somewhat so that we wouldn't lose sight of her. She seemed to know exactly where we were headed.

She claimed she could see the future but that her visions were subject to what people decided. This, she said, was how we would find Maria. Part of me hoped she was telling the truth. Just so we weren't doing this for nothing. But the bigger part of me hoped she wasn't. I couldn't lie; it had scared the bejeezus out of me when Maria had tracked Charlotte and me to Vancouver.

I was certain she was there to finish off what Jasper had thwarted all those years ago when he'd allowed Charlotte and me to escape. Maria did not like losing. Or having her will contradicted. And she made sure that those who attempted it knew it. By cruel and painful means if possible. I'd seen this firsthand countless times. Participated in her mayhem without a second thought on many of those occasions. Memories I'd tried on more than one occasion to banish. But they never stayed away for long.

She hadn't come for us. She'd come looking for Jasper, sure she'd find him with us. But she hadn't. And Charlotte and I had done our best to convince her that we didn't know where Jasper was. Which would have been true if we hadn't received a wedding invitation for Jasper and his bride-to-be only a few days before Maria showed up. But amazingly, it had seemed as if Maria believed us, leaving quietly. That should have roused my suspicion but I'd just been so damned relieved that no harm had come to Charlotte, that I'd let it go.

But I should have listened to that little nagging voice a little harder because if there was anything I'd learned over the years in Maria's army, it was that she was single-minded in getting what she wanted. Whatever it took. Oh yes, my maker could be quite twisted when trying to accomplish whatever she'd determined she wanted, whatever the cost. Which could change on the drop of a dime, something that used to drive both Jasper and me crazy as her generals. But she didn't like to admit defeat so she would change her course if it ever appeared the tide was turning against her.

But that wasn't the only thing that had driven Jasper crazy. I had seen what her bids for power, her tactics, her destruction had cost Jasper. I had been his second in command and had been at his side for many years. I'd known of his ability to manipulate emotions but I also knew that he felt others' emotions just as intensely as they did and more so since he felt them all when in a crowd. I'd seen the toll it was taking, especially by the time Charlotte and I left.

He'd taught me all that I knew. He hadn't been my maker, but he'd been my comrade-in-arms. And I would owe him for eternity. His ability to feel the bond between Charlotte and me, how strong it was, that had led him to letting us escape, leaving him to face Maria's wrath alone. But that had been Charlotte's and my salvation—living away from the wars, the constant destruction. Feeding was still a necessary evil but one that we were judicious about now and left us feeling less like the monsters we'd once been.

We hadn't been able to convince Jasper of that. But then again we didn't have to contend with the emotions he did. And of course living with the knowledge that your maker had grown tired of you, was contemplating your demise, had led Jasper into a deep depression. One I hadn't been sure I could pull him out of. But I'd had to try. I owed him that much. And Charlotte, of course, had agreed.

Sweet, gentle Charlotte. One would never have imagined that at one time, she'd been an amazingly scary newborn soldier. But I think that was because like Jasper, she had an inner strength, a will to live, and an innate goodness that came with them both from their human lives. However, I'd never been able to convince Jasper of this, nor had Charlotte. We'd worried about him incessantly as he'd continued to sink deeper into his depths of despair.

He'd stayed with us for a few years. I think more out of loyalty and gratitude than a true desire to be around us. But the fog of blackness only continued to grow with each passing feeding. He still felt a tremendous weight even if he wasn't feeding on as many humans as when he'd fought for Maria. And honestly, as much as I'd wanted to understand, I just couldn't. So eventually we'd parted ways in Philadelphia. Amicably of course. But apparently that had been when he'd run into this tiny whirlwind of a vampire. I actually couldn't wait to talk to Jasper and see just how exactly he'd ended up here. If we made it though this.

Lost in my thoughts and memories, I was suddenly jolted to see that Alice had stopped running. Charlotte and I met each other's gaze, both questioning. We slowed to a stop as well. Slowly, Alice turned around and faced us. Her heart-shaped face was taut with apprehension. There was a crease between her brows. I couldn't tell if it was because she was concentrating or because she was worried. Then her lips parted and a gasp came out of her. Her startled eyes flew to mine and Charlotte's.

"He's figured it out!" Her musical voice had a slight edge of panic to it. "Who's figured it out?" Charlotte's soothing voice was quiet. I could always count on her to stay calm in a crisis. Her cool-as-a-cucumber demeanor had served her well as a newborn soldier, helping her to even survive that first year. And it helped balance my fiery, strike-first, ask-questions-later temperament. I glanced sideways at my beautiful companion with her long auburn hair, a tribute to her Irish heritage. She was tall and slender, willowy, some would say. She was staring steadily at Alice, betraying no emotion on her angular face which framed her patrician nose. She looked regal, serene. My very own Celtic warrior princess, Boadicea brought to life for eternity.

"Jazz." My gaze snapped back to Alice as she responded. She stepped toward us. "And he's bringing the Cullens." She grasped one of each of our hands. Tight. Wow, she was _much_ stronger than you'd think judging her by her size.

"We have to get to Maria before them." Her eyes were pleading with us. Buttery golden pools, so unlike our own crimson ones, and entirely too hard to look away from. How were they so golden? Of course, not exactly the best moment to ask. Okay, but who the hell were the Cullens? That was Alice's last name on the wedding invitation. Family? Was she a part of a vampire family? I felt disbelief surge through my brain. It just didn't compute.

This was all starting to be a little much. Especially since I really needed all of my focus on Maria. Doing what had to be done to protect Charlotte, ensure a safe future for the both of us. And of course for Jasper too. But hell, I didn't know how I could do that with all the curveballs Jasper's strange little mate kept throwing at me.

"Alice, I think we need a batt—uh, game plan. Maria should not be underestimated." Alice's head slowly bobbed up and down, absorbing what I'd just said. I'd nearly said battle plan but had stopped myself at the last moment. She wasn't a soldier. I had to remind myself of that. But she was a part of this, as were Charlotte and I. And we were going to have to trust each other if were going to make it through this.

We were allies now. An uneasy alliance on my part to be sure. But an alliance none the less. If Charlotte and I hoped to truly live out our existence free of Maria, the idea of Maria, the memory of Maria, our maker, then we had no choice but to trust Alice and give her whatever we could to ensure our success.

And as I turned to look at my love, she returned my gaze, steady and reassuring, my determination grew. Failure was not an option. Whatever it took.

**Alice's POV**

I should be putting on my wedding dress at this very moment. Esme's eyes should be shining as if they were full of happy tears. Rose should be doing her final primping in the mirror, looking gorgeous of course. And knowing it. Emmett should be making lewd jokes about the honeymoon. Edward should be playing a lovely composition, written just for this occasion. Carlisle should be reviewing the writings on love he was planning to read during the ceremony.

And Jasper. Oh Jasper! He should be tugging at his bow tie, wallowing in his misery at being forced into his "monkey suit" as he called it, An exquisitely cut YSL tuxedo that Esme and I had picked up along with my dress in Paris on that shopping trip so long ago. Wait, it hadn't been _that_ long ago.

But it seemed a lifetime had passed since then. Even since my wedding vision had disappeared. And this nightmare had begun. I glanced over my shoulder to make sure that the tall dark-haired vampire and his auburn-haired mate were still with me. I'd had to play on their fear of Maria a little to get them to come with me but it honestly hadn't taken much. The outward scars marring their skin spoke of the inner scars that life with Maria had inflicted on them as much as my own Jasper. It also told me of the bond that the three of them shared that I would never truly understand. But it did comfort me a little to know that as much as Jasper thought he'd been, he wasn't really alone in this world.

Of course, the little amount of persuasion that I'd had to use had only added to my dread about Maria and her hold over her former soldiers. And that was exactly what I was trying to avoid when it came to Jasper. With my thoughts drifting to Jasper, a vision came to me. Jasper had found the book I'd left for him. As the vision overwhelmed me, I came to a sudden stop, my gasp of shock escaping my lungs before I could stop it. Without thinking, I whiled around, almost talking to myself, as I muttered, "He's figured it out!"

This is what I hadn't wanted to happen. I'd just wanted to reassure him that no matter what happened I would always love him, that he'd always be a part of me. The best part. I should have realized he'd try to find me. But I'd thought I'd have enough time. Dammit. Edward! As we'd edged further into the Tongass forest closing in on Maria, Edward had closed in on my thoughts. He'd once told me that if he was really connected to a person and concentrated, he could hear someone from about five to six miles out.

That meant they were close. And so was Maria. The encounter was unfolding before me and I felt some panic start to set in. What the hell was Jazz thinking bringing the entire Cullen clan with him? I could kill him. If Maria didn't do it first. At that thought, my gaze flew to Peter and Charlotte. Charlotte asked me who'd figured it out, her calm demeanor seemed to unnerve me further. How could she be so calm? Oh right, she couldn't see the mayhem that I'd seen in my vision.

"Jazz." I snapped. "And he's bringing the Cullens." I was still in disbelief and more than a little terrified for my new family. It'd seemed I caused exactly what I'd been trying to avoid. Badly done, Alice. Badly done. In my fear, I needed some type of comfort. I stepped forward and grabbed them. I was afraid if I didn't I would sink to the floor of the forest and never get up.

"We have to get to Maria before them." I looked at them knowing that I sounded needy, desperate. But I was. I'd do anything to protect my new family. And my love. I saw the shift in Peter's posture. I saw the fierce warrior mask that was so familiar to me from my own Jazz's face come over him. "Alice, I think we need a batt—uh, game plan. Maria should not be underestimated."

He sounded commanding. Like what I'd imagine a general or some other officer might sound. I slowly nodded in response. He was right. We did need a battle plan. He'd stopped himself short of saying that. But if we were going to stop Maria, we needed to look at it like a battle. And as Peter began telling me his strategy and I saw the ferocity glow in Charlotte's eyes as her mate spoke, I'd never been so grateful to have them as allies. Because I sure as heck wouldn't have wanted them for enemies. I just hoped our little alliance would be enough. And that it wouldn't break in the face of what we all feared most. Maria.


	23. Eternal

Sorry I didn't get this finished sooner but probably like most of you, I was basking in the Twilight glow last night and re-watching the New Moon trailer about a million times! This is a little different format than the most recent chapters but I hope a welcome one. I was just feeling like a little alone time with Jasper! This chapter is for all of you who have been with me since the beginning. Your constant reviews keep me going! And to all of my new readers, I thank you as well! PLEASE read and review! I love to know what you're thinking. And if you like, please recommend to your friends! So I noticed they didn't publish my address so let's do it the old-fashioned way. Want to give me a private shout-out, hit me up at jennrich2830atgmaildotcom.

Disclaimer: I am writing this story because I am a fan of Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight Saga. I do not own any of the characters, plot lines or any Twilight-related materials. A VERY special shout-out to Elizabeth Barrett Browning who captured the essence of love with the written word much better than I ever could and therefore I must not claim any rights to her sonnet featured in this chapter.

Visions of Love

Chapter 23: Eternal

**Jasper's POV**

I was cold. Not because of the wind whipping by me as I ran faster than I think I'd ever run before. I was cold inside. My heart which had physically been frozen for almost a century was now matched by the emotional coldness that had come over me ever since I realized that Alice had run off. And it was all my fault.

At first I hadn't believed it. I was sure she was somewhere near by. But I hadn't been able to find her. Rosalie and the others hadn't seen her in hours. And then I found the book she'd left in our room. On our bed. Shortly after that, as I'd tried to make sense of why she'd left the book marked with Peter and Charlotte's names and an address in Vancouver, Edward heard her.

She wasn't far. But she was in danger. And completely stubborn and clueless about how much trouble she was truly in. Even if Peter and Charlotte were with her which Edward had assured me they were.

I was terrified. I was angry. But most of all I was numb. Why hadn't she trusted in me enough to wait for me to get back? But I knew the answer. Because she couldn't. Because I had left her before and she couldn't trust that I wouldn't run off again. With Maria. A bitter laugh forced its way out of my lungs. Oh, if only she knew that I would never abandon her again. And certainly not for that bitch Maria.

Of course, I couldn't completely hate Maria. If it hadn't been for her, I'd never be what I am, would never have met my soulmate, my pixie, would not be able to spend eternity with aforementioned soulmate. Never thought I'd ever have _any_ level of comfort with the monster that Maria had made me but with Alice, it was somehow easier. I certainly knew that I wanted to be with her for eternity. So I had to make sure that Edward, I and the rest of the Cullens got to the site Edward had seen in Alice's visions. A clearing in the Tongass forest less than five miles from our home.

The proximity is what had allowed Alice to warn Edward. She'd been warning him to stay away, so he could reassure me that she was coming back. She wasn't happy about the vision she'd had of the Cullens and I chasing her down. What she hadn't accounted for was the absolute terror I'd felt at the thought of her confronting Maria. Maria was a seasoned fighter and if she wanted Alice dead she would stop at nothing to accomplish that goal. So I had to get there first. And stop Maria. And then Alice was never leaving my sight again. Eternally within my reach whether she liked it or not.

I reached up and touched the slim book that I'd slipped in the side pocket of the jacket I wore. It had become my talisman since finding it on the bed. I patted the hardback volume, reassuring myself of Alice's love. And urging me to go faster. As I picked up the pace concentrating on Edward's back in front of me, I thought about when I'd first found the slim brown leather-bound book in the middle of the pillows on our feather mattress. I'd just realized that Alice was gone and had felt my knees give out on me. If I hadn't been a vampire, I'm sure I would have fainted. That was hard to admit for an old Texas soldier. But true.

I was on my knees in the middle of our bed and fell forward on my hands. And there it was. Resting against a turquoise silk pillow. The gold-leaf title, fading in places but you could still read the title. _Eternal Love_, a collection of poetry that Alice had snagged from Carlisle's library. The pages were yellow and brittle. Obviously a book full of love poems. Definitely _not_ a book any self-respecting Texas cowboy soldier would be caught undead with.

Despite my fears, a smile touched my lips at the memory of how the book had come into our lives. A few weeks before, Alice had known that all the wedding goings-on were starting to get me. Despite my best efforts, the tension kept rolling off me in waves everywhere I went in the house. I think she was scared I was on the edge of leaving again. But I wasn't. I was just anxious to bind her to me for eternity. So in her own infinite pixie wisdom, she had decided we needed to "get away" like humans do.

I'd chuckled as I saw the spread before us after she'd convinced me to follow her to the creek bank behind the house. She'd found a grassy area and covered it with a huge red plaid blanket. There was a gigantic wicker picnic hamper in one corner with an ice bucket holding a bottle of champagne next to it.

She'd slipped her hand in mine and squeezed. I looked down at her and she grinned impishly at me. My favorite grin. I'd smiled lopsidedly back at her. "You like it?" she whispered. She always did that when she was unsure of herself. I couldn't help myself. I leaned down and kissed the tip of her nose. Her golden eyes melted into pools of warm toffee.

"I like _you_." I whispered back. "What is all this?" My free hand gestured at the scene before us. "It's our romantic picnic. Our get-away from all the craziness. Just like humans." Her tone implied I should have found this obvious. Despite the fact that a vampire's ideal picnic would probably have involved a liquid a little less bubbly than champagne. Okay, would this woman ever cease to surprise me?

As she kept her gaze on mine, she tugged me toward the blanket and I decided she would not. And I realized that regimented soldier that I was, I couldn't give a damn. Hell's bells, I couldn't wait for the next surprise. I was hoping it would have something to do with her reneging on the whole chastity vow scenario she'd forced us into before the wedding.

She sat next to the basket, her legs gracefully tucked to the side. She patted the space beside her and quietly kneeled next to her, fully caught in the web she was weaving. Her face was glowing with happiness. I knew my pixie. She was fairly bursting with all the excitement. I wasn't sure if it was excitement at being alone with me or if it had to do with her accomplishing another "human" feat.

She flipped the wooden top of the hamper open and I glanced inside seeing wax paper-wrapped sandwiches, tubs of potato salad and cartons of fresh strawberries. Surely she didn't mean for us to…eat this? I looked at her my eyebrow raised in question. I felt my lips purse in disapproval. Honestly, sometimes she just took the charade one stop too far…no way I was sticking strawberries in my mouth. I'd rather feed on a herd of deer. Literally.

She tilted her head to one side, a sly grin on her face. She was humming some nonsensical tune. I vaguely recognized it as some tune Esme was always begging Edward to bang out on the baby grand. She slowly slipped her hand in the basket and began rummaging around. She was up to something. And now thanks to all her mysterious teasing so was I.

Abstinence be damned. I leaned forward to capture her lips with mine. Just one taste. I felt like it'd been forever since she'd been in my arms. Before I could reach her, she leaned back and laughed. "Uh, uh, uh, soldier. Not so fast." Playfully growling, I lunged forward and tackled her backward on the blanket, pinning her beneath me.

She smiled indulgently up at me, reaching up and running her hand through my hair. "Trust me, cowboy. This hurts me as much as it hurts you." My brows shot up as I looked down at her, shifting the lower part my body against her. "I seriously doubt _that_ pixie," my tone dry. She threw her head back and laughed and then brought her hands up and framed my face. Her eyes grew warm. "_Soon._" Her tone fervent. "I promise."

She wriggled beneath me trying to get up. I growled again. She wasn't helping matters but I was first and foremost a gentleman so I sat up, tugging her up with me to a sitting position. "Thank you," she said primly. So we were back to the human charade. I sighed heavily.

Alice had finally found what she was looking for in the basket. Slowly she pulled out a slim brown leather-bound book. She waggled it in front of my face. "See?" What was she up to? I captured her wrist and looked at the book cover quickly scanning the title. My quizzical gaze met her. She grinned back at me shyly.

"When humans go on romantic picnics, they lay on blankets and read love poems to each other," she quietly explained. Her tone patient as if explaining to a small child. Or a clueless vampire. She was so earnest, I had to fight to bite back the laugh that threatened to escape me. "Darlin', I went to plenty of picnics in my human days and I don't ever remember anybody reading love poems."

She looked at me her brows knitted in confusion. "Well, you're just not remembering it right. You just probably never went on any _romantic_ picnics." Her tiny voice was a weird mixture of self-assurance and self-doubt. Then I regretted opening my big fat mouth. I felt like a jerk for ruining her romantic fantasy. A fantasy that I had figured prominently in. I was a damn jackelope fool!

I reached up and slipped the book from her grip. Leaning forward, I placed a lingering kiss right on the crease between her brows. I pulled back slightly and brought my hand up, tracing the outline of her bow-shaped lips. Her mouth parted slightly and her breathing sped up. I half-smiled at her and said, "You're absolutely right pixie. You're my first. So I guess our romantic picnic can be whatever you want."

I leaned forward then and lightly captured her lips, molding and shaping them to mine. Never breaking the kiss, I stretched out onto the blanket on my back, bringing her with me. I didn't want to break the kiss, but I wanted to give her what she wanted. And if that meant some silly love poem, then hey, I'm sure I'd faced worse things in my time. If I thought about, I'm sure I could come up with something. Surely. But with her lips teasing against mine, I couldn't think of anything specifically at the moment.

Reluctantly, I broke our kiss and tucked her against my left side. She murmured a protest and reached up searching for my lips. I pulled back my head and grinned at her. "Uh, uh, uh, pixie. Not so fast. I'm in the mood for some romance. Plus, I'd hate to make you break your vow…" She slapped my chest and her tinkling laugh washed over me, warming the dead heart inside that chest.

I had one arm wrapped around her and the book in my other hand. She rested her head in the nook between my shoulder and chest, a place I was sure had been created just for her. I flipped the book open and began reading the first page it fell on. I figured one was much like another. I couldn't say that poetry had ever figured prominently in my life before.

But then I began reading the words on the page and I realized that I meant them. I _meant_ these words. This was how I felt about Alice. And I wanted her to know it then. As my emotions overtook me, my baritone voice grew gruff and my Texas drawl more pronounced. Damn, I hated when I sounded like a wounded walrus but I couldn't control the emotion as the words poured out of my mouth.

Indeed this very love which is my boast,  
And which, when rising up from breast to brow,  
Doth crown me with a ruby large enow  
To draw men's eyes and prove the inner cost,—  
This love even, all my worth, to the uttermost,  
I should not love withal, unless that thou  
Hadst set me an example, shown me how,  
When first thine earnest eyes with mine were crossed,  
And love called love. And thus, I cannot speak  
Of love even, as a good thing of my own:  
Thy soul hath snatched up mine all faint and weak,  
And placed it by thee on a golden throne,—  
And that I love (O soul, we must be meek!)  
Is by thee only, whom I love alone.

I could feel her gaze on me, her head shifting slightly against my shoulder as she looked up. The last word died on my lips and I looked down at her. I let the love roll off of me in waves just wanting to let my soon to be bride feel exactly what I was feeling at that very moment. I felt drunk on the powerful emotions crashing through me. I didn't deserve to feel this way, didn't deserve to be with her, but I was tired of fighting against it. Beyond all reason, this woman had chosen me. And she'd saved me, given me a life I'd never dared hoped for.

"Jazz." Edward's velvety voice cut through my reverie. Although he'd never let on, I felt a little embarrassed as I realized he'd probably relived the whole romantic picnic episode. I inwardly groaned as I thought about him knowing I'd kicked back and read poetry to Alice. Out loud. Love poems. I cut my eyes to the side and saw his lips pressed tightly together as if trying to suppress laughter. Great. Yep, I'm sure he'd whip his newfound knowledge out at some future awkward date. He slowly shook his head back and forth and then shot me a look far too innocent to be believed.

Just as I was about to pop him a good one, I heard Rosalie hiss. "Someone's coming," she growled. We were still hidden among the trees at the clearing's edge. Immediately we all dropped to a defensive crouch and my eyes scanned the landscape. I _really_ hoped we'd beat Alice to the clearing.

And then I saw her. And if my heart hadn't already stopped beating, it would have then. I had to clench my muscles to keep from springing across the clearing to get to her. It felt as if an eternity had passed since I'd last seen her. And I wished it had.

A blur caught my eye and I tore my gaze away just in time to see _her_. Hell's bells. Alice. If we made it through this alive, I swore, I was going to kill her. Or kiss her. Probably just kiss her until she killed me.

"If you want to stay alive, follow my lead." I quietly spoke to my family. They all nodded in silent agreement. Even Emmett. And then we sprung into the clearing until I was face to face with my eternal tormentor. Her face a mask of haughty confidence, her crimson eyes full of spite and triumph. And although I didn't have a mirror, I was sure that my face was frozen in the vicious mask of the warrior she'd turned me into all those years ago. Time for her to learn what love and loyalty were all about. And it wouldn't be pretty.

A shiver ran down my spine as she smiled ferally and coldly cooed, "Jasper. I knew you'd come." That was the last shiver I'd ever feel at her expense. I glanced to my right and saw Alice flanked by Peter and Charlotte. Peter had a restraining arm around her waist. I felt relief, knowing that my former comrades would keep Alice safe and out of the way. And then my resolve steeled, I straightened my spine and bared my teeth. Maria had no idea. Now I had something to live for. Something I didn't want to lose. Eternal love.


	24. Loyalty

Well, here's this chapter that you all have been waiting for. I don't want to give too much away but I'm sure there will be some questions when you're done so I'll address those at the beginning of the next chapter. I have to say this was really, really hard to write! I totally had writer's block for about a week. Anyway, I hope you enjoy and as always please review! It's my own personal brand of heroin. I'm starting to get really sad that we're so close to the end now!

Disclaimer: I am writing this story because I am a fan of Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight Saga. I do not own any of the characters, plot lines or any Twilight-related materials.

Visions of Love

Chapter 24: Loyalty

**Maria's POV**

I'd known he would come. If nothing else, he was loyal. Except for this little "break" he'd taken thanks to Peter and Charlotte's interference. But I'd never doubted his loyalty and devotion to me. Ours was a bond not easily broken. Something I couldn't wait to teach the ridiculous female who thought she could stake a claim on my greatest creation. I smiled confidently when I saw him standing before me.

"Jasper. I knew you'd come." Although I kept my eyes on him, I took stock of the other vampires who had crouched behind him in defensive stances. Two females, three males. So Jasper had gone off and joined himself a coven. Interesting. If I didn't see this with my own eyes, I'd hardly believe it. Jasper had never been much of a joiner, preferring to wallow in his own misery alone.

So the female vamp must have some sort of hold on him. I felt the first stirrings of uncertainty. Perhaps their bond was stronger than I anticipated. A flash of movement in my peripheral vision caught my eye and as I glanced to my left, I saw her. Alice. Peter and Charlotte had accompanied her. Imbeciles.

I felt a surge of power at the sight, all uncertainty gone. She made this too easy, following me here. Once I destroyed her, Jasper would see that there was no other choice than to follow me. Seeing where my gaze landed, Jasper suddenly bared his teeth and a low growl rumbled in his chest. My smile widened. There was my soldier.

"Now Jasper, there's no need to be nasty." I attempted to sound soothing. It wasn't my strong suit. His eyes were glowing with anger. They were the color of ocher. What had she done to him? I longed for the crimson eyes of my most fearsome monster in battle.

"Why are you here, Maria?" The vampires behind him had not moved. Five marble statues with matching eyes. Eyes that were watching my every movement. Intently. My uncertainty returned. "Why I'm here for you of course." The embers in his eyes grew brighter and I saw a muscle in his jaw twitch. At my words, the tiny female cried out and I glanced to see her struggling to break free from Peter and Charlotte who had grabbed her. I wish they'd let her go so she would come to me. It would make my destruction of her so much easier.

"I did not anticipate such an audience, however. What have you been doing with yourself, Major Whitlock?" I kept my tone light, not wanting to give anything away. "That's no longer any of your damn business. Hasn't been for quite some time now. If it ever should have been in the first place." His deep baritone was gruff, as cold as the ice that surrounded us.

I forced a chuckle from my stiff lips. He was definitely not going to make this easy. And I had so hoped to avoid violence. "No matter. I already know. Busy planning a wedding, no?" His full lips drew back over his razor-sharp teeth and a hiss escaped from his mouth. I clucked my tongue. "Tsk, tsk. Is that any way to treat an old _friend_? I suppose my invitation was lost in the mail. Unlike Peter and Charlotte's."

His gaze darted to Peter and Charlotte, confusion in his eyes. His eyes landed on the female vamp. "Sorry." Her whisper was still audible and she looked forlorn as she stared back at Jasper. I felt a hot jab of jealousy as they shared this moment. He gave a slight nod and her eyes lit up. I wanted to rip those eyes out of her head so she would never be able to share such a moment with _my_ general ever again.

I feigned a look of hurt. "Shouldn't you be thanking me? After all, if it weren't for me, you wouldn't exist to participate in a wedding." His gaze swiveled back to mine, every muscle in his body rigid with suppressed rage. Good, I'd broken through his cold mask. I still hadn't decided how to deal with the others yet. Who to go for first, how to separate Alice from the others so that I could get rid of her first. I was sure once I got started Peter and Charlotte would run off like the cowards they'd always been. But those other vamps…I was still outnumbered. And I believed in calculated risks. It's how I had survived for so long surrounded by so much violence.

Before I could decide on my strategy, Jasper's angry voice cut through. "Thank you? You're lucky I haven't ripped you apart yet. You turned me into a monster." His voice was guttural as he spit out the words. The anger was rolling off of him in waves, so strong I would have sworn you could physically see it. His anger ignited my own.

"Monster? I gave you eternal life. I gave you power beyond any you could have imagined. And you abandoned it all. You abandoned _me_! After all I had given you. My most loyal and trusted soldier, gone. Vanished." My words came out in a torrent, sounding almost like a hissing cat.

So he thought I'd made him a monster. Well, perhaps. But a damn fine monster he'd been. And I needed his organization, his discipline, his ferocity if I hoped to reclaim some of my lost territory as well as the expansion throughout Mexico and Central America I envisioned. Now to convince him. It would be so much easier if he hadn't insisted on an audience! But I was uneasy in the presence of so many unknown vampires. Vampires with strange eyes.

I wasn't surprised that they so easily seemed to be following Jasper's unspoken commands by merely following his movements. Jasper had always drawn others to them, led them, many times without trying. It was just who he was and what made him such a valuable asset. Normally I also knew he would have been sending out calming vibes in such a volatile situation but I suppose because of his own misplaced loyalty to the dark-haired female his own tension was what was influencing the air around us as it fairly crackled with his anger. And fear. I knew he feared me. The other vampires would be wise to do so.

I knew my only chance was to get him to talk to me alone. I was ambitious but not stupid. At my thought, the bronze-haired male behind Jasper growled and then hissed. Had I said the words aloud? He was quite handsome and the look of fury on his face was breath-taking. Perhaps he could join Jasper.

His growl was louder this time. Interesting. It was as if he were reading my thoughts. But surely that wasn't so…well, if it was so, that would make him an even more valuable soldier. Perhaps one day, after Jasper had taught him all he knew, he could step into Jasper's role. And Jasper, well…all good things must come to an end eventually.

The bronze-haired vampire was now trembling in his barely controlled fury. He _could_ hear me! Fascinating. I couldn't help myself from thinking of all I could do with him and his power. At that moment, Jasper's tiny female cried out "No!" at the same time that the bronze-haired boy spat out "Never!"

Confusion and curiosity filled me and I couldn't stop from turning to look in the direction of the female. She was being restrained by both Peter and Charlotte and was struggling to break free. She was looking at me with a mixture of horror and anger. Could she read minds as well? Well, now this _did_ change things. Imagine three soldiers with such gifts and if she was with me, then so Jasper would be.

I slowly turned my head and smiled at Jasper. "Well, Jasper, you have made such interesting friends since leaving. If you and your female join me, along with him," I jutted my chin in the direction of the bronze-haired male. "We will take Mexico in no time at all. And then the three of you will have untold power. The likes of which have never been seen in the vampire world."

All of the vampires surrounding Jasper had various looks of shock and disgust on their faces at my words. But it barely registered as suddenly Jasper's face was mere inches from my own, a mask of rage. He'd gripped my upper arms and I was locked in place. Well, this was an unexpected turn of events. And not a good one. The other vampires closed ranks around Jasper and suddenly I was surrounded.

**Jasper's POV**

All I could see was red. I was back in the days when I could execute a massacre of epic proportions in a matter of minutes. Maria was smart. Somehow she'd figured out that Edward and Alice were "special". That was something I'd hoped to avoid. I knew how she could exploit those gifts for her own gain. Use them up until they would be empty and twisted inside. Like I had been. Until Alice found me. Saved me from the pitiful existence I'd been condemned to. No way in hell I was going to let that happen to her or Edward. I'd die first. But by God, I was taking Maria to hell with me.

I wished the Cullens hadn't closed ranks around me. I'd lunged for Maria without thinking, completely engulfed in my rage. I was trying to decide what to rip off first. Her legs and then she couldn't run. My hibernating monster began to emerge and I was suddenly back in survival mode, strategizing how best to protect my new family.

"Jasper!" Alice's anguished panicked voice cut through my crimson haze. I snapped my gaze to her. She'd been struggling against Peter and Charlotte's grasp as soon as they'd reached the clearing but now she was limp, sagging in their grasp. I was sure she would be a puddle on the ground if they were not now holding her up. She was looking in my direction, her eyes slightly unfocused. She was seeing something. She was shaking her head from side to side slowly. Then she suddenly gave her head a hard shake. And looked at me. Her eyes were a mixture of horror and revulsion. What the hell had she seen? "Don't do it." She spoke softly but I knew everyone else had heard her as clearly as I did. "It's not necessary. She's not worth it." I glanced back at Maria as I felt her stiffen in my grasp. Her eyes flashed anger at Alice's words. But I saw something behind the anger. She was afraid. Maria was afraid.

I had never seen Maria afraid before. Calculating, cold, yes, angry. Often. But Maria was also about self-preservation. She'd never have lasted so long if she weren't. And I thought that she was probably beginning to sense the real danger she was in of not leaving this clearing alive. Without taking my eyes off of Maria, I asked Edward a question with my mind.

Edward pulled up out of his defensive crouch and came up and put a hand on my right shoulder. "Alice is right. She's not worth it. We'd never dream of joining her. And neither would you. She's scared. She underestimated your bond with us. With Alice. She doesn't understand what we are. She's misinterpreted Alice's gift. She doesn't fully understand mine. She made unfortunate assumptions in her misguided plan for domination. And now she's sure she will pay for those misinterpretations with her life."

Edward had moved beside me and was looking at me. I turned and saw his mouth twisted in a crooked smile, as if amused by Maria's musings. He shrugged with one shoulder. "This is going to sound crazy, but she really just wants to get the hell out of here in one piece and she's sworn to herself never to come near you or us ever again. Now she thinks _we're_ the freaks and not worth it." I felt one corner of my mouth go up in a returned half-smile. "Is that so?"

I turned back and looked at Maria, my gaze boring into hers. "If I let you go, you swear never to come near me or my family ever again?" She silently nodded, the fear back in her eyes as her gaze darted between me and Edward. "Not good enough Maria. Say it out loud. I. Swear. Never. To. Come. Near. You." I spoke as if to a child.

"I swear never to come near you." Her words came out in a choked whisper. "Or Peter and Charlotte." I tacked that one on knowing that when she left here there would be a rampage and I did not want my old friends to be caught in her impotent rage at having her plans squashed and made to feel threatened. At that her eyes flashed angrily. She knew I'd caught her. "Or Peter and Charlotte." These words were spat at me, her chin jutting forward defiantly.

_Is she lying?_ I asked Edward. No way was I letting her go until I knew if she meant what she said. "Yes, she means it. You can let her go." At his words, I relaxed my grip but not letting go yet. "I don't want to ever see you again. Do you understand? I will _never_ be a monster for you ever again. Now go." I let go of her with a slight shake and she stumbled a bit backwards with the force. I saw the flash of anger but also relief and with that she was gone.

My head was pounding as if blood were rushing back into my brain. But I had no blood and I realized that I was being hit with not only my own relief at the avoidance of violence and that everyone was still in one piece but I was also being hit with the relief of eight other vampires and it was giving me a head rush. Whoa. But I only had one thought. I could hear the chatter all around me as my family surrounded me. I felt Emmett clap me on the back, nearly knocking me flat on my face but I turned where Peter and Charlotte had held Alice, worry clouding my mind. She wasn't there. Peter and Charlotte were holding hands, standing looking at our family who was celebrating with hugs and chatter. I scanned for Alice but in the next second I was lying on my back after a massive collision with a brick wall. Okay, not a brick wall. One very relieved, ecstatic pixie who was raining kisses all over my face and neck. I couldn't stop chuckling.

"I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you." Each kiss was punctuated with an "I love you." I wrapped my arms around her waist squeezing as tight as I could, never wanting to let go. That had been way too close. I sat us up, not letting go and capturing her lips with my own, pouring all of my love and loyalty in our kiss. Sure, I was still upset that she had thought to face down Maria but now that we were free of Maria and everyone was okay, well, I could wait to lecture her.

I noticed that it had grown silent and there was a clearing throat. Carlisle. "Good grief, get a room you two!" Emmett. Ever subtle. I sighed and broke our kiss as we both looked sheepishly at our amused family. I stood up and pulled Alice up with me. But I didn't let go of her hand. Esme and Carlisle were beaming with pride at us. Edward looked bemused. But he always looked bemused when one of the couples showed affection to each other. Rosalie looked annoyed which I took to mean that she was unhappy with the lack of attention she was getting. Emmett was grinning like a loon.

"I just want to thank you all for standing behind me on this situation. I know it could have ended very badly." I squeezed Alice's hand. I glanced to Peter and Charlotte who still hadn't moved and were looking at our crazy family with a mixture of fascination and horror. "And thanks to you all for looking out for Alice. I know you put yourself at great risk and I do appreciate it. You've always been loyal friends." Peter dipped his head for a long moment in acknowledgment and Charlotte gave me a small smile. Then they raised their hands in farewell and like that had vanished.

"Now don't we have a wedding to get to?" I looked down at Alice with a half-smile. "Yes we do, cowboy!" Her eyes twinkling and I could see the love reflected back that was filling me fuller than I ever dreamed it possible for a vampire to feel. Then she squeezed my hand. Hard. Ouch. And nothing had ever hurt so good.


	25. Vows

Oh my Dear Readers! So this is it. The final chapter. I'm sorry it took so long to update but as you'll see this is the LONGEST chapter I've written to date! So it did take a while. So while this is the final chapter, there will be one short epilogue to wrap up some loose ends. But then it is on to the next project. I have two stewing in my brain right now so we'll see which one wins out in getting written first. I hope to announce to you which one it is in the epilogue so you can be on the lookout for it, if you so desire! This has been a fantastic voyage and I'm very sad to see it come to a close. I hope I have done Alice and Jasper's story some sense of justice. I tried to stay true to the characters and canon of the Twilight Saga and I think I did. But tell me Dear Readers, do YOU think I did? This author like all authors is very needy and unsure of her work so reviews are the BEST tonic. I thank all of my very faithful readers and reviewers whose encouragement has helped me see this through to the end. I'll have some special awards before the epilogue for some of you! Please, the moment you all have been waiting 24 chapters for…the wedding!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Chapter 25: Vows

**Alice's POV**

It was back. My wedding vision had returned the moment Maria had decided to run. With Jasper's gentle persuasion of course. I hadn't been sure we'd be able to avoid venomshed and it had terrified me to see my own worst nightmare come true…Jazz squared off against Maria, face-to-face. The very thing I'd been trying to avoid.

But I'd been so proud of Jasper—how he'd handled his maker—all without violence. I knew it'd taken all of his willpower to hold back, especially once Maria figured out that Edward and I were different. I'd seen the visions of her bloody vicious plans.

The indifferent coldness with which she'd planned to dispose of Jasper. I'd been hot with a strange mixture of revulsion and the blackest anger I'd ever felt toward another creature. I'd seen Jasper's bloody past but it was a picnic in the park compared to her planned domination.

But none of that mattered now. My warrior vampire had leashed the monster. It was an important step for our new lives—our new quest to truly become Cullens. I knew Carlisle was proud of the way Jasper had handled things—not as thrilled with me trying to fix things on my own. And neither was Jasper for that matter. Or Edward. Sheesh, their overprotectiveness was just a little much. I'd tried to reassure them that I had things perfectly under control but it hadn't stopped either of them from lecturing me a time or two or twenty since we'd returned.

But I was proud of Jazz too. Because I had seen it. His impulse to destroy her. It'd been close. That's why I'd had to cry out, get his attention. If he'd chosen to join her or if he'd decided to destroy her…well, then I had the feeling the wedding vision would have been gone forever.

But he hadn't chosen either of those. He'd chosen _me._ He'd chosen a life with _me_. Forever. It was enough to make my breath stop, if I'd been breathing. I looked in the mirror. I didn't recognize the face staring back even though it was supposedly my own. Rose had done an amazing job with my make-up. I put my hand against the ivory satin covering my belly, trying to calm the herd of deer that had taken up residence there and were stampeding all around my inside.

There was still a part of me that didn't really believe this was happening considering what had transpired just the week before. Had it really only been a week since the confrontation with Maria? It felt like it had been a lifetime that I'd been waiting for the wedding to actually happen. And I guess in a way it had. Two lifetimes. One I didn't remember. The other I didn't want to remember until that rainy day in Philadelphia when Jazz had swaggered into my life. And then of course when the Cullens had come into both of our lives.

It was more than I'd dared hoped or dreamed it would be. And now my day was finally here. Or _our_ day. Even if Jazz didn't think he wanted to do it. He'd thank me later. Hopefully in some delightfully wicked ways.

I turned away from the full-length mirror and walked toward the window wall in our tower room that overlooked the backyard. It looked like a fairy wonderland. Esme and I had transformed it with yards and yards of draped white fabric and thousands of white flowers of all kinds—daisies, tulips, roses, and on and on. I think we'd cleaned out every flower shop in Alaska and maybe a few in Canada. Every arch, every bouquet was wrapped in twinkling white lights.

There were no chairs. It really wasn't necessary. The Cullens were the only guests. Rose was my matron of honor. Emmett was standing with Jasper. Edward was in charge of music. Esme had a circular stage painted in white built and Edward's grand piano had been moved to that stage. It stood beside the massive white gazebo again draped in gauzy white fabric and covered in flowers and lights. That's where the ceremony was to be.

God, I hoped Jazz was ready. Oh, I knew he wasn't going to run off. But I'd decided that I wanted us to each write our own vows. Mine were easy. They'd been written on my unbeating heart the moment I'd seen him in my first vision of us. But when I'd told him of my plan for us to recite our own vows rather than the old till-death-do-us-part routine—which frankly I felt didn't really apply in our situation—I'd seen the panic settle deep in his ochre eyes.

We'd been in the tower room, reaffirming our joy in having avoided disaster with Maria and just being together. It'd been electric and now we were wallowing in the glow on our mattress, looking up at the stars. We'd decided to postpone the wedding to the following Saturday to give everyone a chance to get their bearing after our close call. That was when I'd decided I didn't want those stuffy old vows. I wanted to never miss the chance to _really_ tell Jazz how I felt, to bind myself to him in our own way—forever.

"Jazz, do you love me?" I put my plan into action. My fingers were drawing patterns across his sculpted chest. I purposely kept my voice light. He had an arm wrapped around my shoulders and I felt his grip tighten on my upper arm. He tilted his head to look down at me, a look of surprise on his face. I looked up at him, trying to keep my eyes wide, my look innocent. "Pixie, you don't even have to ask. You know I do." The web was spun. He leaned down and placed a lingering kiss on my forehead. I had to close my eyes briefly as the electricity flowed through me. Even the most innocent of his touches sent shockwaves through me. I quickly regrouped, opened my eyes wide and caught my bottom lip between my teeth, seemingly uncertain.

"What's all this, pixie?" I could see his concern as his brow puckered and he brought his thumb up and gently pulled my lip from my teeth. I looked down and then looked back up peeking at him through my lashes. I was in full pixie mode for sure now. But I was determined to get what I wanted.

I gave a small tentative smile. "Well, I've been thinking…" I could see the "uh-oh" in his eyes, the small tic in his jaw as he tried to suppress a smile, not quite succeeding. At least, he knew when he was in trouble. And seemed resigned to it. A small sigh escaped his lips and his eyes rolled toward the glass ceiling where the moon shone down on us from. I had to bite my tongue to keep from giggling at his put-upon expression.

"Go on." His deep baritone held a glint of amusement. I kept drawing patterns on his chest and kept my gaze concentrated there. Once I actually told him what I wanted, I wasn't quite sure I actually wanted to see the look on his face. I could just imagine…

He brought his free hand up and captured my drawing hand, stilling my motions with a light squeeze. He then brought my hand up to his lips and placed a hot, fervent kiss in the palm. I gasped and looked up then as my toes curled. Oh, this was never going to get old, not for a million, billion, zillion years.

I took a deep breath and then just let it all spill out in one trilling quick succession. "Well, I've been thinking that I'd really love it if we did something a little different during the ceremony instead of all those stuffy old better or worse, sickness and health, richer or poorer vows because I mean they don't really apply to us especially that whole till death do us part part, well dontchathink?" I stopped, not because I needed a breath but because I'd looked up and seen the crease between his brows. I could tell he was trying to work out what I was getting to.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'd really, _really_ love it if we wrote our own vows. For the wedding. For each other." The crease grew as he frowned slightly, realizing what I was asking. I knew I was asking a lot of a soldier cowboy warrior vampire. But I knew he had it in him. Even if he didn't. Yet. I could already see each argument, he was about to put up. One of the advantages of having visions of the future. And I was prepared.

He opened his mouth, ready to argue. I brought up a hand and covered his mouth with my fingers. "Shh. Wait. Hear me out, cowboy. I know you don't think you can do it. You think you're not good with words. What was it you said to me in Philadelphia? You're more comfortable with actions. But you can do this. You don't have to write pages and pages. Just say what's in your heart. That's all I ask. It's all I'll ever ask of you. So if you love me, you'll do this just one teensy-weensy little thing I ask. You said it was _my_ day after all and I could have whatever I want."

I grinned impishly at him and his shoulders sagged in defeat. My soldier was smart. He knew when he was surrounded. Then he'd looked down at me and nodded his head in assent. "Okay," he'd whispered. And then I'd reached up to mold my lips to his and reminded him of why he loved me enough to make me happy.

I was shaken out of my memory at the light knock on the door. I turned just as Rosalie peeked her head in. "Oh good, you're decent." She opened the door wider and glided in. She wore a gunmetal silk gray YSL dress that draped her perfect figure in all the right places. The halter top had a plunging neckline with folds of the soft fabric cascading like waterfalls. She looked breathtaking and I was happy that Esme and I had made the right choice on our short outing to Paris when we'd snagged the billowing strapless masterpiece that was my wedding dress.

"Wow, Rose, you look stunning." She smiled knowingly and I saw the fierce pride in her eyes. She'd left her hair down but had a white orchid tucked behind one ear and slightly shook her blonde waves. "Thanks. But look at you…that dress, amazing. You look gorgeous." And I could tell she meant it because she had that grudging tone in her voice. I beamed at her and tripped quickly to close the distance and pull her into a quick hard hug. She stiffened in surprise at first. Affection was not Rose's gift. But then she relaxed and I felt her bare arms come around and give me a light pat on the back before quickly stepping back.

"Well, look at my two beautiful daughters. Okay, if I come in?" Carlisle was standing in the doorway. Rose and I turned to face him and I beamed at the sight. He looked incredibly dashing in his gunmetal gray tux with the gray-striped full tie tacked with a gleaming emerald tie-tack. It matched my engagement ring and the emerald necklace that was nestled against Rosalie's chest.

Carlisle was one of those people who truly seemed to have an ethereal light about him all the time. I think it was his goodness that just shone out of him due to nothing that he did. It was simply him. He was what was best about this world. Vampire or not.

"Of course!" My voice squeaked and then I skipped to him and threw my arms around his waist as he walked into the room. I heard the strains of Vivaldi as Edward began to play the piano. I knew that meant that it was close. I'd planned that the ceremony would begin at twilight. My favorite time of day. Or night. Whatever it was. And I could see the shadows, the setting sun was casting all around the tower room.

Carlisle's strong voice cut through my thoughts. "Well, you both look stunning. I'm so happy for you Alice. And I'm so happy that you and Jasper are a part of our family. We may not have realized we were missing anything, but now that you are both here, I know now that we were. We're complete now. And Esme and I couldn't be prouder of you or the rest of our children." I felt the stinging in my eyes of tears that couldn't be produced. I squeezed him tighter and tucked my head against his chest. "Thanks Carlisle," was all I could manage to get out.

"Okay, enough of that. We've got to make sure you're ready to walk down that aisle like a rock star bride." Rose's tone was no-nonsense. I didn't dare argue with her. I let Carlisle go as he gave my back one last fatherly pat and stepped away. I whirled around and said, "Well? Am I ready?" Rose had her tilted to one side giving me a critical once-over.

"Wait!" She cried out. "Holy smokes, Alice, we nearly forgot your veil!" My hands flew to the top of my head. She was right! I'd been so caught up in my memories of the vows with Jasper that I'd completely forgotten. She walked over to the full length mirror where the tiara and veil were resting and was back to me in a flash, pinning it in my short hair that she'd somehow managed to get to lie flat after hours of flatirons and hair product.

"Perfect." She breathed. "Look." She grabbed my wrist and led me to the mirror. I couldn't believe that it was me. The tiara and veil made the picture complete. I truly looked like the stereotypical radiant bride. Couldn't say "blushing" bride since I couldn't blush anymore. But definitely radiant. I was glowing and my eyes were bright and happy.

Carlisle was looking out the back wall and said, "Okay girls, I think it's time to start. Esme's giving me the sign." And before I knew it, we were at the head of the aisle. Edward was playing an original composition of his own that he'd played for me the night before. It was my wedding gift from him and it was stunningly beautiful. "I call it 'Alice in Wonderland'" he'd said as he smiled crookedly at me as I sat beside him on the piano bench. "Well, that definitely has a nicer ring to it than 'Alice in Gustavus'" I'd teased him, bumping his arm with my elbow. But I'd been beaming at him because it was one of the most amazing gifts I'd ever received. My very own musical composition! And he was going to play it as I walked down the aisle to join my soldier. My mate. I took a deep breath, my vows ringing in my ears as I took the first step toward my destiny.

**Jasper's POV**

I felt like I was choking. Damn fool monkey suit! I reached up and tugged at the tight collar with my index finger. I was sure if it was physically possible, I would be sweating buckets about right now. I could feel Emmett shaking with suppressed laughter as he elbowed me in the side. Hard. I took my finger out of my collar and reciprocated. Hard. But I aimed more for his solar plexus and I felt a smidgen of satisfaction when I heard his quiet "Oof!". Good, took him by surprise. It was so much more satisfying going after Emmett instead of Edward. Edward always knew exactly what my next move was.

But Edward was on the stage next to the gazebo where Emmett and I were standing with Carlisle's minister friend from London, Victor Cambridge. Edward had begun playing some classical music piece. It sounded vaguely familiar but I had to admit that classical music wasn't high on my list of topics I could knowledgeably discuss. But now that he had started playing, it was real. This was going to really happen. Any minute, Carlisle was going to be marching my pixie bride down the aisle. Hell's bells, I was about to get hitched!

And to think, just a week ago, I hadn't been so sure that it really _would_ happen. Alice had scared the bejeezus out of me going after Maria on her own. I still wasn't entirely sure how I had kept myself from ripping Maria limb from limb. But I think it mostly had to do with Alice. Not wanting to disappoint her in any way. And even though she would've understood, I still don't think she would've exactly been proud if I had resorted to my violent side that seemed to come so naturally before she waltzed into my life.

And I really wouldn't have wanted that dark cloud to be hanging over us as we started our new life together. Knowing Maria as I did, she'd known when she was outnumbered and if nothing else, she was a survivor and master manipulator. She wouldn't bother us again. Not as long as Alice and I were with the Cullens. Which was pretty much looking like it might be forever now that we'd made it to this point—flowers by the bushel everywhere, twinkling lights, mounds of gauzy white fabric, a minister, music. All that was missing was my beautiful bride.

Esme had been fussing with last minute arrangements of flowers and fabric and well—whatever girls fussed with at weddings but she'd stepped toward the gazebo. She flashed a beaming brilliant smile on Emmett and me, her eyes shining in such a way that I knew they'd be filled with tears if she could cry. I smiled back, my gaze steady and sure.

You couldn't help but love Esme. She was the kindest, most caring mother-figure a vampire could ask for. And she looked lovely in a pale ice-blue silk suit, her caramel-colored waves flowing around her shoulders. It was easy to see how Carlisle could have fallen for her. I saw her give a quick wave up toward the second floor. That must have been the gesture for the Carlisle, Rose and Alice to come down. That meant it was time.

Suddenly, the music changed and it was "Alice in Wonderland". A song written especially for my pixie. It suited her. I'd heard it first when Edward had played it for Alice the night before. It was his wedding gift to her and honestly I didn't see how it could be topped. The complex, tinkling notes were light-hearted in tone and sounded _exactly_ like a pixie dancing around a fairy meadow. In fact, I could just picture my pixie dancing her way to me as the notes swelled and echoed around the trees as twilight descended on the cool Alaskan night.

And then there she was. My breath stopped. I was vaguely aware that Rosalie was gliding down the aisle at the human pace Alice had insisted on. I was minutely aware that my pixie's arm was threaded through Carlisle's--that he was walking her down the aisle as any proud papa might. But my eyes caught with Alice's and the world stopped around us.

It was as if we were in our own bubble, just the two of us. Almost exactly as it had been since that first moment she'd slipped her hand into mine in that diner long ago—when her eyes had met mine that first time—her first grin—our first kiss. It seemed so long ago and yet also as if only a second had passed since then. That's kind of how it was with vampire time. When eternity stretched out in front of you, it was sure going to be nice to finally have someone to spend it with.

And not just anybody. My Alice. My pixie. My love. She'd saved me that day in Philadelphia in so many ways. It was going to take an eternity just to show her my gratitude. Starting now.

The music had stopped. I hadn't even realized that she and Carlisle had reached the gazebo steps. Reverend Cambridge was speaking but I only caught the tail end of it…"who gives this woman away?" Carlisle glanced at Esme and then turned back to us stating in a sure voice, "Her mother and I do." I noticed that Edward had quietly slipped to Esme's side. Then Carlisle grabbed Alice's hand resting in the crook of his elbow, stretching it toward me.

As if in a fog, I felt my own arm shoot out and I noticed that my fingers were slightly trembling as Carlisle placed her tiny hand in my own large one. Strange…I felt as if I were outside of myself watching this ritual take place. Then I looked up and into Alice's beaming heart-shaped face, her eyes bright, her smile wide and I was completely present in the moment. It was as if my soul (if I had such a thing), snapped back into my body like a taut rubber band. That's all I'd needed. The touch of my pixie. That's all it ever took to make me a better man than I'd ever dreamed of being.

All too quickly, the good reverend had turned to me and I knew it was time. Time to say my vows. The vows Alice had insisted we write ourselves. I really wanted her to go first. I could feel her grip on my hands tighten. Then she began rubbing her thumb across the backs of my hands, trying to reassure me. I felt one corner of my mouth tilt up at the thought. Each of us always seemed to be trying to do that for the other.

I wondered if there'd ever be a time that both of us would just trust in the other's feelings. Well, I was going to do my damndest to make sure she never had to doubt how I felt about her for the rest of our days. Besides, I wasn't unsure of my feelings. I was just uncomfortable with all the attention on me. And I was completely afraid I was going to muck this up. I could feel my throat flex convulsively as I tried to open my mouth and say my vows. I could feel everyone's eyes on me and I suddenly felt like I'd been thrown into a lake of fire.

I stared desperately into Alice's eyes trying to convey all that my vows said about my undying love to her so that she'd know that the reason I couldn't speak had nothing to do with my feelings. Suddenly her eyes widened and she nodded in mute acknowledgement. This is when it came in handy to be able to manipulate feelings and to have someone who could see the future.

With one last gentle squeeze of my hands, she turned her head to the dashing Reverend Cambridge whose looks were as dark as Carlisle's were light and just as handsome. Or so I'd gleaned from Esme as she'd gushed over him when he'd come to stand in the gazebo. "I'll go first. I can't keep them in any longer!" Her singsong voice rang out and everyone's eyes swiveled from me to her and I could see the initial surprise. But then, almost in unison, they all shook their heads and chuckled. I think everyone would've been a little disappointed if it had played out any differently.

Reverend Cambridge turned to me, his eyebrows raised in question. I just nodded my agreement, still unable to muster a sound. "Okay, Alice, please, now is the time to give your solemn vow to Jasper." His voice was deep, rich with the decades he'd lived. Alice smiled at him and he returned her smile. The good feelings were flowing nice and strong all around. I was almost giddy with all the happiness.

Then Alice trained her gaze back on me and her smile dimmed a bit but there was still a hint of it at the corners. I saw her draw a deep breath. I kept my gaze focused on her face. I had a feeling that the burst of words that were about to come flowing out of my pixie's mouth would be in such a blur I wouldn't know what she said if I didn't pay complete attention. And then she surprised me. As always.

"Jasper, from my first glimpse of our future together, I knew I loved you. Some people say that love is written in the stars. But ours was written on my heart. You are my first good memory and I can't wait for us to make even better memories. Together. I will always be here for you. No matter what. And I will always believe in you. No matter what. And someday I'll convince you that you are good Jazz. At your core, where it counts, you are the best of all that is good." My gaze dropped from hers at that fervent assertion. I couldn't help but feel a little ashamed that she seemed to truly believe that about me.

She squeezed my hands and I looked back into her eyes. And then I was lost. "And I can't wait to spend the rest of my days just showing you how much I love you and proving to you how wrong you are about yourself, cowboy. And you know I _always_ get my way. No matter what." And then the little minx winked at me. That didn't seem too solemn-like. But I knew that the depth of her feelings were incredibly solemn. I could feel it all the way through my bones and deep into my dead heart.

I wanted to lean in and capture her lips in a fierce kiss. That was how I operated. She looked at me, her eyes full of love and…expectation. Oh, so she was finished. My turn. I'd written mine down, not sure I could trust myself to remember. On a battlefield, I had nerves of steel. To speak in front of even my family, I had the backbone of a jellyfish.

But as Alice looked at me, I knew that I couldn't read those vows. She deserved better than that. And then I decided. I was going to do something I would've never done on the battlefield. I was going to wing it. Say what was in my heart. I half-smiled down at her, now or never. No, definitely forever.

"Alice, the first day we met, I told you I was a man of action, not words so I have to start by asking you to forgive me because I know what I say will be a gross injustice to you and letting you know exactly how I feel." I couldn't look away from her eyes and she shook her head slightly and frowned a little at my words. I took a deep breath and opened my mouth and then my solemn vow to bind me to her forever was made.

"That day that you were waiting for me, you said I had kept you waiting a long time. And although at the time, I didn't completely understand what you meant, now I do. Because I realize now that you kept me waiting too. Until you came into my life, I was just existing, subsisting. There was no meaning for me. But you've changed all that. _You _are my meaning. And I've just been waiting all these years for you. You've made me believe that I can be better and I don't ever want to disappoint your faith in me. I want to be there for you no matter what and in whatever way you will let me for the rest of our days. The goodness and light that shine out of you make my burdens lighter and I hope I can be that for you too. You balance me in a way that no one else ever has and even though I know I don't deserve it, I want this life with you more than anything else I've ever dreamed possible. You're my pixie. My life. My love. And I do love you. My heart, such as it is, is yours. Forever. I vow to always be beside you, to always treasure you and the good things you give me, to protect you, and to love you unconditionally, even when you're doing your best to rile me up." I tilted one corner of my mouth up at that and she grinned impishly back. "I now know what the mean when they say "my better half" because you're mine. I'm not whole without you and I'm not good without you. But with you, I feel like I can be exactly the kind of man I should be." Then I mouthed to her "Love you pixie" and she mouthed back "Love you too, soldier."

The rest of the ceremony passed in such a blur that I honestly was only waiting for that moment when Reverend Cambridge was going to tell me I could seal our vows with a kiss. I know that we exchanged rings and Emmett made a big show of not being able to find them until Rosalie had growled at him and Alice giggled. Then before I knew it, the good reverend was pronouncing us husband and wife and finally gave me what I'd been waiting all day for, permission to kiss my bride! I lifted my pixie up until her face was even with mine and then captured her lips in a fervent, hot promise of many more to come. Our family was cheering and clapping but I took no notice. I finally only let her go when the reverend cleared his throat.

Alice pulled her face back and looked into my eyes. I'm sure we both had the biggest goofiest grins on our faces ever. But we'd done it. We were married. We'd overcome so many obstacles in such a short time. And now we had an eternity to fulfill as many of Alice's visions of love that we could. Well, at least as soon as I could persuade her to leave the reception and start making other kinds of human memories…


	26. Epilogue: Forks

So now this is really it. The end. Fin. Hasta la vista. I can't believe it! I think I'm a little in shock right now. Well, I hope I gave Jasper and Alice a proper send-off. First, I have to thank all of my readers and especially my reviewers for all of your support. It's awesome reading your reviews and very humbling as well as how many of you have added me to favorites and alerts. I'm truly touched. I'm so thrilled to see that so many of you seem to have fallen in love with these characters and their story as much as I have. (I mean, I know I loved them before but now…well, let's just say it's Jalice 4eva!) I also wanted to let you know that if you are interested in reading my next story well, it's going to be a Carlisle/Esme tale called "Whom I Love Alone"—hope you'll like it. I'll try to post the first chapter soon. And now drum roll…the Visions of Love Jalices (that's my name for the awards, lol!)

The Alice Who Definitely Kept Me Steeped in Happiness With Her Reviews: AliceSteepedInSadness

The Cheerleader Who Has Taught Me Inter-Country Communications Skills: Ilithiya

The Wolfgirl Who Is Slowly Making Me a Believer in the Pack: Wolfgirl404

The Reviewer Who Champions These Characters and Makes Me Crave Cupcakes Every Time I See Her Screenname: Sprinkledwithtwilight

Reviewer I've Missed Lately Because She Also Has Awesome Stories: Sidney Loves Werewolves

Reviewer Who Has the Knack for Picking Out My Favorite Lines Too: IamIyesha

Okay and now honorable mentions to those I haven't heard from in a while but whose faithful reviews really kept me going: angeleyenc, 2lulu2, laughingbubbles18, edwardcullenfan1918

If you weren't mentioned, please don't think that I don't appreciate your reviews, I do! These are just the ones I've had the most contact with and have also usually contacted me outside of this crazy arena. And please, please, PLEASE, one last review for the road? Pretty please? Keep in mind, I've never held a chapter hostage for reviews but really want to hear final thoughts! Thanks for making this such an amazing, memorable journey. Now all aboard, last call!

Disclaimer: I have written this as a fan of Stephenie Meyer's work and do not claim any ownership to the characters or plot lines (only my own original ideas!) of the Twilight Saga novels or anything Twilight-related.

Visions of Love

Epilogue: Forks

**Jasper's POV**

Forget Paris. Forget Rome. Forget Rio. Forks, Washington, population 3,120. That's where we were spending our honeymoon. And it was perfect. Of course, I figured anywhere that I was alone with Alice was a little piece of my very own heaven on Earth. Which worked out since I'd probably never get to experience the real thing anyway.

Esme had offered us use of her very own island, somewhere near Brazil—apparently a gift from Carlisle at some point. She hadn't offered the entire story and the tiny smile on her face had kept me from asking—not wanting to intrude on her privacy. And actually, I was pretty sure I didn't want to _know_ the story since she and Carlisle were kind of like my parents now.

Plus, I wasn't too keen on going too far. One, I didn't know about Alice but I couldn't wait to be alone and get our married life underway. But at the same time, I didn't want to be too far away from our new family. Carlisle especially had taken me under his wing. He seemed to intuitively know what a struggle my new "lifestyle" was for me. Either that or Edward was sharing what he read in my thoughts with Carlisle. But I didn't think so. Although, it helped being with Alice, I still felt safer, more in control of my monster when I was around my family. Safety in numbers I guess.

That's why I'd jumped on the option Carlisle offered us. This house, right outside of Forks. A house they hadn't lived in for decades but sounded like the best place for us. The only caution Carlisle had give was we were to stay off of the nearby Quileute Indian reservation—some place called La Push. No problem. I didn't really plan on us doing much sightseeing on this trip anyway. And honestly, one nasty-tasting deer tasted the same whether it was Alaska, La Push or Forks.

We'd wanted to get here as quickly as possible so we'd run down from Gustavus—Alice by my side the entire way, just as I dreamed it would always be. It'd been interesting traipsing through the forests of Washington bringing back memories of our first trip through on our way to the Cullens what seemed like a lifetime ago.

I'd been so unsure of everything then. Everything except Alice. Well, I was still unsure about _a lot_ of things. Except for Alice. And the way I felt about her. I still couldn't get over what a lucky SOB I was to have convinced her to bind herself to me forever.

We'd slowed to a more normal pace as we'd approached the winding driveway leading up to the house. I instinctively grabbed Alice's hand and I felt her turn her head, her gaze resting on my face. If I could have, I'm sure I would've blushed. I just couldn't help myself—I had to touch her in some way if she was within reaching distance. I started to drop her hand but her grip tightened on mine—refusing to let go. Now I was the one to turn my gaze on her. She had one of her goofy imp's grins, a knowing look in her eyes.

"So we're here." Her tone was hushed. She'd turned her head back toward the towering house in front of us. I couldn't help but half-smile. The Cullens apparently did not know the meaning of a "little fixer-upper" as Carlisle had described the house to me.

"Yep, looks like it." Okay, that was idiotic. But I suddenly felt shy. As if this were the first day I'd met her rather than our first day as man and wife. Neither of us had moved a muscle since coming to a stop in front of the steps leading to the porch. I was feeling her nervous energy and it only served to increase my own anxiety. She was always so dadblasted set on making human memories that I was sure I was forgetting to do or say something that she wanted. I was sure if I just waited long enough, she'd lose the battle against keeping her mouth shut and wanting me to figure it out on my own and would blurt out whatever it was she was expecting me to do. Any second now. Yep.

I felt a flush of heat through my body as the seconds ticked by. She cleared her throat lightly. Dammit, if I was Edward, I'd already know what she was thinking. She slowly turned her body towards me, keeping hold of my hand as she faced me. I glanced sidelong down at her expectant upturned face. Hell's bells, I was totally missing something. But what? A small sigh escaped her pursed pink lips. She glanced at the house and then back at me.

I glanced to where her gaze had fallen and then it hit me. I nearly smacked my forehead with my hand but I'm sure she already realized what a dolt I was. Of course! One of the most "human" memories a new bride could want. Without a second hesitation, I suddenly swept her into my arms, a look of surprise causing her eyes to widen as she looked into my face only inches from hers now.

"Jazz!" Her voice lilted sing-song like. I leaned in and gave her a swift, hard kiss. Then I moved forward, easily juggling her while opening the front door at the same time. "Well, here we go, Mrs. Hale." Her eyes twinkled at the use of her new name and I had to admit, it felt damn right to say it as I carried her over the threshold.

Then there were no more words for minutes, hours, days—who knew how long? As always, words weren't necessary when my pixie and I were together. And if I could keep my monster leashed, then my fervent hope was that that's the way it would always be. Forever.

**Alice's POV**

The real thing had lived up to so much more than I had expected with my wedding vision. And of course, the honeymoon, well…A delightful shiver ran up my spine and I felt my toes curl just at the thought of how much better the honeymoon was turning out than I could ever have imagined.

Jazz and I had found a lovely secluded meadow not too far from the house in Forks and had taken up the custom of coming and spending the late afternoons here through the night. We'd both missed looking up at the stars through our glass ceiling in our tower room back home. Not that we'd done much stargazing up to this point. A small smile touched my lips at the memories of all the reasons we'd been too engrossed to care up until now.

In fact this was the first "breather" we'd taken for awhile. The first time I'd had any thoughts about _anything _other than Jazz and how very delicious and wicked he made me feel. I gave a little stretch like a cat and rolled over resting my head on his shoulder while throwing an arm over his waist. I glanced up and noticed him looking up at the stars. I wondered what he was thinking…I couldn't help but think that it would be nice to have Edward's gift sometimes.

At the flash of Edward's name in my mind, I suddenly felt the strange prickling that would start behind my eyes and radiate through my temples when a vision was coming on.

_I was in the meadow. It was filled with flowers and tall green grass. Strange, where was Jazz? And then I saw him. He seemed hesitant to come out. Maybe because the sun was shining down. But it wasn't Jasper. It was Edward. What was he doing here? And then I heard her voice. I whipped my head around and there she was. I'd seen her before but hadn't really put it all together. It was the dark-haired girl with the chocolate brown eyes. I knew she was meant for Edward. And now I could see. He wasn't going to be alone! And it was going to have to happen here! _

The vision faded and my temples throbbed a little like they usually did when a vision came on me unbidden. I felt a laugh bubble up inside of me and escape my lips. Jazz shifted and looked down at me, one eyebrow raised in that quizzical look he gave me sometimes. Okay, a lot of times.

"Care to share, pixie?" I was so excited I couldn't help myself—I flung myself over his waist, straddling him, resting my hands lightly on his chest as I laughed down, capturing his gaze with my own. He smiled my favorite lopsided smile back, obviously feeling the effects of my good mood.

"I saw Edward in our meadow." Jasper's eyes darted from one side to the other as he pulled his head up. I laughed again. "Not _now, _soldier." He relaxed, resting his head back on the ground. "Good," he growled as he ran his hands from my shoulders down my bare arms causing that shiver to dance down my spine again. I grasped his hands with my own interlocking our fingers.

"I mean, I saw him in our meadow _someday._ With a girl." I grinned down at Jazz. His brow creased in confusion. Dang, back to being freaky vision girl who forgot others didn't see what I saw. Well, okay, freaky _married_ vision girl. For someone who didn't think they had very good self-control or patience, Jasper was the very picture of the patience of Job when he dealt with me. He didn't say anything, just waiting for me to continue. He knew I'd get the whole story out eventually.

As more flashes came to me, I looked down at him again and this time my brow was creased. "Well, crap. This won't be our meadow after we leave here. It's going to become Edward's. We'll show it to him. And then someday, he'll meet _her_. The human girl. And she's his. Like I'm yours. Like Rose is Emmett's. She's going to be his reason for existing." Another flash hit me then and I gasped. "And she's either going to be one of us. Or he's going to be unable to control himself." I shuddered. Jazz sat up and wrapped me in his arms.

"Don't worry, pixie. Edward's strong. Probably second only to Carlisle in resisting. It'll be fine." I knew Jazz was right but I'd have to warn Edward someday. He pulled back slightly but kept his arms around me. He leaned forward and rested his forehead against mine. "Trust me, if she means even half of what you mean to me, then he _will_ resist." His whisper pierced my unbeating heart and I know it would have been thudding if it could. I would never ever get tired of how this unassuming cowboy soldier could reach my very depths with only a few words without ever realizing how much he touched me.

Then he molded his lips to mine in one of those slow-burning kisses that ignited me in ways that some of the most fiery kisses we'd had couldn't even compare. And all thoughts of Edward and his Bella fled my mind for a long, long time. Well, it could still be _our_ meadow for a couple of more decades at least…


	27. Author Update

Author's Update: First I would like to thank everyone who enjoyed Visions of Love so much. Your messages and reviews have been amazing and so inspiring! To all of the fans of Jalice and Visions of Love, I thought you might like to know that I have posted a new story that tells some of the things that happen to Jasper/Alice during the New Moon period. It is called Underneath It All. I hope you will enjoy it as much as you have this story.

Peace, Love, and Twilight-Jenn


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